Two Questions for Mr. Trump

Part of how I make my money is counseling. Therefore, I would like to take a look at Mr. Trump.

Therapy with Donald Trump

The problem with someone like Donald Trump is that the way I see it, this man is almost a walking psychiatric emergency. I’m not saying he belongs in an emergency room. I’m saying that people like this are so far gone (in a sense) that they badly need treatment pretty much immediately for their own sake and also for that of others. Because people with Trump’s psychological makeup are simply dangerous.

Trump is a malignant narcissist. Malignant narcissists are dangerous by their very nature.

But there is another reason Trump is a psychiatric emergency. Someone like that is so far gone that it makes us sit up straight in our chairs when we see someone like this. It’s as if a physician had a terminal cancer patient walk into the room. Someone like Trump is so far gone off into a very bad psychological space that he needs to be treated immediately just as the cancer patient does. And he needs a lot of treatment. Sort of the psychiatric equivalent of radiation or chemotherapy. This is a personality that simply cries out for intervention because it is so disturbed.

Now, with someone like this, I would not mess around at all. There’s no time to lose with someone like this, and one could conceivably go round and round for a long time without getting anywhere. Just as you throw the cancer patient on chemo almost immediately, Trump needs “immediate psychiatric chemotherapy.”

I would cut right to the basics within maybe five minutes. There are two questions and two questions only that I would ask Mr. Trump as my way of getting down to business. These two questions cut right to the heart of the essence of what is wrong with him at his deepest core.

First question: “Who hurt you?” Somebody hurt Trump. Someone hurt him very,very badly, possibly at a very young age. I am not sure at what age he got hurt. I’m suspecting his mother, but his father was a classic psychopath and that may be part of it too. I’ve heard that the mother was a real piece of work.

As a consequence, Donald Trump stopped maturing possibly at age six. In other words, Trump has been six years old for his entire life. He likes being six because it makes him feel good. Ever met a 6- year-old? A more selfish and self-centered human does not exist. A 6-year old boy is a “little prince.” Everything is all about them.

All of most all of Trump’s pathology is simply a defense structure or character disorder. Personality disorders are nothing but gigantic bundles of defensive structures. They were erected, often in childhood, to protect the person for some sort of pain in life. We all have defenses and we all need to protect ourselves. Although we think of a defensive person as a bad thing, another way of looking at someone like that is that they are “well-defended.”

Your defensive structure is like a castle or fortification that you have constructed to protect yourself from the pain, failures, insecurities, wounds, etc. of life, of the things that make you depressed, anxious, lacking in confidence, or “wounded,” as it were. A person without adequate defenses walks around a good part of the time looking like a soldier in wartime who has just been wounded. His psychological pains and scars are visible for all to see, right there on the surface. It’s not attractive.

A person with a personality disorder has been so badly hurt somehow that they constructed a particularly elaborate fortress, almost a Rube Goldberg device with fake entrances, fake walls, hidden rooms, trap doors, stairways to nowhere, fake turrets, guns that pop out and vanish, fake soldiers as decoys manning the ramparts, almost like one of those Escher paintings where the structures and creatures seem at first to be going somewhere but really are not when you study it in more depth.

I’ve known people with defensive structures that I almost had to sit back and marvel at. If defensive structures could be wonders of the world, theirs would qualify. You almost had to take a step back and catch your breath when you saw them. The fortifications were so convoluted and elaborate that it seemed it would take a long time just to start to figure them out.

Without adequate defenses, you will be going through life getting hurt and knocked down all the time. After a while, you may pile up a lot of wounds and injuries to the point where it seems like there is something wrong with you. That’s because you didn’t protect yourself enough. Bottom line is defenses are there to keep us from feeling bad.

Most defenses are basically nothing but lies, but that’s fine. If we need to tell ourselves lots of lies to get through life without being badly injured along the way, so be it.

I’ve never been a fan of “face reality” crowd. My position is that for an awful lot of people, the worst thing they could possibly do is face reality. Reality for them is simply awful. Why face that? Why not construct a completely fake reality that’s not so awful and just go live in your fictional reality all the time? What difference does it make whether you live in “actually existing” reality or in some “fake, made-up or fictional” reality? Believe in whatever reality you need to to get through the day.

Anyway, there is some deep primal wound at the very heart of Trump’s psyche as there is with all such persons. And figuring out who it was who hurt him so terribly is an important road that we need to get started down right away to work with him.

Second question: Who do you love? This is very important. Does Trump love anyone? Has he ever? Obviously he loves himself. But how about anyone else? We need to get at this to see if there is anyone at all that he cares about more than himself. Trump’s main problem is that he loves himself far too much and others not enough or at all.

I’ve thought about this a lot, and it’s as if people only have so much love to go around. Perhaps if you love yourself far too much, you have “used up all your love supply” and there’s nothing left over to give to anyone else. That’s just a theory and it’s based on the theory that love does not grow on trees and that everyone has a limited amount of love inside themselves to give out. The theme of the narcissist is, “I’m great and you suck (you’re an inferior).”

Why shouldn’t people who have tremendous love for themselves also be able to love others? If someone merely loves himself but also loves others, we say he has high self-esteem. I suppose the theme of someone with high self-esteem could be, “I’m great, but you’re great too!” or something along those lines.

Often these people tone down their self-love a lot because most people don’t want to deal with a bragging, arrogant ass. And they are often able to put themselves down, make fun of themselves, or even insult themselves. They can admit they were wrong. They can feels sorry and say so. Somehow being able to admit to doing wrong, apologizing, and being self-critical are important to mental health.

I’m not sure exactly why that is. Perhaps commenters can help out there. When one does this, one is able to acknowledge and more importantly accept the whole self, warts and all. This is very hard to do. Perhaps accepting the whole self leads to a sense of calmness. It definitely leads to a sense of humility, which is attractive to other people. Perhaps it leads to greater love for others when one finally realizes that they are not so special after all and they are just another blade of grass in the football field of humanity.

The more we accept and embrace about ourselves, the fewer crazy defensive fortresses of defense we have to build up to shield us from the parts of ourselves that we do not accept. And when one accepts their own flaws, he can now accept those of others. Life is no longer a zero-sum game. It’s more of a shared sacrifice.

Somehow in the narcissist, something has gone terribly wrong. Their own self-esteem has been massively blown out of proportion, and in the process, they can’t have much love or care left over for anyone else. If the psychopath is the only person on Earth, the narcissist is the greatest person on Earth, and nobody else matters much. Or perhaps they are all contemptible inferiors.

Why the massive expansion of one’s own self-esteem occurs in tandem with such an arrogant devaluation of others is something that I still do not understand. Why is it necessary to devalue everyone else? Can’t you love yourself and love everyone else too? One problem I can see is that the narcissist is superior. Well, if you’re superior, obviously most other people are inferior, right?

Footraces have winners, losers, and everything in between. This person sees life as a footrace. Everyone can’t win. All men can’t be the top 20% Alphas. Everyone can’t be an above average driver. Everyone can’t be a millionaire, or otherwise a million bucks and $2.75 will get you a Slurpee at a 7-11 and not much else. Some are rich because others are poor. Some have won because others have lost.

Narcissists are also very mean. Narcissism is a lot more than simply massive self-love. The nice narcissist does not exist. If someone has a huge ego but is also nice, then we have to rule out narcissism. Inflated self-esteem is mostly a problem due to the nastiness, ugliness, meanness, and hatred that go along with it.

The main problem with narcissism is that they are not very nice people, to put it mildly. They are huge assholes. Narcissistic abuse is a thing. Now why this is I am also not very sure. Why must the narcissist be such a massive asshole? Bottom line is I understand most of the things that narcissists do but not why they do them. This part is a mystery to me.

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Stupid Reason Why I Was Multiply Banned from Reddit, Probably Soon to Be a Permanent Ban

I said it’s not a disorder for men to have sex with teenage girls. It’s not DSM-5 Pedophilia. Not only that but it is not any disorder at all in the DSM. There’s no disorder in the DSM called Adult Sex with Teenagers yet. Not yet.

If someone comes to me and says they had sex with a teenage girl, if I dx them with DSM-5 Pedophilia, I am committing malpractice.

That’s how anti-scientific this conflation of normal male sexuality with child molesting and pedophilia is.

I also said, not only is it not disordered behavior, it’s not even abnormal! This is true and you will find little argument about this among clinicians.

The argument against adult-teen sex is a moral and legal one, not a psychological one.

Adult-teen sex boils down to a moral matter. Perhaps it is immoral. Perhaps it is not. Society has decided it is immoral. That is their right. As for whether it is or not, clinicians leave that up to the moral philosophers, sociologists, and society as a whole.

We don’t get involved in things that are only right or wrong or even crazy or nuts because society says they are. In fact, in many cases, presented with what looks like psychosis, if it is normal within their culture to present this way during stress, we say they’re not psychotic. In fact, they are normal. Perhaps an Adjustment Disorder. If someone from our culture displayed the same symptoms, we would absolutely dx some form of DSM-5 Psychosis.

This is where, in a small sense, the anti-psychiatry people are right that the whole thing is a crock. It’s not a crock, but it is definitely true that what is normal and what is abnormal is in many cases constructed by society.

In fact there are complete psychological syndromes unknown in the rest of the world that have long histories, and even special names in certain countries or regions. There is a particular type of psychosis peculiar to Norway and the Scandinavian countries. It’s not seen outside of there. It has its own name, history, studies, on and on. This is simply one of the “appropriate Norwegian ways to go crazy.” Yes, even when people go nuts they don’t to do so in societally constructed ways!

Furthermore, clinicians don’t get involved in crime or moral questions of right and wrong. As I said, we leave that stuff up to the moral philosophers. You guys do it. We’re out. Stealing, rape, mugging, burglary, wife-beating, Hell, even murder or serial murder is not diagnosable under the current system. Most of these people are not the slightest bit nuts anyway.  They’re completely sane.  They’re just bad people. It’s a question of right and wrong, good and bad, not sane or crazy.

We might not even say that those crimes are abnormal behavior. I can think of circumstances where it would be just fine to commit any of those crimes. We probably wouldn’t say whether it’s normal or abnormal. Obviously it’s not adaptive and any society that allows that to go on willy-nilly is not a healthy one. But it might persist anyway. Last time I checked, Nigeria is still on the map. Instead we would just say that these are moral and legal matters, not psychological ones, and clinicians don’t deal with that sort of thing; instead, they deal with crazy and sane.

Furthermore, these matters, like teen-adult sex are legal matters. Society has decided that they hate it and that they wish to punish men who commit what they see as an immoral act. As far as whether these things should be illegal or not, clinicians throw that over to the lawyers, legislators, politicians, legal theorists and Hell, even public intellectuals because these are the people who, with input from the public, decide what is a crime and what is not. Whether something should be illegal or not is not a psychological question, nor should it be.

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Game/PUA: Some Very Creepy Truths about Adult-Minor Sex

I work in mental health and I specialize in people who have issues around thoughts about sex with children, etc. I’m an expert and I have people coming to me from all over the world.

First of all, no one is going to believe the facts I state are true. Trust me though: I’m right. All studies were done in the lab and have been repeatedly replicated. In fact, they’ve been replicated so many times that it seems stupid to do them again except morons keep demanding it. I guess we’ll be replicating them until the end of time then.

  1. Men are attracted to teenage girls. 100% of straight men react at very high levels, typically maximum, to females 13+. That should not be surprising to any sane person, except that in our Feminist Clown World, those men would be called pedophiles. We can call them any name we want, but we now have to call all straight men pedophiles. Are we comfortable with that?
  2. So much worse than that is the fact is that not only are straight men turned on by teenage girls who look like women, which is not surprising, but that 90-100% of straight men are even turned on by little girls under 13. More on that below.
  3. Yep, that’s right. Straight men are even turned on by little girls under 13. In general, most straight men are attracted to them at a fairly low level, less than they are to mature females, but a measurable attraction is definitely there.
  4. So much, much worse than that even is that 23% (in three studies – 21%, 23%, and 26%) of straight men test “pedophilic.” That means that 1/4 of straight men are pedophiles by our typical understanding of the term, which probably even includes DSM-5 Pedophilia, a garbage diagnosis if there ever was one. What this means is that 23% of all straight men are as attracted or more attracted to little girls under 13 as they are to mature females 13+. Crazy statistic, huh? The question arises why these men don’t run around molesting little girls. Penalties are very harsh if you get caught doing this, and almost all these men have very strong attractions to mature females, so I assume they focus on the prosocial urge and suppress or repress the antisocial pedophilic feelings. In the Current Year, tens of millions of Americans say they want to kill all the pedophiles. Well, that’s just fine. Are they prepared to execute 1/4 of the men in the US, or 25 million men? Let me know when they get those gas chambers running.
  5. Not sure if this is shocking, but .1-1% of straight men are actual, true pedophiles. They are strongly attracted to girl children and have little or no attraction to mature females, which is the only definition of pedophilia that makes sense. Nevertheless, this means there are 110,000-1.1 million full blown, real deal, scary pedophiles in the US. Once again, we say we are going to execute them. Fine. We are going to execute 100,000-1 million American men? Let me know how that goes.
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Bipolar Disorder: Manics Are Literally the Worst People on Earth

Bipolar Disorder is a mental illness formerly called Manic Depression. Bipolar people alternate between episodes of mania, characterized by high energy, little sleep, elation, excessive or frantic activity, wild spending, promiscuity, heavy alcohol and drug use along with aggression, rage, hostility, menacing behavior, extreme irritability, wild rages and temper tantrums, and even crimes, at times even violent crimes, as we shall see below.

The other periods are the down periods characterized by Depression. You all know what that entails so I won’t go into details.

In between, the manic is typically fine or at least goes back to their premorbid personality,  whatever that was like. It’s as if the illness has vanished altogether.

The episodes can may occur within a day or be up to three years apart.

If untreated, there is a tendency to worsen over time. This is because untreated mania actually causes physical damage to your brain. Every time you have a manic episode, your brain gets damaged. Then when you have another one, it’s gets more damaged, and on and on, accumulating over time.

Then the illness worsens. The manic episodes last longer and seem to worsen in quality. The time between episodes shortens. Finally, they reach the point where they are no longer normal between episodes and instead they are mildly manic or hypomanic between episodes.

In my family’s case, the person went from 5 to 3 to 1 1/2 to now where they come only 6 months apart. 9-10 months of mania, 6 months of hypomania, and then another 9-10 months of mania. So they are literally spending  a majority of their existence now in major manic episodes.

The drugs used are mood stabilizers between episodes, which seem to calm them down and prevent new major episodes, and antipsychotics for a Major Manic Episode because they’re so nuts that that’s the only thing that will bring them down.

The Angry, Aggressive, Irritable, and Violent Manic

Although the stereotype is of the happy manic on top of the world, that may not be typical. I heard a psychiatrist speak once and she said that among her male Bipolar patients, there were about 10 angry, irritable,  etc. manics for every happy one. The women may be more of the happy manics.

I’m living with one of these monsters right now, and it’s pure Hell. When he goes manic he’s basically Charles Manson. Pure evil. It’s like paranoid schizophrenia in the sense that they’re not just nuts, but they’re also aggressive and dangerous. They’re angry, hostile, hateful, abusive, aggressive, menacing, destructive, and even violent assholes from Hell.

And of course when they go manic, they lose all insight. If you confront them and tell them they’re having an episode, they flip out, scream and yell like a maniac, throw things, and get very menacing like they’re going to hit you. And they may indeed hit you.

In addition, because of stigma, there is often a lot of resistance to accepting the fact that they are ill. Our family member denied that he was ill for 38 years, from age 17 to age 55. Even now, in the midst of an episode, I guarantee he will deny being ill. That’s just how the illness works and also this person has one of the most extreme Denial defenses I’ve ever seen built up.

