Month: August 2022

Another old post getting new comments. This one is kind of cool and it generated some controversy. Keep in mind that this is not what I want to believe. I always used to believe that if we only put women in power, things would be so much better. Turns out it’s not true, sadly. Instead they wreck things even worse than we do, in their own feminine style of course. So keep in mind that I started from the other point of view until the evidence I didn’t want to hear won me over.

By the way, I can’t believe I wrote a post called The Cunts Versus the Men! No matter how bad I am now, it seems that I was always worse in the past! I guess we can call that progress.

In the provocatively titled The Cunts Versus the Men post, perceptive commenter Tyciol writes:

Maybe a better word than feminism would be ‘equalism’ or something?

Like it’s relative to position.

Women were certainly downtrodden in the past and lacking rights, so equalism would be feminist in that case.

But in the reverse scenario, if men could not vote and related things, then equalism would have a masculinist agenda.

Suffrage to me has never been about focusing on women’s rights but simply equality, since they are also people and also have opinions which should be counted. Similarly, right to choice (abortion) to me is not about favoring women but rather that people should not be forced to carry parasitic feti for months if they don’t wish to.

I’m pro-choice, and I’m all for equality for women in all of the sane ways. But I wonder if equality ever works. We offered women equality, and instead they took their equality and ran past the 50 yard line heading for our goalposts to try to dominate us and rule us. I guess it’s natural. Neither sex is going to be happy with mere equality. If you give women equality, they’re always going to use that step stool to try to install Female Rule. And I guess we asshole guys will always try to install Male Rule.

Sigh.

Nevertheless, equality is surely something to support. Better than equality: how about this? Rights. Not necessarily equality, but rights. No matter what we think of them, females have basic rights, and in most ways, they have the same basic rights as we do. So do gays, Blacks, lots of folks. It’s not a matter of liking. You don’t have like Black people; a lot of White people don’t. And a lot of straights are not too fond of gays. But how can we deny that gays and surely Blacks have the same set of basic rights that any human does?

I have nothing against Female Rule in principle, assuming they were capable. But I don’t think they are. And I don’t want to live under Female Rule. The chicks will dig it (I guess! Or maybe they won’t?!), but it will suck for the guys. We already have a Matriarchy with the Politically Correct crowd, and honestly, it sucks.

Male Rule sort of sucks for women, but they seem to be happy, and the men surely are happy. Female Rule violates Nature* and seems to make both sexes increasingly miserable.

I don’t think that females ought to be allowed to install their Female Paradigm in society. Think about it. Is there any society that ever let the women rule? I can’t think of one. Why is that? Surely it must have been tried in the past. Not all human males are patriarchal shits, and a lot of us are lazy. Surely there were times in the past when the lazy guys said, “We give up. You do it. You rule. Go for it.” I assume it was tried in many cases in the past, and the result was the same as it is now: chaos. In which case, the sane people realized that either you have Male Rule or you have Chaos.

Allowing the Male Paradigm to rule society works, and most societies work that way, but it also often violates women’s rights at least somewhat most of the time and keeps them down. But in a lot of these societies, like Hispanic ones and many other traditional societies, women seem to like living under Male Rule. You go to these places, and as long as Male Rule isn’t too evil, everyone seems happy. It’s like they know they are Living In Nature.

I don’t hear a lot of complaints from the Hispanic females around here about the Male Rule they live under. Women get to be feminine, men get to be masculine, and everyone is happy. I don’t think Hispanic women want to rule. They want some relative equality, at least in terms of earning power, and around here they are granted that. Hispanic women can make quite a bit of money, and some do here. But they’re still quite feminine.

On the other hand, White women seem to have so much greater freedom than Hispanic women, but they seem to be so much more miserable! It’s like the more freedom you give women, the less happy they are, and the more they complain about Male Rule.