We have a family member with this illness and he has had many manic episodes over the years. Every time he has an episode, I’ve always been around. And every time, we got into at least one fist fight. Plus I usually get into a fistfight a year or so even when he’s not manic, except he’s never not manic.

When he’s not having an episode, he’s hypomanic, or a little bit manic. He’s literally been manic all the time, either hypomanic or manic, for ~15 years now. This is not a pleasant person to be around.

If you criticize, correct, or attempt to enforce any rules on them, you get met with a wild, screaming, violent tantrum and possible violence of some sort.

Angry, irritable manics are the literally worst human beings on Earth. When they go manic they turn into narcissistic psychopaths.

Of course in our case, his worthless therapist and psychiatrist won’t listen to me to up his meds. I contacted them and told them that he’d gone into a major manic episode, and they blew me off, said I was incapable of diagnosing mental illness, called me paranoid, denied that he was ill, and made me out to be the bad guy.

They’re so stupid and incompetent they can’t even figure out he’s nuts, and they refuse to believe me.

This is a typical scenario. The therapist has little or no understanding of the illness –  I know the disorder far better than he does (very common) – which is typical. The psychiatrist does worthless telemedicine, so I guarantee she won’t be able to diagnose him. Plus I’m not allowed to talk to her due to some crazy misinterpretation of the HIPAA law that was passed  recently.

If you have this diabolical illness, for God’s sake, accept your illness, and get on meds right now. And listen to your loved ones when we tell you you’re going nuts because you won’t be able to tell. The worst thing about these satanic illnesses is not just that they make people dangerously insane, but they blind the sufferer to that fact.

Manics are dangerous as Hell. They often commit crimes in episodes, and they are commonly arrested and jailed, often many times, typically at least once per episode.

They are also extremely aggressive and, yes, violent.

They have a very high rate of being arrested for violent crimes, like 22%. I’m surprised it’s that low. And they have a very high homicide rate, vastly above average.

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The Best People Feel the Worst and the Worst People Feel the Best

A lot of nations and peoples commit genocide. Genocide is almost normal human behavior. But good people and nations feel bad after they Holocaust a group. Sometimes it takes them a bit of civilizing to get there, but get there they do.

These psychological types act the worst of all but feel no guilt. As an example, psychopaths are wildly aggressive and show absolutely zero guilt. Obsessionals on the other hand, are the least aggressive people on Earth and are overwhelmed with guilt. This seems bizarre until I learned this in my counseling practice.

The best people feel the worst. The worst people feel the best. Why the Hell do good people feel bad? Because it is their extreme guilt itself which keeps them acting good! Why to bad people feel great? Because it is precisely their lack of guilt which makes them act so bad!

It seems totally confounding until you sit down and think about it.

This is also why I think clinicians attacking their clients’ guilt and self-help types urging us to get rid of our guilt are worse than charlatans. Not only will their tactics achieve their goals – the theory is that ridding someone of guilt will make them a better person – but actually backfires and makes people worse, so it’s iatrogenic. They claim to make better people by dissolving people’s sense of guilt but instead they are making people worse.

One of the first things I do with my clients, who typically come to me overwhelmed with guilt, is to congratulate them for their extreme sense of guilt and conscience. I also tell them that their guilt is what is creating their illness, so too much guilt is not necessarily a good things. But I tell them that the very reason that are ill in the first place is because they are good people. In fact, they are actually too good!

Yes, it is indeed pathological to be too good. Former Jew Catholic convert and virtual saint Simone Weil starved herself to death during World War 2. The world was a very evil place then, and Weil was simply too good for this world, so she checked out.

And like Weil, I tell my clients that their problem is that they are good people in a bad world, and worse that they are simply too good for their own good. There’s no reaso to be a saint and being too good can actually lead to social pathology because we simply did not evolve to be saints. In fact, in the past, primitive people who were too good probably were the first to get killed.

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Have You Ever Accessed CP Knowingly or Unknowingly? Take the CP Test Today!

SHI: OK, so just to clarify things one last time. You know I really must dot the i’s and cross the t’s, otherwise I can’t ease my mind. A very simple question really. Simply answer whether I am guilty or not guilty of CP in the following situations. OK?

A) I I stumble upon the nude pics of a 12-year old girl on an Internet browser/mobile app. But, it does not display her vagina. I do not immediately close the browser.

GUILTY — NOT GUILTY

B) Same thing as above but I save the pic on my computer/phone. Not due to pornographic intent but only because I feel it’s “cute”.

GUILTY — NOT GUILTY

C) I stumble upon the nude pics of a 12-year old girl but it displays her vagina. I immediately shut down the browser and erase all my cookies.

GUILTY — NOT GUILTY

D) Same as above. But, I look at the pics with keen interest and even save it on my PC/mobile.

GUILTY — NOT GUILTY

E) I accidentally see the pic of a 12-year old boy flashing his penis. Maybe I save the pic on my computer because it’s funny. Reminds me of my own 12-year old self.

GUILTY — NOT GUILTY

F) I accidentally see the nude pic of a 7-year old girl along with her vagina. But, I have no negative intention. I’d treat her like it’s my daughter. It is just a child after all. I save the pic on my computer.

GUILTY — NOT GUILTY

Correct answers only, please. To clarify, I’m not a pedophile. These are hypothetical questions. I strongly believe that children below 16 years should not be disturbed or accosted by adults. They should be left alone to enjoy their childhoods.

The question is at what point does one draw the line?

If you’re turned on by teenage girls, you’re not a pedophile anyway.  There’s only one word for men who are turned on by teenage girls: normal! If you are a man and teenage girls don’t turn you on, there’s two possibilities: You’re either gay or you’re dead.

All these living men who claim that teenage girls don’t turn them on and that all men turned on by teenage girls are pedophiles are simply faggots! They’re gay.  They’re homosexuals. They put men’s cocks in their mouths and suck on them until the cocks spurt cum down their fag throats. They take men’s hard cocks up their anuses until they ejaculate.

I mean you can argue if a man who does that is a man, but I don’t think any man who sucks on penises and lets penises penetrate his anus is not much of a man. Not any man I would want to know anyway! Real men don’t suck cocks! Real men don’t take cock up the ass! I mean is that point even open for debate?

Even if little girls turn you on, you’re not abnormal. 90% of adult men are aroused by preteen girls. 24% of all men are aroused by preteen girls as much as they are aroused by mature females.

In  other words, 24% of all men score “pedophilic” in the lab. Do you understand now why I don’t care if some guy gets turned on by little girls? I mean if that’s the case, he’s almost normal.

So if you are a man, I don’t really care if little girls turn you on. I am a lot more interested if little girls turn you on and mature females do not: that means you are a pedophile.  There’s no shame in being a biological pedophile, but I think it is cause for concern in a sense because I think you are at risk of committing a sex crime.

Keep in mind that I have done actual counseling with pedophilic men who had no attraction to mature adults and were only attracted to minors. I  liked both of them a lot, and I thought they were great people. Neither had offended. One man was so wracked with guilt that he was going  to cut his penis off in order not put kids at risk – that’s how deeply wrong he felt messing with kids was. He kept saying over and over, “I cannot hurt a kid…”

People have the wrong idea about pedophiles. However, I do think that all actual pedophiles should be in some sort of therapy designed to keep them from offending. Either that or put them all on an island where everyone is over 18. Why is that such a bad idea? I really like that idea.

I will go over  your hypothetical  scenarios:

A) I I stumble upon the nude pics of a 12-year old girl on an Internet browser/mobile app. But, it does not display her vagina. I do not immediately close the browser.

GUILTY — NOT GUILTY

Not guilty. There’s no CP.

B) Same thing as above but I save the pic on my computer/phone. Not due to pornographic intent but only because I feel it’s “cute”.

GUILTY — NOT GUILTY

Same thing. There’s no CP.

C) I stumble upon the nude pics of a 12-year old girl but it displays her vagina. I immediately shut down the browser and erase all my cookies.

GUILTY — NOT GUILTY’

You stumbled upon it so you’re not guilty.

D) Same as above. But, I look at the pics with keen interest and even save it on my PC/mobile.

GUILTY — NOT GUILTY

Unfortunately, let’s put it this way: you now have CP on your drive. I seriously request that you get that crap off your drive right now.

E) I accidentally see the pic of a 12-year old boy flashing his penis. Maybe I save the pic on my computer because it’s funny. Reminds me of my own 12-year old self.

GUILTY — NOT GUILTY

I don’t know if that’s illegal or not. If it was put up there as CP, then it might be illegal. If it’s put up there for some other reason, probably not. But I don’t know much about CP with males because I’m not into males. I only like females. Hell with males ha ha.

F) I accidentally see the nude pic of a 7-year old girl along with her vagina. But, I have no negative intention. I’d treat her like it’s my daughter. It is just a child after all. I save the pic on my computer.

GUILTY — NOT GUILTY

Yeah, you now have CP on your drive. I don’t care if you saved it because it reminds you of your daughter. Get it off your drive right now.

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Case History: Boy, Age 15, Killing Puppies

In my peer counseling practice, I have so far had two animal killers. One was a 16 year old boy in Germany. He came to me about violent thoughts but he didn’t and couldn’t pay. Nonetheless he was so profoundly disturbed (killing puppies) that I felt that he needed an immediate intervention so I simply worked with him for free. Also I sometimes work with teenagers for free as they can never pay.

This boy had rescued a dog and made a pet out of it. It was a female and soon enough it had puppies. The boy then strangled all of the puppies one by one.

I was very alarmed by this, but I had to tread very carefully. I did not get angry at him for killing the puppies, nor did I act shocked. My attitude was just, “Ok, so you killed some puppies.” I told him that killing puppies was wrong, and he should not have done that. This prompted a weepy apology session where he tried to defend himself by saying it wasn’t his fault. I accepted his apology and didn’t bother him about killing the puppies.

However, I did say that I wanted this puppy-killing to stop, and I didn’t want to hear about him killing any more puppies. I was emphatic about this. He readily agreed.

A lot of clinicians will freak out and get very angry at a client who is killing mammals, but I think that is the wrong approach. The client is just going to get his back up at best, and he may well get up and walk out of the room at worst.

Even if you are shocked and horrified by the mammal-killing, it is important to not show your feelings. You can raise your eyebrows, suck in your breath, say, “Wow”, things like that, but don’t get mad at them. However, you need to throw down a hard limit of no more mammal-killing at least while the client is talking to you.

Not all mammal-killers are bad human beings. A lot of them are but not all of them. Some of them are good people who are simply ill. Also it’s just a lower mammal. Killing a dog or a cat, as much as we love them, is simply not the same as killing a human, sorry.

I finally figured out that he was probably hallucinating voices although he denied that he was, as he called them thoughts and not voices. But you can tell through careful questioning and listening carefully to their answers whether you are dealing with thoughts or hallucinations. Sometimes what people describe as “thoughts” are actually auditory hallucinations. He was getting command hallucinations telling him to kill the puppies, and he was acting on them.

He also had some other problems. His mother was dead. At age 13, his mother had taken him and herself to the railroad tracks in order to get hit by a train and commit dual suicide. At the last minute the boy ran away from the train. The mother stayed on the tracks and was killed. That’s a pretty traumatizing experience!

He had a flat attitude about him where he was always saying, “I don’t care.” It seemed a bit odd how he seemed to not care about so many things.

He kept to himself at school and drew pictures a lot. For some reason his behavior was odd enough that his schoolmates bullied him. They often hit him. He would fight back vigorously, so he was getting into fights all the time. I didn’t think this was pathological, as he was just defending himself.

After he killed the puppies he felt so guilty that he put his hands in boiling water for a long time to punish himself. This had caused some injuries to his hands.

He also didn’t get along with his father at all for whatever reason.

He was extremely confused sexually and most of his early sexual experiences from 13-on had been with other boys. But now he had a girlfriend with whom he was having regular sex, and he said he had discovered that he liked sex with women just fine. I figured he was probably straight or at least not gay. He was one of the most sexually confused people I have ever dealt with.

He also told me that he had killed a pet rabbit when he was five years old. After a bit I figured out that this was in response to a command hallucination also.

I relayed the case to a former therapist, a clinical psychologist, and he told me that mammal killers are often either psychopaths or psychotic. He also suggested that this boy may be on the track to develop Borderline Personality Disorder. He was a Pre-Borderline if you will.

We have to say this because we cannot diagnose personality disorders in people under 18 because personality often changes quite a bit, especially in adolescence. In particular, a lot of adolescents appear psychopathic but then they age out of it as they become adults. A lot of juvenile delinquents are actually just “temporary” criminals.

The BPD did fit with the self-harm (Borderline men, like Borderline women, often self-harm), the constant fighting (Borderline men often pick fights a lot), the identity confusion, and the sexual confusion.

Borderline men are bad. They’re much worse than Borderline women.

I told him it was absolutely imperative that he get to a psychiatrist and find out what was going on with his head. His father convinced him to go to a psychiatrist, and he was diagnosed with schizophrenia as I suspected.

He had a rather apathetic and “so what?” attitude about that too.

People can be apathetic for various reasons. I had an OCD man who wrote to me once with a 10 page long history of his illness. He was from India.

He worried about every stupid thing under the sun, but he also kept saying, “I don’t care” through the paper. In this case, obviously he did care and in fact, he cared way too much. So the constant “I don’t care” was probably a defense against his over-caring and the illness that developed out of it. It was a thought compulsion to counteract the excessive caring that was causing the obsessions.

However, in this case, the apathy made sense to me after his diagnosis because schizophrenics often seem apathetic, and one of the symptoms of the illness is flat emotions.

So you see not all mammal-killers are psychopaths. There can be other things going on too.

However, I must say that this boy was one of the most seriously disturbed clients I have ever had.

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A Look at the Cluster B Personality Disorders: Narcissistic, Psychopathic, Borderline and Histrionic Personality Disorders

Rahul:

Have you met someone with multiple Cluster B personality disorders?

Nope. I have never even met one person with a diagnosed Cluster B disorder, much less multiple ones. Each disorder is its own syndrome, and I doubt if many people get diagnosed with multiple Cluster B disorders.

But I have met people who I thought were psychopaths or had psychopathic traits or Antisocial Personality Disorder (APD).

I’ve met people with obvious Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD).

I’ve never met anyone with Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD), but I have met people who I believe had it, and my friends and relatives knew people who had it.

I’ve never met a Histrionic Personality Disorder (HPD) or anyone who I thought had it.

These are the “Insufferable Asshole/Total Fucking Bitch” Personality Disorders. They can also be called the “Satanic Monster Straight from Hell” Disorders. For the most part, from my vantage as an introvert, most all of these people are anywhere from lousy to out and out horrible people. All the men are assholes. And all the women are psychobitches.

The common denominator in the Cluster B disorders is drama and chaos. All of these disorders generate large amounts of both. Another common trend is profound selfishness or self-centeredness. A lot don’t care much about most other people. And even when they do, they typically don’t treat them very well.

Cluster B types are extremely crafty, and many hazy Borderline women with Borderline traits without the full disorder are able to function quite well in society, albeit their personal lives are typically mired in drama and chaos, the two hallmarks of BPD.

These women are called “High-Conflict Women,” and they are literally everywhere, walking landmines stalking our society in plunging necklines and yoga pants. They’re bait, the flashing lure of the femme fatale darting through the human current, daring you to bite.

A female psychologist runs a website warning men about these psychobitches. The page I saw ran to 500 pages. These women typically hook up with good, decent, nice men. These men are very good people. I suppose you could call them nice guys except that the term has been so abused nowadays. These bitches attach to these men like remoras and literally suck the life out of them like any parasite does.

The therapist states that there is basically no cure for High-Conflict Women, or if they do get cured, you never know when it might happen, so you should not hang around suffering for a day that may never come. Recovery, if at all, may be decades into the future.

Why they attach to these good, kind, decent men is unknown, but they probably think these guys are suckers or doormats for their abuse. Face it, very few hard masculine men are going to cotton to these harridans. These women don’t end up with typical macho men because most of these guys would probably kill these bitches.

These Cluster B types can be very crafty and are often able to control their behavior very well. They are like the boss who sucks up to her superiors and then turns around and beats up her underlings.

Many Cluster B’s are “controlled” Cluster B’s such as “controlled psychopaths,” etc. The controlled psychopath type spends their life riding on the edge of the law, sometimes barely slipping over. Yet old studies show that most psychopaths never spend a day in a jail or prison. Instead they are what I would call “legal criminals.” They’re slippery as eels and oily as kerosene.

“Legal criminals” as in, say, our President for instance, who is absolutely a case of severe NPD. In fact he has a malign variety of NPD called Malignant Narcissism, the most extreme type of NPD. This is narcissism that has gone so far off the rails that it is moving out of narcissism and heading off towards psychopathy.

One famous clinician from the psychoanalytic days described Malignant Narcissism as “pure evil.” Indeed a few serial killers have been Malignant Narcissists. I think the best diagnosis for Ted Bundy is not psychopathy but Malignant Narcissism, and I am not alone.

So our great MAGA president has literally the exact same mental disorder as Ted Bundy has. Let that sink in. Donald Trump is Ted Bundy. Granted, Trump is a controlled variety, a “legal criminal,” and Bundy was a severely uncontrolled variety, but they both have the same disorder.

Oh one more thing. It is universally acknowledged among clinicians that if Malignant Narcissists are anything, they are dangerous. Every one of them, no exceptions. So Mr. Trump is a dangerous man, but most Americans can probably figure that out by now.

The two disorders, narcissism and psychopathy, are on a continuum, with one view having psychopathy as an extreme version of narcissism.

Histrionic PD has typically been thought of as “psychopathy in the female.” This is correct as psychopathy in women is not nearly as bad as it is in men, and it typically results in this lousy woman called “the whore.”

Indeed, 45% of all female prostitutes are diagnosed psychopaths, which should not surprise you if you know anything about these women. Most prostitutes are a step away from being out and out thieves, and quite a few of them actually are small time thieves. But the thievery occurs in the context of sex and a lot of alcohol and drug abuse, and charges are rarely filed.

They’re the bitches you go out on a date with, and when it’s over, you are $50 poorer (which you had no intention to spend – she just weaseled it out of you), and you didn’t even get laid. And yes, that sentence is autobiographical.

An argument has been made recently that BPD is simply psychopathy in the female. Traditionally it was thought of as “narcissism in the female.” Men get NPD, women get BPD, but it’s the same disorder just presenting differently between the sexes.

As I alluded above, HPD has often been thought of as “psychopathy in the female.” Men get psychopathy, women get HPD,  but once again it’s the same animal varying by gender. This HPD female psychopath as the femme fatale or the basic “whore” personality.

They’re mostly lousy women, but psychopathy in the male is so much worse because psychopathic men are so much more physically dangerous, whereas women are not particularly violent physically. Psychopathic men cause far more damage to society than psychopathic women do.

They can be verbally and spiritually violent, and they can kill a man’s soul if he doesn’t toughen up enough, but they are typically not physically violent. Women almost seem to have an inborn aversion to physical violence. They nearly recoil at the mention of it.

Whores just lighten your wallet, often unsuspectingly. Male psychopaths, at least the uncontrolled type, are often literally monsters who commit a tremendous amount of aggression, abuse other humans wantonly, callously, and habitually, and feel not one iota of guilt about any of it. A female psychopath might take your money, but a male psychopath might take your life.

Cluster B folks are extremely manipulative, so they are often able to hide their disorder while at work. Narcissists are experts at this, and psychopaths are always hiding their illness by the very nature of the condition. They don’t call it the “mask of sanity” for nothing.

Poor functioning BPD’s often cannot work at all. But some very bad ones are able to control the illness the whole time they are at work, but the minute they get home, the psychobitch comes out to play, and they abuse, manipulate, gaslight, and generally drive insane any other main person in their lives, typically a husband or boyfriend.

I had a female physician client like this. She has an extremely kind face, and she rescued stray animals, especially cats. She was a good doctor and a model of sanity at the hospital, but the minute she gets home, the human black widow spider leaped out and sucked her husband into her devious crazy-making nightmare of a web.

That’s why I don’t have a lot of sympathy for these “Asshole/Bitch disorders.” When I realized that they could control it completely for eight hours at work only to unleash their terror and entropy the moment they walk into the front door to come home, I lost sympathy for them.

I thought, “Hey, they can control it. They’re just choosing not to.” And indeed, most Cluster B’s very much enjoy being horrible. They get a kick out of it.

Narcissists love to be assholey jerks. It’s entertainment to them.

Psychopaths of course live to prey on other humans, often abusing them sadistically for sheer kicks.

BPD women can be profoundly mean, and I  think they might get off on being superbitches. They also seem to actually enjoy being crazy. I had a BPD client, the most severe case of BPD I have ever seen, who honestly didn’t want to give up her disorder. I finally concluded that she actually enjoyed being nuts. Maybe it’s exciting?

HPD femme fatales and Mata Hari types exploit, manipulate, connive, con, and in one way or another steal from others, particularly their male partners who are driven to Hell and back. I’ve never known one, but I imagine they get a lot of kicks out of this wild, sadistic, exploitative, and at times psychotic condition. They certainly lead “wild lives.”

I believe that what women want most in life is “peak emotional experiences.” So I just answered Freud’s baffled question. The emotions can be good, bad, or ugly, or up, down, or all around, this way or that, up or down, forwards or backwards. It doesn’t particularly matter.

They’re all peak experiences, either good or bad, and this dramatic feral behavior seems to provide women with what they desire most in life.

If you think about it, women are like drug users.

What are “peak emotional experiences?” They are “rushes.” So the woman lives for the rush, up or down doesn’t particularly matter, it’s all wildness and living life to the fullest as they see it.

And what happens when we take drugs? “Rushes.” They can be good, bad, or six ways from Sunday, especially when you get into the hallucinogens, but face it, it’s always a rush one way or another when you are high on dope. Without the rush, dope isn’t even dope. It’s nothing, a handful of leaves, sand, or water in your hands. Dope is literally the rush itself.

Rushes don’t have to be good. Even bad rushes can be good if you like it wild. The fear of the bad trip is part of the rush.

Live dangerously. Roll your own smokes. Straight Scotch, no water. Die with your boots on.

These are the ways that men live wild lives, but women have their own version, which is more based on wild emotions themselves as described above.

Bottom line is that Cluster B people get along great in our society because they are extroverted and often successful. Many have excellent people skills. They are expert manipulators and they can a lot done and achieve a lot of things, albeit sometimes via nefarious means. I would say that our culture itself is essentially sociopathic or Cluster B. So America is a Cluster B country then.

Despite their success it’s obvious to me that almost all Cluster B’s are either an insufferable assholes/sheer monsters/psychobitches from Hell at least part the time. They’re not very nice people.

But our society likes angry, aggressive, Type A extroverted assholes. We are an “asshole society.” Look at our president. Real careful. Trump is is us, me and you and him and her. He’s our reflection in the mirror. He’s all around us every day, everywhere we go. Trump is the quintessential American, the good, the bad, and the ugly, the whole nine yards.

You would think that being a total fucking bitch or a huge raging asshole would get you fired from a few jobs here and there, and sometimes Cluster B’s do lose jobs.

Borderlines can be so disturbed that they can’t work at all.

Almost all narcissists can work and they often rise to high levels in society.

Controlled psychopaths can work and often rise to very high levels. They do tend to get fired more than average, but they usually land on their feet and bounce right back like nothing happened.

Histrionics can definitely work, albeit often at shady jobs. Many prostitutes, porn stars, cam girls, strippers, and so on have Histrionic PD. And if you study the life history of a lot of these women, many of them are lousy people.

Never get involved with a whore or a prostitute. It’s one of the worst mistakes you can make as a man. Some strippers are ok, but even those are often moody and nutty.

A lot of HPD’s have the callous exploitative character of the prostitute.

A lot of female porn stars seem to be pretty horrible human beings. On the other end, I’ve never known a female porn star. But reading around, many act very bad, and they are often arrested and are in and out of jail, especially after they leave the industry. Many have serious drug problems while working and then afterwards. Suicides are surprisingly common. I would not get involved with a porn star if I were you.

All of these prostitute types are exploitative, mercenary women who regard men as walking ATM’s and, like all “whore” types, are to drain your wallet and bank account, run up all your credit cards, and then leave you high and dry, spinning in a circle, feeling like a hurricane just hit you, and thinking, “What was that?” This is exactly the experience many victims of male psychopaths describe.

Many prostitutes, strippers, and porn stars are low level thieves. Callous, hard, cold thieving bitches.

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Alt Left: Feminism in Academia and Social Work

Rod Fleming: The trouble is, they’ve infested academia, and the schools of education and social work were the very first to fall. Essentially, all teachers now are Postmodern, ‘intersectional’ feminists and all social workers believe the nuclear family is an abomination and the State is the only body capable of raising children. In other words, that they know better than parents do, how to bring up their own kids.
This is not new; the creeping infestation has been going on for decades. It’s just that the reaction to Trump’s election threw it at the fan and the secret is out. Google the Orkney child-abuse scandal.

Yes, they have infested the academy. They are mostly in the Women’s Studies program, although my field of Linguistics got taken over by the worst SJW’s a long time. Really all of the social sciences have gone SJW, and all universities are hotbeds of SJWism. However, I am acquaintances with two university professors, one in the US and one in Europe. Both of them hate modern SJWism. The American professor is so famous that he has a Wikipedia entry. They both act like they have to be very quiet about this or they might lose their jobs though.
Wait, Rod.
Your Reaction gets in the way of a lot of your otherwise decent theory.
3rd wave intersectional feminists do not want to get rid of the nuclear family. Some 2nd wave radical and other feminists talked about that. These were usually coming from a Hard Left Marxist POV.
You would be hard-pressed to find an “abolish the nuclear family feminist” anywhere now. They don’t exist anymore. And I don’t know anyone, no matter how leftwing, who thinks the state does a better job of raising kids than the family does. They didn’t even believe that in the USSR.
If you work in mental health though, you better be on board with modern feminism. If you’re not and your views get out, the feminists will try to get your license pulled. I could not believe how hard my male therapists sucked up to women. It was actually rather disgusting.  I want a therapist who’s a man, not some cuck.

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Voyeurism, Exhibitionism, and Escalation to More Serious Crimes

It is a common myth, especially among feminists, that some people with paraphilias such as voyeurs and exhibitionists (peepers and flashers) commonly escalate to more serious offenses such as burglary, sexual assault, rape or homicide.
As with so many things in life, this is a half-truth.
Some or a certain number of flashers, peepers, etc. do escalate more or less as described above, yes. I am not sure I would call it shifting of boundaries, although that’s what is going on. Instead of shifting it is more like an escalation of boundary violations to more extreme violations. I also don’t know if it’s about respecting boundaries. I’ve read a lot about these paraphilias because I do work in this area as part of one of my jobs, and I’ve never heard people describe paraphilic escalation as a shifting of boundaries, even if that’s what it is.
To the flasher or peeper, their problem is more of a compulsion or an addiction than anything else. They feel a build-up of pressure in the period before the act which builds to a very uncomfortable level, and they feel that the only way to reduce the pressure is to do the act. They commit the act in a rush of fear and excitement, and the act is very sexually stimulating to them. After they do the act, there is a catharsis, and the pressure is relieved. Sometimes they feel guilty afterwards.
In therapy with these people, many of them are actually decent men with good jobs,  good fathers and husbands. They simply have a paraphilia – a sexual disorder – that takes the form of an addictive-like behavior or a compulsion. It is common in therapy for these men for them to break down and cry, saying that they can’t control themselves. The behavior can go on for decades if it is not checked. The paraphilia is apparently learned. I believe it is hard to treat.
But yes, some voyeurs and exhibitionists do escalate, and these are the boundary pushers. You get away with flashing or peeping, and now you realize that you can get away with serious violations of people’s boundaries.
Although I believe Ted Bundy killed first at age 14 (a 9 year old girl neighbor), he would never confess to that crime, and they could never formally pin it on him. I also think he killed some women back East
when he stayed at a family home there over the summer. The record says he started killing in college. Anyway, the record is clear that in his teens, Ted used to roam neighborhoods at night, peeping on women. He also started breaking into homes around this time, often the homes of the women he was peeping on. Later on he went on some serious murder sprees.

How Criminal Escalation Works

In crime, when you get away with a crime for a while, there is tendency to think “If I got away with X, I can get away with X+1.” The people who think this way are not necessarily bad people per se. If they had never gotten away with X crime, they might have lived perfectly decent lives. But they got away with X crime, with caused them to escalate beyond X further and further, and at some point, they might commit homicide. And it is typically a male criminal who escalates like this.
 
 

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Pedophilia: Orientation or Paraphilia?

The best science indicates that pedophilia is probably best seen as an orientation and not a paraphilia. It acts more like an orientation than a paraphilia in some ways. True pedophiles can’t help it. And they can’t be cured. I have worked with a couple of pedophile clients, and I liked both of them a lot. Neither was offending with children. One worried so badly that he might hurt a child that he was suicidal. I thought he was a good person to care about others so much that he felt that way.
As long as they are not offending, I am ok with them. There are groups called Virtuous Pedophiles set up now of pedophiles who have pledged not to offend. This should be encouraged. The more we hate and threaten them, the more likely they are to offend.
Or we could just put them all on an island where everyone is over 18.
In a long-term study, 50% of released pedophiles were able to go 25 years without offending, so large numbers of them can keep from offending for a long time.
Adult pedophiles need to get with a kind therapist who can work closely with them to keep them from offending. Frequency of sessions could vary.
Anyway, 80% of child molesters aren’t even pedophiles at all. They’re just criminals. They’re not attracted to kids at all or no more so than any other man. They’re attracted to mature females for the most part.

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Schiz OCD Versus Psychosis: Differences and Interactions

Hassan Herrera: By saying “Anxiety processes can at times escalate all the way to psychosis.” You mean, for example a OCD’er getting through the fear of going psychotic can start experiencing psychotic symptoms coming out of the anxiety process? I catch sight of a post of you setting apart core process and where the symptoms come from. I hope i got myself across.