Even when the women are in charge, increasingly the case nowadays, the women keep complaining about the Patriarchy. As Female Rule deepens, the women get angrier and angrier (paradoxically as they get more and more rights and power!) and become more and more masculine. This upsets Nature, and Nature doesn’t tolerate defiance. She demands balance, just like in the forests and jungles.

As the women get increasingly masculine, the males will have to become increasingly feminine to compensate and create the balance that Nature demands. As women become increasingly masculine, they get more and more unhappy, because it violates women’s own nature. On some level, the female organism knows that acting masculine is fucked up, and this throws the organism into disarray.

Of course, as males become increasingly feminine, they get more and more miserable too, because femininity violates man’s own nature. So you end up with Northern California White People, where even the straight people act like queers and dykes.

It follows from this scenario that you would see increasing situational and opportunistic homosexuality in both sexes. As males feminize, they tend to engage in increasing amounts of homosexuality. As females masculinize, they also tend to engage in increasing amounts of homosexuality.

As Female Rule deepens, women will increasingly reject continuous marriage and raise fatherless men. Once again, a violation of Nature. Nature demands that both males and females have fathers. Nature punishes those who defy her. She punishes fatherless males by turning them into criminals who lash out at the world as a surrogate for missing father. She punishes fatherless females by turning them into sluts, trying to screw their way to Daddy’s missing love.

Both criminals and sluts are often unhappy, probably because most men are not supposed to be criminals and most women are not supposed to be sluts. Both criminals and sluts frequently lead at least difficult and often tragic lives.

Women can have power, but only if they either don’t upset Male Rule or at least only try to be equal.

*I am applying Nature in the sense of Natural Law, especially the Catholic or philosophical sense. When I say something violates Nature, I mean it violates Natural Law – that is, it’s unnatural in terms of mankind’s evolution.

Of course violations of Natural Law occur, but as they violate our evolutionary imperative encoded in our genes, there will be ill effects, since humans are not meant to violate Natural Law. Violations of Natural Law will have consequences.

Feminine men and masculine women are miserable. Female Rule (matriarchy) violates Natural Law and results in chaos and even unhappiness for females, since even females dislike Matriarchy deep down inside because it’s unnatural. Fatherless families violate Natural Law and result in criminal boys and slut daughters, both of whom are miserable.

When I say something violates Natural Law, I mean it violates our evolutionary imperatives coded in our genes. The result will be unhappiness and pathology, as our natural and genetic imperatives are violated, thwarted, and twisted.

An old uplifting post based on a comment I get. I guess in a lot of cases, there is hope, even when there seems to be none.

Very cool comment from the Juggalo Funeral post. Moving and well-written. Enjoy.

Howard, I appreciate your thoughts on this pathetic situation. You wrote, “Try to imagine having nothing; no education, no skills, no talent, no drive. In short, no future!”

Frankly, I don’t have to imagine it – I’ve been there. To compound the problem, I had been thrust into a society I was thoroughly unfamiliar with and did not understand at all (American culture) after having been reared in various foreign countries from the age of 8 & coming back to USA at 16. That same year, I simultaneously lost my virginity and became pregnant by a man seven years my senior. He was a cretin, obviously – and I was a lost, scared, emotionally wounded little girl who had just lost her Dad and seen her family disintegrate before her eyes…now I see all that, but back then I only felt shame and guilt.

I was ‘forced’ by my family to marry the man. It was what “good families” did back then, you see. Shame and coercion were the tools used to somehow, supposedly, magically, and remarkably preserve the family’s good name. Cool, huh? So I did as I was told. I dropped out of high school the summer before my Senior year. I was 17 in July, and my baby was born in November. When she was six weeks old, I got pregnant…the first time I’d had intercourse since the birth. When my first child was 11 months old, I had twins. I had just turned 18.