Never seen a case of Schiz OCD going all the way to psychosis, although I know a woman with schizophrenia and Schiz OCD in which the two sort of go together but not completely. She still has delusions that she does not doubt. She also hides symptoms a lot, which is very hard to figure out, though I can sometimes do it.
I don’t think the Schiz OCD went into the Schizophrenia, but the Schizophrenia dx obviously played into the Schiz OCD. It’s an extremely complex case. Never seen a case of Schiz OCD going all the way to psychosis, although I know a woman with schizophrenia and Schiz OCD in which the two sort of went together but not completely. She still has delusions that she does not doubt. She also hides symptoms a lot, which is very hard to figure out, though I can sometimes do it. I don’t think the Schiz OCD went into the Schizophrenia, but the Schizophrenia dx obviously played into the Schiz OCD. It’s an extremely complex case.
There is a Psychotic OCD but I have never seen a single case of it, and I have seen more OCD’ers than 95% of clinicians will ever see. I have seen cases that I worried were Psychotic OCD, but when you got it all untangled, they still had reality testing intact more or less, at least in terms of overvalued ideas. There is a sub-diagnosis of OCD with Overvalued Ideas.
The OCD symptoms in this case were extremely bizarre, and phenomenologically, they looked a lot like the sort of thing you see in Psychotic OCD. His symptoms appeared so psychotic that when I mentioned them to a retired clinician, she insisted that this person was psychotic and would not accept that they were not. Unfortunately I am not allowed to share the very interesting symptoms on here.
Psychotic OCD has a sort of a “look” to it along with typical delusions that are present in a lot of cases – it is a syndrome, in other words.
A classic case of Psychotic OCD would be a case where the obsessions have escalated into delusions. The people are typically not dangerous, as fear is a freezing agent, and OCD’ers tend to be shy or very shy, passive, introverted, and remarkably nonviolent. A classic case is a man sitting in a chair all day shaking like a leaf and going on about his obsessions, which have now reached delusional intensity. The old view was that Psychotic OCD’ers never got too far gone psychosis-wise, and it was quite easy to pull them out of the psychosis. A typical case might last three weeks.
However, we now have recent cases of Psychotic OCD going on for years that did not respond to treatment. Some responded to ERP oddly enough. Some of these people are so ill that they have become the homeless mentally ill like a lot of schizophrenics, carting their belongings around in a suitcase.
The main thing to note is that Psychotic OCD is rarely seen. However, when OCD is very bad, they can appear psychotic. Hence, OCD’ers are often misdiagnosed with psychosis of one form or another and put on antipsychotic drugs, which generally do not help them. I get clients all the time coming to me with a diagnosis of some form of psychosis. Once I figure out they are not psychotic and are usually instead Schiz OCD’ers with what I call fake delusions and fake hallucinations, I tell them to fire their psychiatrist and go doctor shopping until you find an MD who understands that you have OCD and not psychosis.
A lot of psychiatrists continue to misdiagnose OCD’ers with psychosis. The phenomenology of OCD is not understood well by many clinicians, and the fact that OCD when severe looks like psychosis but is not results in  a lot of misdiagnosis.
I think a Schiz OCD’er would be the last person to go psychotic, as the condition is predicated on continuous worry and doubt that they are going psychotic. If you have spent any time around psychotic people, that’s clearly not what’s going on. In psychosis the person never worries whether they are psychotic, nor are they are aware they are psychotic.
If you are worried about or are aware of being psychotic, then you cannot possibly be psychotic. That’s a rule out for psychosis right there. This is exactly what is going on in Schiz OCD, hence Schiz OCD is never psychotic by definition.

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Game/PUA: The Latest Insult: "You're an Incel!"

The latest idiotic Internet insult is “You’re an incel!” Even I am getting called an incel lately. That’s laughable because I am about as far from being an incel as a man gets.
There’s nothing new here. This bullshit has been going on forever now, and feminists have always specialized in the insult, “Obviously you can’t get laid!” It also takes other forms. “Neckbeard” means much the same thing. For some reason, it is always feminists and Cultural Left types who wield the “Obviously you can’t get laid”, neckbeard, and incel insults.
For some reason, rightwingers never say this. I suppose that’s because rightwingers don’t care whether some man gets women or not because after all, it’s not that important.
The stupid thing about this insult is that Cultural Left boneheads call every man they hate a neckbeard, incel, or insist, “Obviously you can’t get laid!” Of all the retarded things to say about a human being you don’t even know! Furthermore, this is always done on the Internet, when the Cultural Left types have never met the person and know nothing about him. They read his prose and decide he can’t get laid with God’s help!
I have been reading prose on the Internet for many years now. For the life of me, I have never run across male prose that indicates to me whether a man is successful with women or not. There is no “can’t get laid” style of writing. There’s no such thing! Unless the person is discussing sex, you have no idea if he’s a 50 year old incel or if he’s closing in on Wilt Chamberlain’s record.
Similarly, you can’t diagnose mental illness much less Asperger’s Syndrome on the Internet. I work in mental health. How the Hell can I look at someone’s prose or journalism on the Net and give them a DSM diagnosis? Yet every Cultural Left idiot on Earth can diagnose mental illness better than the finest clinicians – by merely reading a simple gleaning of someone’s prose! Such geniuses!
Of course Asperger’s Syndrome (the most overdiagnosed condition in history) cannot be diagnosed on the Net. Everybody thinks they can, and everyone is always diagnosing everyone else as an “Aspie.” It’s mostly Cultural Left types calling everyone they hate an Aspie. To say this isn’t very nice to Aspies is an understatement. But no clinician can possibly diagnose AS from a snippet of prose. How the Hell can Cultural Left scum outdiagnose the world’s finest diagnosticians?
This insult “Obviously you can’t get laid!” arises from the completely false feminist belief that all men who feminists consider to be misogynists (most of us) cannot possibly get laid. In other words, if you’re a misogynist, obviously you can’t get laid to save your life.
Now I have been observing the dating scene for decades, and one thing that is clear to me is that a lot of misogynistic men get tons of sex. Even the stereotypical bad boys who treat women like crap are well known to be drowning in pussy. Many though not all womanizers are definitely misogynists. The standard male advice about women, particularly from womanizers, is, “You gotta treat women like shit.” This is all pretty awful for those of us who want to be decent men because it seems like a requirement for a successful relationship with women is abusing them.
This goes along with the typical problem of nice guys, which feminists get all wrong.

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Tony Perkins Is an Anti-Gay Bigot, But a Lot of the Things He Says about Homosexuality Are True

I don’t have a high opinion of this reactionary idiot Tony Perkins. While the label of bigot and hater seems correct about him, unfortunately a number of things he says about homosexuality are flat out true. Others are ugly opinions, exaggerations, silliness, or untruths.
The dossier against Perkins can be found here at the site of one of the worst SJW organizations out there, the toxic and cancerous Southern Poverty Law Center. Let’s look at the charges:

contending that gay rights advocates intend to round up Christians in “boxcars.”

False. OK, that’s fanaticism.
But sometimes I wonder what sort of SJW dictatorship our SJW commissar overlords would have in store for us if they ever seized power. Looking at how hate-filled, vindictive, and out and out vicious your typical gay rights homosexual is nowadays, it’s not unreasonable to fear all sorts of bad things from these maniacs.
To give you an example, these gay activists absolutely hate me although I have supported gay rights since the 1980’s when it was dangerous to do so. That’s a good 35 years. And I work on their political campaigns, though I should probably quit based on how they treat me.
In order to be a proper gay rights ally and avoid being a homophobe, the goalposts have now been moved to positions that are so far beyond the endzone that most straight men would qualify as homophobes by default simply for having the normal opinions that straight men have towards male homosexuality (hint: they have a very low opinion of it).

“What most people either don’t realize or willfully ignore is that only 16 percent of Islam is a religion — the rest is a combination of military, judicial, economic, and political system. Christianity, by comparison, isn’t a judicial or economic code — but a faith. So to suggest that we would be imposing some sort of religious test on Muslims is inaccurate. Sharia is not a religion in the context of the First Amendment.”
— FRC email, December 2015

True. That’s probably about right, sorry.

“Those who practice Islam in its entirety, it’s not just a religion. It’s an economic system, it’s a judicial system, and it is a military – a military system. And it is – it has Shariah law that you’ve heard about and those things will tear and destroy the fabric of a democracy. So we have to be very clear about our laws and restrain those things that would harm the whole. We are a nation – let me be very clear about this. We are a nation that was founded on Judeo-Christian principles, that’s the foundation of our nation, not Islam, but the Judeo-Christian God.”
Washington Watch radio show, September 2014

Mostly true. He’s wrong as usual about the Founding Fathers, who were more deists than anything else, but this is standard fundie nonsense.
The rest about Islam is more or less 100% fact.

“The videos are titled ‘It Gets Better.’ They are aimed at persuading kids that although they’ll face struggles and perhaps bullying for ‘coming out’ as homosexual (or transgendered or some other perversion), life will get better. … It’s disgusting. And it’s part of a concerted effort to persuade kids that homosexuality is okay and actually to recruit them into that lifestyle.”
—FRC fundraising letter, August 2011

False. The It Gets Better videos are not part of a project to recruit kids into the gay lifestyle. I doubt if they are trying to tell kids homosexuality is ok either. These videos are aimed at gay teenagers who are distraught, depressed, and have a high attempted suicide rate, showing them that no matter how much they are suffering now, things will get better as they get older.
It’s probably not true that gays cannot turn straights gay, but many straight women have chosen a bisexual orientation, and many straight men have chosen to engage in bisexual behavior, with more and more doing this all the time. And while you can’t turn straight people gay, that doesn’t stop gay and bisexual men from trying.
I can’t count how many times they have tried to seduce me, and they’ve done it to a lot of my friends too. Actually bisexual men are far worse about this because I don’t have much to do with gay men, and bisexual men are everywhere running about in typical straight society. They can get pretty verbally coercive and cajoling about trying to get you to join in their faggy fun too. You need to stop talking to them because they will never stop trying to cajole you into their faggy fun and games.

“Those who understand the homosexual community – the activists – they’re very aggressive, they’re – everything they accuse us of they are in triplicate. They’re intolerant, they’re hateful, vile, they’re spiteful. …. To me, that is the height of hatred, to be silent when we know there are individuals that are engaged in activity, behavior, and an agenda that will destroy them and our nation.”
—Speaking to the Oak Initiative Summit, April 2011

True. This is actually true. Gay activists are out and out ugly. In fact, I am starting hate gay men (though I should not feel that way, I know) due to so many nasty and ugly interactions with them. I will continue to support them politically of course, but the less I deal with them otherwise, the better. Gay men nowadays are the worst SJW’s of them all, like SJW’s on steroids.
False. But I really doubt if homosexuality is going to destroy the country. That’s a bit much.

“While activists like to claim that pedophilia is a completely distinct orientation from homosexuality, evidence shows a disproportionate overlap between the two. … It is a homosexual problem.”
— FRC website, 2010

True. This is a bit vicious, but gay men are vastly overrepresented among pedophiles. 35% of child molestations are molestations of boys by men. Almost all of these men are homosexual pedophiles.
False. But saying that pedophilia is a gay problem is just wrong. And it’s vicious.

The marriage debate “is literally about the entire culture: it’s about the rule of law, it’s about the country, it’s about our future, it’s about redefining the curriculum in our schools, it’s about driving a wedge between parent and child, it’s about the loss of religious freedom, it’s about the inability to be who we are as a people.”
— The Janet Mefford Show, May 22, 2014

False. None of this is true, but I can see why these Christians are upset about it. They say it goes against their religion. Well, OK. So how do you expect them to act?

Part of the FRC’s strategy is to tout the false claim that gay men are more likely to sexually abuse children. The American Psychological Association, among others, has concluded that, “homosexual men are not more likely to sexually abuse children than heterosexual men are.”

True. Yes, and the APA is flat out wrong and is disregarding all of the evidence of psychological “science” on this issue. You wonder why people say the social science are not sciences. Well, look no further. Actually gay men are 12 times more likely to molest children than straight men are.
Nevertheless, most gay men are obviously not pedophiles.

As the show ended, Perkins stated, “If you look at the American College of Pediatricians, they say the research is overwhelming that homosexuality poses a danger to children.

False. I do not think it is fair to say that homosexuals pose a risk to our children. “Keep the faggots away from our kids!” seems like a mean and unnecessary thing to say.

In late 2010, Perkins held a webcast to discuss the dire consequences of allowing gay men and lesbians to serve openly in the military. Dubious statistics from a poll commissioned by the FRC and the Center for Security Policy – which was named an anti-Muslim hate group in 2015 – were used during the webcast.
The webcast also mentioned the FRC report, Mission Compromised, written by retired Army Lt. Col. Robert Maginnis, the FRC’s senior fellow for national security. The report contended that allowing gay men and lesbians to serve openly would undermine morale and discipline and infringe on the religious freedom of military chaplains, who would be forced to accept homosexuality and would no longer be permitted to express their religious beliefs about it.
In addition, Maginnis predicted that heterosexual service members would be forced to take “sensitivity classes” that promote the “homosexual lifestyle.” He added: “Homosexual activists seek to force the U.S. military to embrace their radical views and sexual conduct, no matter the consequences for combat effectiveness.”

False. I believe that gays are now serving openly in the US military, and this has not affected combat effectiveness like the howlers predicted.

On Oct. 11, 2010, The Washington Post published a commentary by Perkins in which he repeated his argument that anti-bullying policies are not really intended to protect students. “Homosexual activist groups like GLSEN [Gay, Lesbian and Straight Education Network] … are exploiting these tragedies to push their agenda of demanding not only tolerance of homosexual individuals, but active affirmation of homosexual conduct and their efforts to redefine the family.”

Half true. Sadly, this is correct. Gay activists are indeed using the anti-bullying push to promote tolerance of homosexuals, to redefine the family, and worse, to promote out and out affirmation of homosexuality.
In fact, I would argue that it goes far beyond that, and that presently gay rights activists are promoting the open celebration of homosexuality. As a straight man, I fail to see why I should jump up and down and cheer for homosexuality. What’s so great about it? Who needs it? If it disappeared from the planet tomorrow, would that be a bad thing? It probably would not, as homosexuality offers zero benefits to society while causing a long list of societal problems.
However, obviously the anti-bullying movement is also designed to protect gay students.

In 2013, Perkins claimed on CNN that allowing gay people into the Boy Scouts would put children in danger of sexual assault. When pressed by the CNN host, Perkins again resorted to the FRC’s stock claim, as Perkins once put it, that pedophilia “is a homosexual problem.” “They [Boy Scouts] are trying to create an environment that is protective of children,” he said. “This [allowing LGBT Scouts and Scout leaders] doesn’t make it more protective. There is a disproportionate number of male on boy – when we get on pedophilia, male on boy is a higher incident rate of that.”

True. Well, of course letting gay men by scoutmasters puts boys at increased risk of molestation. Isn’t that obvious? There have been plenty of closeted gay men who were scoutmasters in the past, and they molested more than a few boys. Why do you think the Scouts had the ban in the first place? Because this was a well known long-standing problem in scouting! It was hard enough to try to sort out the closet cases among the scoutmasters, and the new policy was going to flood scouts with a lot more gay scoutmasters. Just what the Scouts need.

Despite gains made for LGBT equality, Perkins and the FRC have continued their anti-gay activities, including opposition to the proposed Employment Non-Discrimination Act (ENDA). According to Perkins, President Obama was working with the “totalitarian homosexual lobby” to sneak ENDA into law and should that happen, freedom of religion will be “destroyed.”

Opinion. Well, you know, this is just wrong. In general, I think that it should be illegal to discriminate against homosexuals in housing, employment, etc. simply for being homosexuals.
But we ought to be able to discriminate on other grounds. For instance, suppose a flamboyantly gay man applies at my store to be a customer clerk. My clientele is mostly straight men, a lot of whom are macho rednecks who will not take kindly to a screaming faggot asking, “Can I help you?” In this case, I might be able to hire a gay man if he was straight acting and promised to be quiet about his orientation so as not to scare off my clientele.
Suppose you have a restaurant. The hosts are people who greet customers and show them their seats. I have a right to turn down a flamboyant homosexual who wants to work as a host because he will scare off my diners. Instead, I would happy to employ him in a backroom somewhere, but he can’t be out there greeting diners.
Other than these minor cases though, I think gays should have the same employment and housing rights as members of racial groups or the two genders.

Perkins also has worked to keep America safe from Betty Crocker. In September 2013, he called for a boycott of the iconic brand because General Mills, which produces it, donated custom cakes to three LGBT couples in Minnesota who were married after the state legalized same-sex marriage a month earlier.

Opinion. Wow. Ugly.

In 2015, as the FRC tilted into anti-Muslim sentiment – especially with the hiring of retired Lt. General William “Jerry” Boykin – Perkins said that Islam is such a danger that Muslim Americans should not have the same religious freedoms as other citizens.

Opinion. Not sure what he means by this, but this is ugly.

After a man with radical Islamic beliefs fatally shot 49 people at an Orlando LGBT nightclub in June 2016, Perkins pointed the finger at the Obama Administration – claiming that the administration marginalized Christians and elevated Islam. “We have to deal with the underlying issue, which is an ideology that’s incompatible with American liberty,” Perkins wrote. “An ideology, tragically, that this administration has empowered through its public policy and private diplomacy.”

False. Yuck. The problem here is that this attack had nothing to with Islam. The attacker himself was a gay man, so he was not killing gay men out of hatred or bigotry. Instead, he had had an affair with a Puerto Rican gay man who he met at that bar, and that man had given him HIV. This was a Puerto Rican gay bar. So he decided to take revenge against Puerto Rican gay men in general by shooting up the bar.

In a 2016 FRC email to followers about the issue, Perkins warned: “If government can force the ‘normalization’ or even the celebration of something as universally unnatural as men using women’s restrooms and vice versa, then it can force the rest of its agenda on the American people very easily,” resulting in “social chaos” and the breakdown of all “sexual inhibition and morality.”

False. I doubt if that’s going to happen, but at 60, I would love to see sexual inhibition and morality break down a lot more. Perhaps I would get more dates.

During 2016, Perkins was part of the Republican committee as a delegate from Louisiana that created the GOP platform.
Perkins reportedly proposed a plank that supported conversion therapy for minors, though the wording, apparently revised from the original, does not specifically mention conversion therapy – a pseudoscientific practice that claims to change a person’s sexual orientation from gay to straight, and has been denounced by every major U.S. medical and mental health association. The platform committee ultimately passed a resolution affirming “the right of parents to determine the proper treatment or therapy, for their minor children.”

Opinion. Conversion therapy is a controversial issue, and in general it does not seem to work, although it is proven that sex surrogacy can help some lesbians to enjoy sex with men.

After Trump’s election, the FRC and Perkins were heavily involved in the formation of policy for the new administration. FRC Senior Fellow Kenneth Blackwell was named the head of domestic policy for the transition team. The FRC also took steps to ensure the new administration would undo President Obama’s work advancing LGBT equality – efforts that come after Perkins’ June 2016 claim that a Trump presidency would be better for the LGBT community than a Hillary Clinton presidency.

Opinion. This sounds bad.

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The Importance of Anger as a Factor in Suicidal People

When anger is added to suicidality, i’s a bad thing. It’s a marker for actual attempts and especially completions.
I have had angry suicidal clients attempt suicide on me a few times in my work as a counselor. It’s unnerving to say the least. In fact, dealing with an actively suicidal client is very stressful. In the times when I did this, the suicidality of the client poured out and poured into me. It didn’t make me suicidal. Instead it just made me disturbed and upset. I was walking around for three weeks thinking of suicide, what it means, etc. The thought of it never much left my mind, so I was thinking about “the subject of suicide” most of the time.
It’s more creepy and unnerving than anything else. It didn’t make me depressed or suicidal. In fact, it was more the opposite, as when the issue is shoved in your face, you realize what a real deal big thing end of the road finality it really is. It shocks and repels you and makes you more opposed to it than you were before.
We don’t normally think about it, but when you have an important person in your life actively attempting suicide, you are forced to deal with the subject that we always evade.

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Borderlands: Obsession, Delusion and Their Differential Diagnosis

The Borderland between Obsession and Delusion

Anxiety processes can at times escalate all the way to psychosis. I have had some OCD clients who I had a very hard time figuring out if they were psychotic or not. With one, I told a retired therapist of their symptoms, and the therapist immediately said, “Well, they’re psychotic. That’s a delusion.” The things that they believed or almost believed did look like psychotic delusions. However, they did not entirely believe them. OCD with Overvalued Ideas was probably a better diagnosis. There are a few cases of Psychotic OCD. I have never seen one though, although this case was getting close.
When OCD gets very bad, they appear psychotic. However, they generally are not, and in 95% of cases, I can figure out that they are not psychotic. That is because Severe OCD That Looks Psychotic has this particular look, feel, or vibe (gestalt) about it where the cases all give off this particular vibe. It’s like they are all reading off the same script in a sense.

The Problem of Psychotic People Hiding Symptoms

You get a different look, feel, or vibe (gestalt) with an actively psychotic individual, but they can be hard to figure out too because sometimes they lie about their delusions.
I have caught them hiding symptoms from me.
Some people with psychoses learn to hide symptoms because they figure out that every time they say “The FBI is after me,” someone grabs them and hauls them off to the hospital. So they continue to believe the FBI is after them, but they learn to shut up about it.
You look at what the person is doing in reaction to the thoughts. They thought the neighbors were hacking into their computer so they disconnected their computer from the Internet? Delusion. A person who just had the fear or obsession that the neighbors were hacking in would not disconnect the computer, and their description of the fear would be full of all of these strange doubts and uncertainties.

The Difficulty of Differentiating between Thoughts and Voices

Psychotic people sometimes refer to thoughts as voices. I had one client who referred to thoughts telling him to do bad things, in this case, to kill animals. He had recently killed five puppies in response to these thoughts ordering him to kill these animals. I suspected these were more than thoughts, so I had him describe them, and he said, “It’s a thought, you know. You hear it like someone standing next to you and talking.” Ok if you hear it outside your body like that, it’s not a thought, it’s a voice.
Some people with schizophrenia hear their thoughts spoken out loud in the environment, and they fear or believe that others can hear their thoughts being broadcast out there. However, if you corner them on it, some will try to deny it by saying that they just have very loud thoughts in their heads, and the thoughts are so loud that they worry or fear that maybe others can hear them. That’s not quite precisely a delusion, and it’s not a hallucination like the thought broadcasting. It’s off into the obsession/delusion borderland.

Schiz OCD – OCD with the Fear of Psychosis Theme

There is a type of OCD where the person fears that they are going psychotic. OCD’ers have made up a term called Schiz OCD for this illness, which is really OCD with the Fear of Psychosis as the theme. Some clinicians have complained to me about these “hokey names” for the different OCD types and accused me of making them up. I didn’t make up any of them.
The sufferers make up these names for the different themes that they have. I feel that the sufferers have a right to own their symptoms and illnesses and call them whatever they want to call them. That’s their right as sufferers.
Who are we to tell them that their name for their symptoms is the wrong name? Do we have a better name? Of course not. “We” are just arrogant clinicians who think we know these illnesses better than the sufferers themselves know them. I realize Schiz OCD is a confusing name, but it’s the name they picked, and we don’t have a better one, so let’s go with it.
They develop all sorts of “psychotic” symptoms, including fake delusions, fake hallucinations, and even perceptual disturbances. Once again the Schiz OCD symptoms have a completely different quality – look, feel, vibe or gestalt – than you get with someone who has actual delusions and real hallucinations. In addition, all of the Schiz OCD symptoms have a very similar quality across many different people – once again, it’s like they are all reading off the same script.

The Problem of Misdiagnosis in Schiz OCD

I have now seen more people like this than I can count, and I’m an expert on this illness. But I still get people with this type of OCD coming to me all the time with diagnoses of various types of psychoses, schizophrenia, psychotic depression, etc. They received these diagnoses from qualified clinicians such as psychiatrists and clinical psychologists. They were misdiagnosed in 95% of cases, so you see even skilled clinicians can’t tell this OCD type from a psychosis in a lot of cases.

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Do Gay Men Ever Look at Women's Boobs?

Answered on Quora: 
You want to know the real answer, I mean the non-PC answer that you will never get on Quora?
Here it is.
Gay men don’t look at women’s tits. Like, never ever ever ever. When I say that, I mean they don’t look at them like we straight men do!
You know how women complain that when straight men talk to them they look at their tits instead of their eyes? The joke is that women say, “Hey, my eyes are up here,” pointing to their eyes, as in, my eyes are up on my head, not down among my tits. If a man is staring at your tits while you are talking to him, that’s a dead on clue you are talking to a straight man or at least a very strong bisexual because no gay man ever does that.
I know a woman whose breasts fell out of her blouse when she was with a man she was sort of dating. The guy acted like nothing had happened, as if her breasts were not even there. That is when she concluded, correctly in my opinion, that he was gay.
Let’s turn this question around. Do straight men ever stare at men’s cocks? Do we ever look at other men in a sexual way at all, I mean they way we look at women (we look at women like they are t-bone steaks, or at least I do)? Well, of course not. No straight man ever looks at another man that way.
I work as a counselor. In my practice, I have had several gay men. I often do a sexual orientation workup if it is called for. I ask my gay clients:
Do you ever talk about women the way straight men do?
Do you ever look at women, like check them out like straight men do?
Do you ever fantasize about women?
Do you ever masturbate and think about women?
So far, 100% of my gay clients have answered no to all of those questions.
These responses held all the way to 25–75 gay (75 being maximal attraction, 25 being a fraction of that).*
Gay men are not attracted to women at all, hence, they don’t stare at women’s tits they way we straight pigs do.
*100-0: Maximum heterosexual, minimum homosexual
90-10: Maximum heterosexual, incidental homosexual
80-20: Maximum heterosexual, significant homosexual
70-30: Maximum heterosexual, strong homosexual
60-40: Maximum heterosexual, very strong strong homosexual
50-50: Maximum heterosexual, maximal homosexual
40-60: Maximum homosexual, very strong heterosexual
30-70: Maximum homosexual, strong heterosexual
25-75: Maximum homosexual, significant heterosexual
20-80: Maximum homosexual, significant heterosexual
10-90: Maximum homosexual, incidental heterosexual
0-100: Maximum homosexual, minimal heterosexual

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Do Therapists Ever Think Their Clients are Unfixable?

Question from Quora:
Some people are utterly unfixable or even improvable, but they are quite rare.
There are clients who are just too far gone, and they cannot be helped at all. It is as if the person were a ceramic bowl that was dropped on a hard floor. The bowl is now in 100 pieces, and the person who dropped it is on the ground looking at the pieces and throwing up their hands. “Where do I start?” he asks in exasperation.
All sociopaths and psychopaths are unfixable by their very nature. We can’t cure the sociopathy and psychopathy because they don’t want to get better. They enjoy being antisocial, and they do not wish to change. However, we can get them to change their behavior. For instance, a homicidal sociopath may show up in the office. A good therapist may be able to convince this sociopath that acting on their homicidal fantasies would be one of the stupidest things that they could ever do. This sociopath may then be able to go through life without killing an innocent person. So we can’t fix sociopaths, but we can change their behavior somewhat, tone it down, or reduce the amount of damage they do to society.
All paraphilias are unfixable by their very nature. The paraphilia quite literally will not and cannot go away. It’s etched in stone.
Schizophrenia is largely unfixable. They need a great deal of medication, and even then in most cases, they are repeatedly hospitalized. A few can go on to lead somewhat normal or even successful lives, but these people still need continuous medication and regular psychotherapy. In addition, they need frequent interventions to stay out of the hospital.
Many illnesses such as OCD, Bipolar Disorder and Chronic Major Depression are unfixable by psychotherapy. Most of these people will need medication for the rest of their lives. However, psychotherapy can improve their conditions a lot at least in the first and last cases.
Long-term suicidality is very hard to fix. It tends to become chronic with repeated attempts over the years. The suicidal person is typically defiant and is furious with you for challenging their suicidality. You are expected to sympathize with their condition, which is actually a very bad idea. Most suicidal people are what I would call “defiantly suicidal.”
Personality disorders are generally incurable. Theoretically, they could be fixed, but these people almost never present for therapy, and when they do, it is often at the behest of others, and they do not really wish to be there or get anything done. People with personality disorders, like sociopaths, literally do not want to get better. They like their personality disorder, and they are incredibly resistant to change. There are some case reports of cures of personality disorders, but in general the prognosis is grave.
I have never been able to fix long term low self esteem, and I have tried with a few people. There is something about that condition that hammers itself into the brain as if into concrete. I do not know why, but long-term low self-esteem seems to be one of the hardest psychological problems to fix. Why this is, I have no idea. Perhaps someone else can offer some ideas.
In many cases, long-term mental disorders simply cannot be fixed or cured. However, with psychotherapy and drugs, people can often get much better than they were before. We need to stop thinking in terms of cures and start thinking in terms of amelioration.
I realize that many clinicians insist that most people can be fixed or cured of long-term conditions, but I think they are lying. They are probably trying to drum up business. Many clinicians fear that if word got out that a lot of long-term mentally ill people cannot be fixed or cured, people would stop coming in for therapy. There goes their paycheck. Therapists are a lot more money-oriented than most people believe, and don’t let anyone tell you otherwise. I know this field very well.
Clinicians have nothing to worry about. Even if a lot of conditions could only be ameliorated and not fixed, I am sure a lot of folks would show up to try to get some improvement. Some mental disorders are so painful that any improvement feels like a miracle cure to the client. A lot of people have given up on being cured anyway, just want to at least get better and are quite happy to do so.

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The Untreatable Borderline Personality Disorder Client: A Therapeutic Nightmare

Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD)is one of the hardest disorders of all to treat. It can be improved with some therapies, but the road is long and hard. Many seem to go on for years or decades with little or no improvement. There are reports of cures, and I am familiar with a woman whose BPD cleared up at age 55 after having come on in childhood. That’s probably a typical cure. Decades of nasty illness followed by a lifting of the illness in middle age.
Many mental disorders improve in middle age, and even many personality disorders improve during this age period.
Schizophrenia often ‘burns out” in middle age, and florid positive symptoms are replaced by more negative symptoms.
Many anxiety disorders attentuate in middle age.
Even psychopaths often get better or at least less destructive in middle age, as many of them also burn out in a similar fashion as schizophrenics. A number of highly antisocial psychopathic men get better in middle age as the antisocial behavior attentuates. It is often replaced by depression, heavy drinking and a pessimistic, cynical, imbittered and misanthropic person who nonetheless does little damage to society anymore.
It should be noted the clients with BPD vary widely in their symptom pathology.  Some are much more functional than others. Quite a few can even function well at their jobs all day, but when they come home from work, they fall apart and shift into full BPD pathology.
However, some people with BPD are so ill that they seem nearly untreatable. It is these people who will be the subject of this post, not BPD’s in general. These people seem so far gone and broken that one wonders how anyone could ever even begin to put them back together again. I suppose some progress could be made, but the damage is so severe that I have a hard time seeing how even the best therapist could possibly fix these people in any significant way.
A typical case might be a young woman who, only in her late 20’s to early 30’s, already has 8 -13 suicide attempts and many hospitalizations behind her. She goes into the hospital on a regular basis. Therapy seems to do nothing but feed her pathology as she manipulates gullible new therapists to believe her lies, nonsense, and projections as the new therapist confuses symptom pathology with the truth. Drugs do almost nothing.
Diagnosis itself is often difficult because the BPD is so severe that the person often appears psychotic/delusional. One wonders what are delusions and what are not. Even the delusions do not seem to last for long, as they are dropped, changed around, added to or substituted in a wildly chaotic fashion.
Usually there is a lot of combativeness and involvement with the court system, as the extreme rage leads a litigious person.
Splitting is severe and textbook.
Self-image is so unstable that the person almost literally adopts the full personality and even persona of whomever is on their radar at the moment. The clinician needs to be prepared that this person will so identify with the clinician that they will adopt the therapist’s image and persona as their own. Boundaries nearly do not exist for these people, and they often fall in love with their therapists, try to seduce them, or on the other hand become furious at them to where sessions became rage attacks at the therapist, and the therapists is at odds of how to respond without violating ethics.
The client can become overtly suicidal even during sessions, and infatuation with the therapist can quickly split to where the therapist is the source of all evil. Homicidal threats and homicidal-suicidal threats against the therapist may now appear. The client then hospitalizes themselves due the “horrible trauma from the evil,  incompetent therapist” and soon finds sympathetic new therapist, typically a feminist woman, to unload her story on. The new female therapist forms an alliance with the client against the “evil male” former therapist and accuses him of damaging the client.
Commonly, the therapist gets angry and tells off the client. This leads to abandonment and a vengeance agenda against the therapist, who has now “irreparably damaged” the BPD and “caused them to spiral out of control.” Be prepared to get accused of abandonment, causing severe trauma in the client and making them dramatically worse. The client may become hospitalized due to allegations of damage from an incompetent therapist.
These people are so difficult and chaotic that many clinicians refuse to see Borderline patients. Some are on the record as saying that when they say a Borderline client coming their way, they hide under their desk until they go away. For a lot of therapists, these clients are nothing but trouble, and endless parade of drama and chaos. Therapy itself is chaotic, mercurial, and wild with severe splitting and often extreme idealization of the therapist for good or ill or both, interrupted by fairly regular hospitalizations. The therapist begins to wonder what’s in it for them and thinks you could not pay them enough to suffer through such clients. These clients make an excellent argument that therapeutic abandonment is the proper choice with some clients.