At 19, I found myself with three babies in diapers, two black eyes, and one old car to use as a “getaway.” Having been effectively abandoned by my family partially due to circumstances beyond their control and partially because the whole family had exploded to bits, I ended up living in that old car for a couple of months. Back then, disposable diapers were uncommon, inefficient, and very expensive. Basically, they were only used while traveling if you could afford them. I often had no way to do laundry after I escaped the abusive father of my babies, and many times I ended up using my T-shirts as diapers.

Fast forward…I’m a grandmother of seven, living in a little cabin my husband & I designed ourselves and put on our 100 acres of land – all paid for, free & clear – getting ready to retire early at age 54. I’ve had a successful career in medicine, although I did not attend college until my children had all left home. Neither did I remarry until my kids had all grown and left the nest. It is possible, albeit often very difficult, to rise above the storms, slights, and indignities of life. For years I lived in shame, guilt, humiliation, disgrace, degradation, and ignominy. I felt I had no right to my very existence.

I worked at menial minimum wage jobs (often two or 2 1/2 jobs at a time) and steered clear of drugs, alcohol, etc…couldn’t have afforded them if I’d wanted them anyway. As the years went by, I did begin to use alcohol. Excessively. I was a functional drunk. Not an alcoholic, just a drunk…which is less respectable than being an alcoholic. I did it by choice, not because of addiction. It was my chicken-shit escape. I’m not proud of it, but that is the way it is. The way it was anyway.

Life can be hard at the best of times. Some of us choose to rise to the challenge and eventually overcome…some of us make excuses as to why we “can’t.” I have empathy for this couple…but they make their choices just as you and I make ours. Being poor, disenfranchised, abandoned by every level of society, degraded, hurt, and relatively unintelligent didn’t define the rest of my life. Unintentionally or not, my life was effed up by my own actions and my own choices…I was an ignorant child, but I still did it to myself. By the same token, I eventually crawled out of it with no help from anyone.

The blame is all mine, but so is the eventual triumph.

I don’t really know why I felt moved to share this with you. Maybe just to say, “I wish someone like you had cared enough to give me some encouragement, to just see me, when I was going through my own personal journey out of Hell.” I feel for this family…as bad as it was for me when I was young, I never had to live in their world. I’m grateful for that. I wish them all the best in their own journey out of their own Hell…because it surely is Hell, whether of their own making or not.

Another old post that’s getting new comments. I do like it. Needs a repost.

Nothing makes men more furious that being dominated in a cruel way by women or having their masculinity attacked by them. It actually literally makes us want to kill them. I had several girlfriends in the past who more or less attacked my masculinity, even gleefully.

Others had other men at the time we were together (although we were in an open relationship), but they deliberately did so in an open and outrageous way as if they were actually trying to provoke me. Yes, they were actually trying to make me murder them. But women do this all the time. Many women delight in provoking men to such an extent that as far as I am concerned, they are trying to get murdered because they do things to men that in Man World would immediately get you hit, if not out and out murdered.

Women try to push us men to our limits or even beyond them. It is very stupid (and dangerous) of women to do this, but they keep doing it.

Feminism has made this female behavior dramatically more common. In my mother’s generation, women were terrified to attack their husband’s masculinity. My mother even told me that she didn’t want to do that. I asked her why she didn’t do something one time, and she said, “Oh, he will see that as attacking his masculinity. I don’t want to attack his masculinity.”

Her attitude was more that doing such things was gross, unladylike, and undignified. My mother would see that sort of behavior as common with working class women and Black and Hispanic women. That’s what low class women do – provoke their husbands, bitch at them for no reason, and pick fights with them.

My mother’s coterie of White middle to upper class women simply didn’t act that way – you would be acting like those low class and non-White women they looked down on.

I knew a Colombian woman once. The worst insult you could say to a woman in her society was that she was “a woman of the streets.” To her, there was nothing lower than that. She was from an upper middle class background in the north of Bogota.

I remembered those damned girlfriends who attacked me that way. In some cases, I forgot all the fun we had, and when I reminisced, all I would think of was those times when they deliberately tried to cut my balls off with words, sometimes in public, sometimes in front of other men and women. Public humiliation. I remembered those incidents for decades.