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Do Psychologists Make Their Patients Aware of the Diagnosis of Narcissistic Personality Disorder or Sociopathy?

I recently answered this question on Quora.

Do Psychologists Make their Patients Aware of the Diagnosis of Narcissistic Personality Disorder or Sociopathy?

These personality disorders seem to carry a lot of social stigma, therefore are patients made aware of their diagnosis or does the therapist just continue behavioral therapy to treat the symptoms rather than informing them of the diagnosis?

I am not a psychologist. I am a counselor. I only work with one disorder, OCD, and I can quite accurately diagnose that condition, I assure you. Nevertheless, I am not allowed to give out legal DSM diagnoses. However, I can obviously give out my opinion on a diagnosis. I can also tell the person my opinion on what they do not have. For instance, I have gotten many clients with OCD who have been misdiagnosed with some sort of psychosis. I am an expert at telling the two apart. I simply tell them that in my opinion, they are not psychotic. Then I tell them to fire your clinician and go get a new one that will recognize the difference between OCD and psychosis (many clinicians are very poor at telling these apart).
Other than OCD/psychosis, I also have to make differential dx on OCD/sociopathy, violent thoughts, etc., OCD/pedophilia, pedophilic thoughts, etc. and OCD/homosexuality. In a limited number of cases, I told clients that in my opinion, they did not have OCD but instead had some psychotic disorder, or sociopathic traits, or pedophilia, or that they were homosexuals. Most of this differential dx is pretty straightforward.
I have never had any narcissistic clients, God forbid clients with NPD. One thing nice about working with OCD clients is that they are usually very nice people. Not all of them, mind you. But if they are not nice, there is often some other reason, for instance, Borderline Personality Disorder in an OCD client could possibly make them impossibly vicious, cruel, unstable, not to mention extremely crazy, far crazier than any OCD sufferer ever gets.
OCD by its very nature strikes nice people. The fact that they are so nice, meek and kind is actually one of the main reasons that they have the disorder in the first place! For the most part, only nice people get it, and the nicer you are, the more likely you are to get it. I will leave it at that for the moment and give you a chance to think of why that might be. I know why but it goes beyond the scope of this post at the moment.
But in general, I never even give my opinion on other anxiety disorders or on any mood disorders or personality disorders. I only rarely see clients who have psychotic disorders, and the two that I have seen were already diagnosed. I also very rarely see people with personality disorders, and the few that I have seen were all females with Borderline PD diagnoses. I did see one woman for two sessions with obvious Borderline Personality Disorder, but I had not figured it out yet in the first session, and by the second session, I declined to diagnose her. She has already been diagnosed by a psychiatrist from afar anyway. So apparently I am guilty of failing to dx a Borderline PD client.
The session was about her OCD, not her BPD and she was very nice through the whole session. It would have ruined the whole thing if I told her she had BPD, and I doubt if she would have accepted it anyway. At any rate, I am not allowed to give legal dx’s anyway, so it’s apparently proper for me not to diagnose someone!
That only comes up if there is differential diagnosis. I simply say that I not only can I not legally give these out but that I am not qualified to work with any condition other than OCD, which I can actually work very well with. If they want me to work on their depression or whatever, I tell them that I have no expertise or training in that area so I can guarantee nothing and it would be similar to talking to a friend or family member.
If I were able to give out diagnoses, I think I would simply give them out in most every case. Possibly if it might make a suicidal patient go over the edge, I might decline to give one out. But I will disagree with the clinicians below. In my opinion, physicians and other medical professionals in addition to all licensed clinicians should give out whatever diagnosis is appropriate. I feel it is a moral matter. The patient or client is simply owed a diagnosis on the part of the clinician or MD and I feel it would be remiss of the clinician or MD not to tell the patient what is wrong with them, and I mean everything that is wrong with them.
This is just my personal opinion and I believe there no ethical rules on the subject. Also I respect the clinicians below for not giving out diagnoses in cases where it would not be helpful. I simply feel that this is a case were morals or even the categorical imperative trumps pragmatics or even common sense.

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What Have You Learned from Self-Expression, Whether Chosen by You or Imposed upon You?

ZE: What have you learned from self-expression, whether chosen by you or imposed upon you?

It was better when I chose it.
When it was imposed on me, I often did not enjoy it and felt I had been taken prisoner, often by a hostile force.
These questions are hard to answer, as I bottle stuff up inside. Even people like me feel emotion, but we feel it in our minds more than in our bodies.
My theory is that running from your feelings is the problem. I work in mental health, and increasingly I tell my clients to just accept their feelings and quit trying to run from them. If you feel sad, say, “Thank God for that feeling!” and sit there and be with it. The universe is about 1/2 sadness, and that’s on a good day! You may as well sit down and be alone with the sadness of life and the world, which is quite ample. Just be OK with it. Life is sad. That’s fine. That’s part of the experience of being here.
People panic when they are sad. My best friend is a young woman. She calls me up panicked that she is feeling sad, as if it is a terrible thing. So she wants to run from it. But that doesn’t seem to work.
Say I had a client who was in a bad marriage and getting ready to leave his wife. He feels guilty for being a bad father, for leaving his son, for all sorts of things. Normally therapists will tell you to stop thinking that, as it is irrational, but the thing is, you tell people that, and they are going to go ahead and feel it anyway. So I tell would him to just sit there and be OK with those feelings.
I would say, “Well there is a part of you that feels a need to have these feelings. Just sit there and have those feelings and be OK with them. I think after some time, you will get these feelings out of your system, and you might even get sick of them. I don’t want you to feel this way for too long – say five years would be too long – but you need to feel this way for so me time – even up to one to four years I would be OK with you just experiencing that as part of the process and then finally moving on.”
But the role of originality in creativity, I would say that to some extent they are one and the same. But the original thought is more your own as opposed something truly sui generis. And you borrow all the original thoughts you want to. And while you’re at it, you can borrow all the creativity you want to also. You don’t even have to pay to rent or buy ideas, concepts, metaphors, turns or phrase, figures of speech or even jokes and laugh lines. Just go ahead and steal em.
Come on, just do it! Look around, make sure no one is looking, and nab that cute turn of phrase. Stick it in your pocket real fast before the Thought Police can figure out what you did. Now move away quickly and stash that fancy little phrase in some safe place wherever you store your stolen verbal material. I would suggest a locked briefcase. You can try to put them in your mind, but lately just about everything I store up there seems to get lost somehow, but that might not be a good idea.
You can’t copyright words! Or phrases! Or even sentences, really. You certainly cannot copyright or patent concepts, ideas, theories or notions. It’s all up for grabs. I assume that the capitalists are going to try to figure out a way to copyright or patent all this stuff just so the sick fucks can make a buck off it, but in the meantime, it’s mostly up for grabs.
Plagiarism is not illegal, but it’s a career killer. I would advise to tread cautiously, but trust me, we writers steal stuff all the time. You have to be very careful how you do it, and when it comes to famous or popular works, you just steal a tiny bit here and there, better yet completely unconsciously.
We all gather information from everywhere all the time. We do not have to go around crediting everyone we grabbed some idea from. I sure as Hell don’t.
Incidentally this is part of creativity and originality. Grabbing stuff from other people. Look, there are not a whole lot of new ideas floating around. Humans have been thinking, talking and especially writing stuff down for 2,000 years. Hence almost all creativity, even most originality, is more or less rehash, but that’s the whole idea of it really. Just don’t steal too brazenly and you’ll be fine.
The truly great thinker is running about grabbing great ideas from as many people as possible in as many places as he can. He can then elaborate on them if he wishes or squirrel them away in which case, as long as he can recall them, he can rehash them, add or subtract to them, mix them with other ideas in all sorts of ways or combine them with other ideas to form new theories, patterns, ways of seeing, conceptualizations and especially overarching pattern-theories, which I call “putting it all together” and “seeing the big picture.”
Otherwise known as “wisdom.”

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The Problem of Overdiagnosis in Mental Health

Zed: Most of psychology is whack bullshit considering the Jewish involvement. As many Jews are in medical field, they coin new terms to swindle money. While I am not calling entire psychology bullshit, it’s being stretched to include even normal behaviors. Lots of people are scared that normal behaviour like anger, happiness, crying would be branded as some kind of disorders. I looked up on it. There are many people I could identify as having passive aggression with its definition. It hardly matters, as they appear normal, and to brand them as some kind of mentally ill is a Jewish ploy. What have Jews called their pet groids who’re almost symbolic with destruction? Nothing!! That’s Jew psychopathy for you.

I guess I will have to disagree with you there.
If your personality seems normal to most everyone else, and if it is not ruining your life, we would say it’s not pathological. Only 14% of Americans have a personality disorder. That’s only one in seven. I work in the field though, and I have been studying psychology most via auto-didact for most of my life, and now I actually work as a psychological counselor. The more I work in this field, the more I think that in general, the field is onto something.
There is a lot of misdiagnosis around. I’ve been diagnosed psychotic a number of times by clinicians. That’s all wrong. I’ve never been psychotic a day in my life except when Trash drove me insane.
I received a diagnosis of Depression just the other day, and I think it’s wrong.
This same guy also insisted that I was either psychotic or used to be solely on the basis that I use marijuana. Last time I used it was 3 1/2 years ago, but no matter. Everyone who smokes pot is delusional according to this guy.
I was also recently diagnosed with “narcissism” but he said I did not meet criteria for Narcissistic Personality Disorder, thank God. I despise narcissists, so I contacted my favorite old therapist who I have not seen in 10+ years. He told me that I was not a narcissist. He said that instead I had something called “high self-esteem.” He said high self-esteem is often confused with narcissism, but it’s not the same thing.
In my own practice, I try very hard to avoid Diagnosis Creep. I think we should diagnose people with the absolute minimal number of disorders. A lot of times, someone will meet partial criteria for a couple of disorders, but we can’t give them full diagnosis. I have met partial criteria for GAD and Panic Disorder before, but I doubt if I meet any of those criteria now. If you want to check partial criteria, you will get a lot more people, but those are not full disorders. Diagnosing someone with a mental disorder is pretty serious business. I think we should do so as sparingly as possible.
For instance, of course passive aggression is everywhere. I have been accused of it myself. But in my entire life, I have only met one person who I felt actually met criteria for Passive Aggressive Personality Disorder. His personality is seriously screwed up by this problem, and it makes him a very annoying person to be around. He’s simply not normal. Not only is he passive aggressive, but his PA is so extreme that in my opinion it demands to be called some sort of mental disorder. I would very much object to the idea that this man’s behavior is normal or healthy at all. God forbid that it might become more common.
I would agree with you though that overdiagnosis is a very serious problem in the biz. Sometimes I wonder how much of it is money-driven. There is a tendency of clinicians to look at people, especially clients, as being much more ill than they really are. Their limits on normal behavior are quite ridiculous in my opinion. When you walk in that room, you’re the Sick One, and they are the Healthy One or the Sane One.
As a peer counselor, I try to get away from all that. The first thing I assure my clients is that I’m nuts too! I usually point out that I’m not nearly as nuts as they are (I don’t put it that way usually), but I was at some point, and if I got this much better, they can too! When they go down the list of their symptoms, I often tell them that I have experienced such symptoms myself, but that was a long time ago, or that I used to feel that way a lot, but I worked my way out of it, as I found that that was not a healthy way to walk through life. My basic attitude is, “I’ve been there too.”
In fact I am so sick and tired of playing the Sick Role while the clinician plays the Sane Role or Healthy Role that I have not been in therapy for a few years now. I’m graduated anyway. They told me I’m well enough that they don’t need to see me anymore anyway. I was on the state’s dime, so my care can be rationed which is fine with me.

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Thank God for That Feeling!

Really the optimistic and pessimistic views of life are both true and equally valid. This is what you figure out if you understand the Tao. Pessimism is a part of optimism and vice versa. Most of the time, it is the best of days and the worst of days, both at the same time. And that’s ok. That’s the Tao. The circle is completed. Once you realize that life is both wondrous and utterly horrible, often both at the same time, you feel greatly liberated and you no longer fear sadness or depression.
The main problem is that we are always trying to run away from our feelings. We have bad feelings and we run around like our the back of our shirt is on fire trying to toss of the flames of hell in our minds. This problem is compounded by therapists who too often try to get clients to stop thinking bad feelings and feel good ones instead. Problem is this does not really work. Say your marriage is breaking up. Even if you were in an abusive marriage, it’s still sad. And many people mourn the death of their marriage.
Usually a therapist will urge the client to not feel that way and instead be happy that the marriage is over. This is useless because the person is going to feel sad and mourn anyway. Clients should be encouraged to experience their bad feelings. Just sit and be alone with them. Meditate on them. If you are alone with your bad feelings for a while, often you get tired of bored with them and you don’t want to feel that way anymore. What really happened is you got the sadness or mourning  out of your system. If you run from it forever, you never get it out of your system. You have to stop running some time. And when you stop, here come your bad feelings, coming right up behind you. No matter how fast you run,  your feelings will always catch up to you.
Just as it is axiomatic that  you cannot run from your fears, similarly I doubt if you can run from your feelings. Feelings need to be allowed to come into consciousness, accepted and processed. After a bit of that, you may get tired of them, and now it is time to move along.
I have clients that are often dealing with a lot of unhappiness. I deal with suicidal people all the time. I have had clients attempt suicide on me right in the middle of a counseling stretch. I have already lost one client to suicide, but he was deeply depressed, had already attempted several times before, and when I first talked to him, he told me had a “suicide machine.” He had rigged up some sort of a device to give himself helium in order to commit suicide. Problem was it did not work very well.
The NHS in the UK really killed this man because they freaked out unnecessarily about his symptoms which sent him into a suicidal tizzy. He went away for a while and a few months later, I heard that three weeks after our last session, he was swinging from the ceiling of his home.
Increasingly I tell my clients who are dealing with sadness, depression and bad feelings  to just go ahead and experience that feeling. I say, “If  you feel sad, say ‘Thank God for that feeling!'” and you can go sit down somewhere and just get into the sadness of life, which is about 50% of it anyway. It is a legitimate part of life and it is ok to experience it without fear. The real problem is that people feel sad and start getting frantic trying to make the feeling go away. Go ahead and experience your feelings. They won’t bite. They’re yours. There’s no point running away from them if they’re yours.

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About My Employment Status

I am sort of getting tired of answering questions about my employment that I get from haters every day. Here is a statement on the matter from another site a while back.

I live off a trust fund, and I also work as a therapist. I make some money writing and I do a few other things like brokering deals between consultants and clients, things like that. The reason I do not work is due to health. I am not in good enough health to work. Otherwise I have been working or in school my whole life. My last job title was Linguist/Cultural Anthropologist.

I do not use any government programs, so I am mystified at people always saying I am on welfare or collect a government check. I have no idea where they came up with that idea.
Here are my income sources in the last year or so:

Income Sources

Trust fund. Had $700,000 at the start, but now it is a lot less. It is a spendthrift trust, so I am locked out of it. They have always given me right around a poverty level wage only because my grandfather wanted me to survive but he also wanted to force me to work, so he made it small enough so I could survive but would not live comfortably. The idea was to force me to work because he did not want me kicking back my whole life as a trust fund kid. It was made spendthrift because he figured that if I had control over it, I would blow through the thing in a few years as I was a bit of a spendthrift, party boy and playboy as a young man.
Counseling. Peer counselor. I focus mostly on one condition, a DSM anxiety disorder, which, frankly, I am an expert on. I work with clients all over the world, mostly in the US but also in Chile, El Salvador, Canada, Australia, the UK, Ireland, Germany, Norway, Sweden, the Netherlands, Spain, and Switzerland. I also work with problems in living, deep stuff (exploring your deep self or childhood issues) and growth stuff (learning how to grow to become a better and more functional human being).
People often break down in tears and start crying right in the middle of sessions. Happens all the time. I deal with suicidal people all the time. In fact, I lost one client to suicide already. I have had clients who were attempting suicide while I was working with them. It can be hard to deal with. I have no degrees, credentials or licenses in this field, but in California, you do not need one. Just hang out your shingle and call yourself “Counselor” and say come talk  to me about your problems. I do not get a lot of business, but I do get some. Considering that I lack all of the things you usually need to do this work, I am amazed that I get any work at all.
I read a lot of books on this subject and I have been studying psychology for 40 years. I had decades of therapy. I read up on counseling psychology and mental illness all the time so I am pretty much self-taught. You would be amazed how many jobs you can do simply by teaching yourself how to do them. It’s a myth that you need degrees, credentials,. etc. to do this or that job. Just teach yourself.
The longer I do this, the better I get at it. It is a stressful job though. I do one 1 hour session and I feel like I just ran a mile. I sometimes have to go lie down. The clients are in so much psychic pain that it seems to leak out of them and into my body. If you are empathetic at all this is going to happen.
Brokering deals between graphic artists and clients. I put the clients and artists together, negotiate prices, etc. and then take a cut for myself.
Conflict resolution/arbitration. In cases of graphic artists and clients where they have come to a standstill and nothing is getting done. An example: client has spent $~1,000 and is not satisfied with the product. Artist has stopped speaking to the client or returning his phone calls or emails. Client sent work back for endless revisions, and eventually the artist just had it. I wade in there, talk to both sides, figure out the nature of the dispute and try to settle the matter so that everyone is happy. I am actually quite good at this.
Webpage design/graphics. Mostly graphics. Working with graphics for people who need websites done. Work with graphic artists.
Graphics editor for books. I was recently a graphics editor for a book. I was in charge of maps. I worked with a graphic artist and told him what to label the areas and where to  shade in the areas we needed to shade in. We used a lot of sources, all of which were wrong. It was a great big mess,  but it was fun to put together the jigsaw puzzle.
Webpage design consulting. Consult with webpage designers who are having problems with their pages to fix their issues.
Selling information. As crazy as it sounds, I have actually made money doing that. I have some pretty much secret information about a few things that a lot of people want but few people have access to. An example would be a geographical location of an  unusual place that a lot of people want to get to, but the location is a closely guarded secret. So I ell directions to this location and then work with them afterwards to help them reach the site, etc. Yes, you can actually sell information! Isn’t that crazy?
Medical counseling. Work with heterosexual men who are worried that they have contracted HIV from sexual contact with women. I am an expert on this type of transmission and have been studying it for over 30 years now. I know more about it than most physicians.
They tell me the situation, and I lay out the odds that they may have contracted the disease based on their situation. I also tell them how HIV is acquired from women and tell them about the various surveys that have been done. I also have a lot of percentages, facts and figures about this type of transmission, like say 1% chance after 40 encounters. I tell them about all the different types of testing, the accuracy, etc. Then I follow them through any tests that they need to take in the next few months. And if they have anxiety or obsessive issues about possibly contracting this illness, I work with them on that, as I am very good at calming down or talking down people who are in the midst of anxiety episodes. I do it all the time.
Author. Just published my first book, or chapter in a book I should say. It is an 80 page chapter. I am supposed to be paid for this at some point. Book was published in Turkey in a university press. Took me 500 hours or three months work at part time. I worked with professors from all over the world on this project. I also had to go through two rather brutal peer reviews. I also came up with the name for this book series, but I was not paid for that.
Sell advertisements. I have made a bit of money selling ads on this site, but honestly it has been very little.
That’s it. I am always looking for new ways to get money though. I wake up every morning and think, “How am I going to get some money today?”
I became ill 21 years ago and have not worked at a regular job since. If I did not have the trust, I would try for Disability. Before I got ill, I was always either working or in college or both. There was never a time when I was doing neither.
If you enjoy the hard work that goes into this website, please consider a contribution to support the continuation of the site. Donations are the only thing that keep the site operating.

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Paybacks Are a Bitch

Serves him right.
Karma, paybacks, etc. are just basic physics, Newton’s Third Law in action. Let’s face it. This punk got it because of a universal law about the universe. Not a crackpot notion, not even a theory, but a damned law. Try avoiding some of the laws of the universe. You can’t. Mother Nature always bats last.
One thing that I often tell my counseling clients is that you cannot run from your fears because that is exactly what most all of them are doing. And in a similar way, I have a feeling that it is often pretty useless to try to hide, avoid or run away from your karma. Your fears, like your karma, always catch up to in the end no matter how fast you run. We have to face our karma whether we want to or not. It’s like the Day of Reckoning that’s always looming outside your door, rain or shine, day in and day out until the end. And you can’t stay inside forever.
Instant karma’s going get you, Dylan. It’s going to knock you right in the face!

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In Praise of Eccentricity

Found on the Net:

Weeks’ aim is to encourage the acceptance and cultivation of eccentricity in society, he said, and where necessary, he also hopes to familiarize mental health workers with eccentricity as a condition distinct from mental illness. This new understanding, he believes, will prevent patients from being wrongfully committed to mental hospitals when they are simply eccentric (an infrequent but not unheard-of scenario, Weeks said).
While eccentrics may exhibit one or two symptoms that are consistent with mental illness, they retain a hold on reality and have insight into their own behavior, he said. The psychologist has identified 20 traits indicating that a person may be eccentric.

A much-needed turnaround. Ever read the psychiatric literature, especially the older stuff from say the 1930’s? I am reading some right now. Check out the case studies. Damn those guys had some rigid ideas about how a healthy person should live their life. I think the mental health field needs to get away from microscopically examining everyone to look for hidden signs of maladaptive or unhealthy behavior, poor adjustment, oddness, or just not doing what you’re supposed to do, whatever the Hell that might be.
We should be looking at people for signs of healthy and adaptive behavior, good adjustment at least in some areas and and overall functionality. If can function pretty well, you can’t be all that nuts. Wouldn’t that be cool? Instead of getting out the DSM whenever anyone shows up, we should have a Mental Health Manual where we go down and check lists of healthy and adaptive behaviors, decent adjustment and especially ability to function decently in society. We could give people mental health diagnoses instead of mental illness diagnoses. That would be so boss!
Eccentricity means different things. If a Normie ever calls you eccentric, watch out. They will say it as they shake their head fatalistically or frown dismissively.
They mean you are nuts, and they think that sucks. And that you suck, sort of.
I am not sure if they mean you are really nuts. Normies aren’t all idiots. Normies are assholes, but they’re not necessarily dumb. They might mean that you are not nuts enough to be seriously crazy, and you might still be able to function pretty well in some areas, but you’re definitely not normal at all. You’re weird. You’re odd. You’re strange. And there’s nothing a Normie hates worse.
If any Normie ever insults you like that, just end the damn friendship right there. I am serious. They’re never going to like you. Not ever. It’s dead, Jim. Sure, you can stay friends with them, but they will be frenemies, and the friendship will suck. I have had scores of sucky friendships. The Hell with it. I’d rather be alone. At least when I’m alone, I’m hanging around with someone who likes me.
There are other people who are ok with eccentricity, and they may even cultivate it themselves. I have had some girlfriends tell me that I’m eccentric, but they were crazy in love with me at the time, so it wasn’t an insult. Usually someone who doesn’t mind your eccentricity is at least a little that way themselves. They are often in the arts somehow – artists, writers, dancers, musicians, actors – if only as fans, hangers on or hobbyists. In the arts, eccentricity is often a cultivated and desired state. When an artist calls you eccentric, that’s probably a compliment!
Anyway, I would like to see more tolerance for eccentricity in society and I hope people would quit calling eccentrics crazy. I know they won’t. but one can always hope. And of course clinicians should learn what’s non-pathological eccentricity and what’s pathological mental disorder. And if you’re eccentric, and you can’t seem to figure out how to not be eccentric no matter how hard you try (my boat), you really need to embrace it and quit beating yourself up. Quit calling yourself weird, nuts, crazy, strange, odd or disturbed. You’re none of those things. Accept your eccentricity as you accept any other things about yourself and embrace and incorporate it into your identity in a positive way.

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Unconditional Positive Regard in Anthropology and Psychology

William writes:

I suspect it has to do with Robert’s Anthropologist-ish background, it seems like you guys have a deep respect for basically any people capable of civilization at all/ have a deeper appreciation for it.

Correct, I have worked as a Cultural Anthropologist. I sort of fake my way into most of my jobs – I get a bunch of books on how to do it read them or I call up people who work in the field and ask them how to do the job. Then just go be an impostor. I remember when I boned up for the job, the books I read said that if you were going to be an anthropologist and work with an ethnic group, one thing you had to do was to accept the ethnic group in toto, and that meant you had to accept every single one of their behaviors and cultural practices. That’s the only way to do ethnographic work.
If you dislike some of the group’s beliefs, behaviors or practices, it can show up in your work with your informants, and if you don’t have a good relationship with your informants, you can’t get any good anthropological work done at all. Your informants will lie, play tricks on you, make up jokes about what they believe and do and all sorts of nonsense. Or they will just become hostile and refuse to cooperate much at all.
It’s sort an unconditional positive regard thing, a Rogersian way of doing anthropology.
Speaking of which, I also work in mental health, and I believe in Rogers’ Unconditional Positive Regard model here too. Too many therapists don’t, and I believe as a result, they do lousy therapy. I accept all of my clients in toto and generally don’t have any negative attitudes about any of them. Of course it helps that most of my clients are very good people. I don’t have to work with lousy or bad people as clients. I guess it’s difficult.
Also I am still a liberal at heart. That never left me. If your heart is still on the Left, it’s hard to get all that racist no matter how awful X group or race acts. Though Gypsies would definitely try my patience!

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A Bit About Paranoid Schizophrenia, with a Real Life Example

If you were going psychotic and hearing voices, you would not even know they were voices. When you first heard them, if you were in your home, you would go around looking for the person hiding in your house because it would sound exactly like a person talking in your home. You would search everywhere, under the bed, behind the couch, everywhere someone could hide.

I spent a year hanging out with a paranoid schizophrenic every day. He heard voices all the time, but he was convinced they were coming form the radio or the vents or wherever. For instance, he kept demanding that we take apart the radio in my car to find the recorder in there that was putting out the recordings.

When he first came over to my house, he said he heard someone down in the cellar, so we went down there to look, and there was no one there. I thought it was pretty weird at the time, and I did not know what to think of it, as I had just met the guy, and I did not know he had schizophrenia.

After I hung around with him a while, I started to put two and two together and realized that he was slowly developing paranoid schizophrenia. I figured this out because I had been studying mental illness for 25 years. I had never dealt with a paranoid schizophrenic up close and personal like that before, but he seemed to be a textbook case based on everything that I had read.

He was 28 years old, and the symptoms seem to have started when he was about 23 and at college. There is often a long slow prodrome with paranoid schizophrenia. So while it does have a later onset often in the late 20’s and early 30’s, there has often been a long slow prodrome going on characterized by slow deterioration for even up to five or ten years.

Paranoid schizophrenics do seem to function somewhat better than the rest of schizophrenics, possibly due to this later onset. Some of them have even married, had children, started on careers or opened businesses when the disease hits, so they have had some illness-free years in which to develop their personalities. Hence the personality is more intact in paranoid schizophrenia than with the other forms.

Later I would be over at his place, and he would hear the voices coming out of the vents. He lived with his Mom, and he insisted that his Mom put a recorder in there to harass him, and he wanted me to help him take the vent apart to “look for the tape recorder.” He had a lot of arguments with his Mom about her “putting the recorder in the vent.”

It was very difficult to deal with the guy because he heard the voices, and they were so loud and clear that he would whip around and say, “You hear that?” and he would point to the car radio or the vent or wherever. I always said no, and it was making him mad because the sound to him was clear as a bell, and it was absurd that I could not hear it. So he was always accusing me of being a liar and saying I did not hear the voices when really I did.

After a while, I started making excuses and saying things like I had a problem with my hearing.

The problem is do not want to agree with the person when they say they hear voices because you are just reinforcing their craziness, and pretty soon you will be working with the person to take your car radio apart to “find the microphone.”

Furthermore, it’s best not to reinforce their delusions either because you will just strengthen the craziness.

Actually it probably would not hurt to say you hear the voices too or agree with their delusions, but I always worried that it might make them worse.

For instance, a schizophrenic says someone is persecuting them. Well, you can either agree or not agree. If you agree, you run the risk of reinforcing their belief, and they might get so reinforced, convinced and angry that they assault the person.

Another problem is that I would take him places with me sometimes, say to my doctors appointments, while we were running about trying to get him an apartment. While there, say as we were leaving, he would insist that someone in the waiting room had said some particular insult to him. Actually no one had said anything to him, much less the insult that he heard. He would want to go back in the waiting room and challenge the person over the insult, and it would be rather difficult to convince him not to do that.

He had done very well in college and was a great basketball player but not such a good student. At one point, he had moved into an apartment with other people, but that all ended when he accused them of messing with him through the walls of the apartment. He also accused people of breaking into his car. He would go out to his car, and it would seem like someone had broken into it or messed with stuff inside. He eventually had to move out due to this, and he moved back home to live with his Mom.

I kept trying to get him into an apartment down in Fresno, but things kept falling apart. He would get into the new place, and it would have the damn recorders in it too, and he would accuse the guy was rented it to him of putting the recorders in there. I met one of the men who rented to him, and he was dumbfounded, shaking his head, and could not make sense out of my friend at all. His attitude was “Good God, what the Hell is the matter with this guy!?”

My friend was a mulatto, and he had a very charming personality along with being very goodlooking. Everywhere we went, he would walk up to young White women and chat them up in his usual engaging manner, and they would usually be very interested in him. He was quite a charmer and could really talk to the girls. It was insulting as the girls would always rather talk to the insane guy than to me who was not nuts, although I was in my 40’s at the time I must admit.

If you were out in public with him, and he was chatting up women or whatever, he would typically not seem crazy at all. Instead he would seem to be a perfectly normal, charming, extroverted guy.

I was never afraid of him. Everyone kept telling me he was dangerous, and they were all trying to get me to get rid of him as a friend. He didn’t seem violent to me, and I can read people pretty well. He did yell a lot but not usually at me – more at the folks who were “persecuting him.” The whole time I was with him, I would be looking at him and trying to read his mind (I am a very good mindreader) to figure out if he was going to do something violent. I never got any vibes off of him that he was going to be dangerous, so I wasn’t really worried about him.

However, people close to me eventually convinced me to ditch him, which was not easy. I saw him a few times later around town and gave him a couple of rides. Later he had somehow gotten a job at the local supermarket, but by that time, he was deteriorating even more, and he had become very quiet and would almost ever talk.

I later heard that he was down in my city roaming around on the streets and hanging out at the mentally ill drop-in place.

My friend would never admit to being even slightly mentally ill, and after a while I stopped confronting him about it. But I did try to get him to see a psychiatrist I knew under the guise of giving him some pills for his nerves to calm him down along with some other phony excuses. She was good at dealing with psychotic people who would not admit they were ill, and she would often succeed in surreptitiously giving them some antipsychotics under the guise of calming their nerves or other phony excuses. You have to be a bit sneaky with these people when they will not admit they are ill. I have known people who had psychotic or seriously mentally ill relatives who they were considering dosing with antipsychotics in their orange juice or coffee. I actually think that would be a morally proper act.

The problem in psychosis is that the person typically has no idea that they are ill. Whether they do not want to admit for psychological reasons such as stigma or whether they can’t realize they are ill because psychosis blinds the person to the fact that they are ill, I am not sure. I suspect some of both. Some people are episodically mentally ill, and when they get better, they will often not admit that they had been ill due to stigma or ego reasons.

The problem in psychosis is that the part of the body that is needed to recognize that you are ill is itself sick. The person can’t figure that they are ill because in order to do that, you usually have to be at least somewhat sane. In fact the presence of insight is an excellent diagnostic feature in mental illness, and the greater the insight, the better the prognosis.

Insight is also a very serious problem in Bipolar Disorder, even in the milder phase known as Hypomania.

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Threat Assessment in OCD

This is an excellent article.
Examples of obsessions:

Examples of normal intrusive thoughts include the image of touching the genitalia of a child, worry (in the absence of any evidence) as to whether one had caused an accident on the way home, urges or impulses to attack a loved one with a kitchen knife, or thoughts and images of jumping onto a railway track in front of an oncoming train.

That is a pretty good list, and the author points out that 80% of the population report having these thoughts also.

The risk is that the patient will act on an obsession (e.g. suicide or sexual acts with a child) or impulsively act out an obsessional fear. At its simplest, this need never be a concern: there are no recorded cases of a person with OCD carrying out their obsession. By definition, such intrusions are unacceptable and ego-dystonic, and the person is no more likely to act on their intrusions than a person with height phobia is to jump off a tall building. The obsession represents a type of fear or worry that the patient does not want to happen; like all fears or worries, it concerns ideas that the patient wishes to avert at all costs.

That seems to be correct, however, when the illness gets severe, the person can become convinced that they actually want to carry out these acts. I have spoken to quite a few people with OCD who told me that the illness made them feel like they wanted to have gay sex or have sex with children or assault and murder people. This is probably correct though in that people with OCD do not act on their obsessions. I have not met one person who acted on an obsession of causing harm to themselves or others, or how did anything sexual to a child in response to an obsession.
However, there are cases of people with gay OCD who get so convinced that they are gay that they go out and have sex with someone of the same sex. Usually this is a complete disaster and I would not advise it.
There are also cases of people with Relationship OCD who have left their partners or spouses. Generally, this does not solve the ROCD dilemma.

Where compulsions are concerned, urges that are themselves obsessions need to be distinguished from urges arising as responses to obsessions. Once this is done, the risks are relatively obvious. Thus, if someone has an obsessional fear of cutting themselves, you can be very certain that they will not harm themselves.
However, if the idea of harming others is the obsession, they might respond by cutting themselves rather than harming someone they love. Secondary risks are often subtle. For example, a parent who is constantly preoccupied with their obsessions may become less responsive and emotionally available to their children.

This is interesting. I have dealt with a few OCD’ers who cut themselves. All were women.
The next part goes into differentiating Sexual OCD from the type of thinking that goes on in a sex offender.

OCD or potential sexual offender?
Various factors differentiate the intrusive sexual thoughts of people with OCD from those of sexual offenders

  • Ego-dystonicity of the thoughts
  • Failure to act on or masturbate to the thoughts
  • Avoidance of trigger situations
  • Efforts to suppress the thoughts
  • Very frequent or constant occurrence of the thoughts
  • Dominant anxiety, distress and guilt about the thoughts
  • Overdisclosure of irrelevant past sexual history
  • Wanting help and seeking referral to mental health services
  • Presence of additional obsessive–compulsive symptoms

That is a pretty good list.
Assuming that in a sex offender, we are dealing with some sort of a paraphilia, I had one OCD’er who had obsessive thoughts of slitting his father’s throat. He was terrified that he was going to act on these thoughts and that he got some sort of sexual arousal out of them. His therapist told him that this was OCD, and that paraphilias are “about desire, not fear,” and “no resistance.” This is about right. I would expect to see little to no resistance in a paraphilia. OCD is a problem of fear and paraphilia is a problem of desire.
You are also looking at something that is occurring all or almost all of the time. If it is, it is likely you are dealing with an obsession. With paraphilias, they are much less likely to be going all the time, and when they are frequent, the person is likely to be fantasizing.
The anxiety, distress and guilt over the thoughts is often profound. I have had quite a few OCD’ers tell me that they were crying for hours on end, either could not sleep or were lying in bed all day or had even lost weight due to not eating. It is quite common for them to say that they are suicidal; however, OCD’ers usually do not attempt or commit suicide. I have only had OCD’er who attempted suicide and she tried twice.
Presence of another disorder like Borderline Personality Disorder is likely to greatly increase the risk of suicidality. In such cases, the suicidality is likely due to the BPD and not the OCD. It is curious that OCD’ers are so commonly suicidal but they rarely attempt or carry it out. The OCD’er is a shy, almost meek person whose dominant emotion is fear or even terror. Quite simply, they are too scared of dying to kill themselves, so the fear associated with suicide prevents them from carrying out the act. In contrast, a violent of sexual offender is likely to see the thoughts as fun or enjoyable, though sometimes they feel guilty for enjoying them so much.
Wanting help is a great one. When someone comes to me on the brink of suicide due to their “horrible pedo thoughts that popped up out of the blue,” I am quite certain that this person is not a pedophile. I have only have one pedophile come to me in all the time I have worked with OCD’ers, and he went away pretty quickly. In contrast, sex offenders or pedophiles will rarely show up for help. One man who was interested in working with pedophiles as a career was told that unless he was working in a prison setting, he would never see one in clinical practice.
Resistance is the hallmark of OCD. George Winokur, a famous psychiatrist, said, “Look at how hard the person fights the thoughts. That is a clue to whether you are dealing with OCD or with something else.”
Another interesting thing you will see is checking. So the person with pedophile thoughts will constantly conjure up pedo thoughts and then examine their reaction to them to see if they are properly horrified. A person with gay thoughts tests himself to see whether or not he finds gay sex repulsive. A person with violent thoughts frequently conjures up violent thoughts or scenarios to check to see if they are actually repulsed by them or if they are repulsed by them enough. Sometimes the thought or image must be repeated over and over until the person finally feels that they have obtained the “right” level of disgust. You will see much less resistance in paraphilias; in fact, typically, there is none.
Failure to masturbate to the thoughts is not a great checkpoint, as I have had quite a few folks who were masturbating to pedo thoughts as a way of checking to see if they were turned on by this sort of thing. In the paraphilias, the person masturbates, often compulsively, to the imagery of the paraphilia, pedophilic, sadomasochistic or other fantasies or pornography. They get great pleasure out of this, and they generally do not want to stop.
Ego-dystonic is excellent. Paraphilias are much more likely to be ego-syntonic. Although this one is a bit tricky, and the OCD will often argue with the person and tell them that they actually like the thoughts when they do not. This leads to a lot of confusion over whether they enjoy the thoughts or not.

They will avoid trigger situations.
Harm OCD’ers will avoid other people or avoid weapons, heights or pill bottles if they worry about self-harm. Pedophile OCD’ers will avoid children like the plague. Gay OCD’ers will avoid anything to do with gay people. Sometimes they avoid their own sex or even the opposite sex. In contrast, many pedophiles will actively seek out places where children are present.
Overdisclosure of irrelevant past. Many times, those with pedophile worries will reveal all sorts of incidents in their childhood past that they feel prove that they are pedophiles. Usually this is just harmless child sex play of the sort that all children engage in. A Harm OCD’er will reveal incidents in his past in which he was violent in order to prove that he is a murderer. Usually this sort of thing is sort of a back-checking and doubting sort of thing in which the mind is trying to come up with reasons why the obsession is true. In contrast, a sex offender will often hide their past due to fears of being caught.
Presence of other OCD symptoms. This is an excellent clue that you are dealing with OCD, and I use it often when I am trying to figure out if I am dealing with OCD or something else. With a sex offender, usually you will not find any OCD.

Factors suggesting OCD in thoughts of violence

  1. Ego-dystonicity
  2. Absence of past behavior consistent with the thought
  3. Presence of avoidance behavior (e.g. avoidance of knives or sharp implements)
  4. Frequent thoughts
  5. High degree of distress
  6. Strong motivation to seek help

The ego-dystonic nature of violent thoughts is often profound, and the resistance provoked by them is often extreme. In contrast, real violent thoughts are typically ego-syntonic and are quite pleasant to the person.
Absence of past violent behavior. The Harm OCD’er is typically a very nice, kind, sweet and gentle person – the last sort of person you would think would do such a thing. They typically have little violence in their past, certainly little violent crime or unprovoked attacks on innocents.
Presence of avoidance behavior. The Harm OCD’er is often afraid of knives, weapons, etc. and tries to put them away or hide them. In contrast, a violent person may be quite comfortable with weapons.
Frequent thoughts. When the violent thoughts are going all the time like a broken record, you may be dealing with OCD. Violent people do not necessarily think violent thoughts all the time. Instead they only think them some of the time.
High degree of distress. Harm thoughts provoke severe anxiety. Some people hospitalize themselves to avoid hurting other people. I talked to one woman who had been in a hospital for four years with Harm OCD. In contrast, violent people tend to like their violent thoughts and they think them anytime they want to with great pleasure.
An OCD’er with Harm OCD told me that they went to a forum for psychopaths and asked them about the harm thoughts that he was experiencing and whether they experienced the same thoughts. The sociopaths were mystified that the man felt the thoughts were abhorrent. One of them said, “Actually, one of the few things I like to think about is hurting people and killing people.” The rest of the sociopaths all endorsed that statement. Dangerous people like to think violent thoughts; they get kicks out of it.
Strong motivation to seek help. The OCD’er is panicked over is violent thoughts and desperately wants to be rid of them. By contrast, a truly violent person likes to feel violent and doesn’t want to feel any other way. I have not yet had a truly violent person come to me wanting help with violent thoughts so they don’t carry them out.
I had one homicidal person, but they very much wanted to feel that way, and there was nothing I could do to talk them out of it. The whole problem with this sort of thing is that the people who are actually going to carry out violent and sexual offenses, the people who are really going to do these things – well, they never show up. Instead the only ones clinicians see are the people who are never going to act on any of this stuff.
Resistance. I would add this one to the list. Violent thoughts often provoke furious resistance in an attempt to keep them out of the head. In contrast, someone who is actually going to carry out an unprovoked act of violence against an innocent person spends little if any time resisting thoughts. One Harm OCD’er was afraid he was a serial killer, but he had never committed any violent acts along those lines.
He asked his therapist, “What about a person who actually does these things? Do they ever try to stop the thoughts?”
“No.”
“Not even once.”
“No, not even once, of course not.”
So resistance or the lack of it really is a good marker for OCD versus something else.
Therapists often make OCD worse in various ways. Here are some of the ways that they can make it worse.

Examples of patients’ comments regarding their assessments
‘He gave me a differential diagnosis which made me panic as it increased my doubts about whether I did have OCD.’
‘She said that, to be on the safe side, it would be better if I avoided working with children until I had received treatment.’
‘He said SSRI’s might reduce my sexual urges so I assumed he must think there was a problem.’
‘She said I was unlikely to act out any urges but she was still obliged to notify Social Services.’
‘He implied I might have an unconscious wish to stab my baby.’
‘He said it was extremely rare for such thoughts to mean that someone was dangerous, but if I was still worried, I could go for a specialist assessment at the sexual offenders unit.’
‘She said it was very rare for this type of violent thought to lead people to act on it, but “as you obviously have a problem dealing with anger, then therapy would be a good idea”.’

There is no point in saying any of these things, and I try very hard not to make OCD’ers worse when I deal with them.

References

Veale, David; Freeston, Mark; Krebs, Georgina; Heyman, Isobel and Salkovskis, Paul. 2009. Risk Assessment and Management in Obsessive–compulsive Disorder. Advances in Psychiatric Treatment 15: 332-343
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Therapy of Sex Offenders

Therapy of sex offenders is a difficult subject, with much misinformation around. We have data in for three types:

  1. Pedophiles
  2. Exhibitionists
  3. Rapists

In general, therapy for pedophiles and exhibitionists has fared pretty well. The best techniques are probably cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT). Persons who go through therapy are significantly less likely to re-offend than those who do not. It is a lie that sex offenders are all incurable.
The therapy of rapists has been much more difficult and until recently, it had a bad track record. However, recent advances in CBT have shown that rapists can be treated with some success. Whether that success is at a higher or lower rate than the prior two offenders is not known.
The problems with the rapist are generally at least twofold.
1. Rage, anger and hatred. Most if not all rapists have extremely high levels of rage, anger and hatred. In fact, this is what typically motivates the crime. In addition, it is typical for them to have strong to extreme levels of hatred for women. It is the rage in general and the hatred for women in particular that tends to set off the crimes.
2. Low levels of empathy. Most if not all rapists have low to nonexistent levels of empathy for their victims. Although most sex offenses are characterized by similarly low levels of empathy, the lack of empathy in rapists is quite striking. In many cases, they simply do not care how their female victim feels. In other cases, they rationalize that the victim, or really all women, want to be raped, that is, they secretly desire it or enjoy it. Some say that unless the woman is violently fighting back, that means she wants it and enjoys it.
Low empathy levels are obviously a significant driver for offending, and it is one of the hardest things to deal with in therapy. Often there does not seem to be any way to get the offender to feel empathy for his potential victims. Why this is uncertain. Perhaps some people simply do not want to feel empathy. The therapy of individuals like this is to tell that even though they don’t feel empathy for their potential victims, they should not offend anyway because to do so might get them in trouble with the law. So you appeal to the offender’s self-interest in not offending. It’s not how you will make the victim feel, it is about what will happen to your life.
There is no one type of rapist. Not all rapists are serial rapists, though serial rapists are the worst kind by far. Some rapists rape only once and without warning. When asked, some of these types say they do not even know why they raped; they just did it. Others, serial rapists and single rapists, rape at a stressful point in their lives. Rape appears to be their way of blowing off steam so to speak.
Serial rapists may have gotten into a habit of compulsively raping. In this case, it is like an addiction, and it may be difficult to break the habit.
Antecedents of rape include voyeurism, exhibitionism, transvestic fetishism, frotteurism, panty fetishes and raiding women’s places to obtain them and burglary. All of these have in common a violation of the female victim in one way or another. While many who do these things do not escalate, some do.

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