And for decades, I literally wanted to kill every one of those women who attacked my masculinity like that.

I’ve gotten over it now and I feel better with this off my shoulders. But nevertheless, my first and immediate instinct to a woman wantonly and even gleefully attacking my masculinity was, “You’re going to die for that, bitch. No forgiveness. Ever.”

I’ve been attacked as “stabby” by feminists for writing this, but please keep in mind that I never killed any of those women. Hell, I never even tried to. I never even threatened to. I never even hit them. I never even threatened to hit them. I had some thoughts. Yes, they were bad thoughts, but they were just thoughts.

My point is that my reaction must be common. And consider that I am a pacifist, a passive man who is basically a coward. Hundreds of millions of men are a lot more aggressive and brave than I am. Obviously they react the same way I do and have the same thoughts I do. If even a pacifist thinks like this, think how an aggressive man thinks. Think what an aggressive man does.

Women are playing with fire. Don’t mess with this aspect of men. Most men or at least me know not to mess with men’s masculinity. We know that men will attack or even kill to preserve that. I don’t do it for fear of being hit or killed. Women, I suppose, never got the memo. Or did and filed it in the bin.

I am almost ashamed to say I never even hit or did anything violent to any of those women. Even worse than that, I rarely even fought back against these attacks. I just sat there and took it like a big, fat pussy. And got hurt. Real hurt.

Why? Because my Mom taught me that you never fight a woman.

Still getting some comments. Deserves a repost.

The Western media.

I got a BA in this field called Journalism, and I must say that I am utterly disgusted. This whole field is pretty much gone in the West. I don’t think there is anything left of it. All there is is propaganda anymore. Investigative journalism? What the Hell is that? The search for the truth? Don’t make me laugh. Freedom of the press? Are you kidding? An unbiased and objective media, as expected under the system of liberalism known preposterously as “freedom and democracy?” Huh?

For every real journalist, there are probably 99 presstitutes.

There are still some real journalists out there, but there aren’t any in the major US press, large newspapers and newsmagazines, and large TV and radio news stations. The only real journalists are found in little presses, small radio stations like Pacifica, and on relatively obscure websites. In other words, for 95

I am not quite sure what the reason for this massive totalitarian sleaze-out is, but I can’t help thinking that corporate control over the media has something big to do with it.

For instance, the Washington Post just got bought up by ultra-sleazy billionaire Jeff Bezos. Obviously, Jeffy is only going to allow those stories to appear in his paper that reflect the views of him and his 1

What is starting to really terrify me is that I am seeing how most of the European media is about as dishonest, propagandistic and corrupted as American media. All this time I thought the European press was some kind of breath of fresh air. Turns out they are all corrupted beyond hope too.

There are a few exceptions. Every now and again the Telegraph or the Daily Mail runs a piece that goes against state propaganda.

I am starting to think that maybe under capitalism, the media will always be controlled by the leaders of the state, the rich, and the pillars of the corporate class, so the media under capitalism will always have a totalitarian, pure propaganda feel to it.

What system would yield true freedom of the press? Not sure, but capitalism it ain’t.

In this post here, a commenter got all of the writers but 3, 4, 9, and 10.

1. Eudora Welty 2. William Faulkner 5. John Cheever 6. Jack London 7. Zora Neale Hurston. 8. J.D. Salinger. 11. Truman Capote

So here are 3, 4, 9, and 10.

3. Alice Munro. She is a modern writer of short stories, mostly based in Canada. I think she is quite good and I have read some of her short stories. She doesn’t fall into the “woman writer” trap.

4. Edith Wharton. Wrote about the lives of upper class New Yorkers around the turn of the century. Books include The Age of Innocence and Ethan Frome. I admit that I have not read any Edith Wharton, but she is said to be quite good.

10. Carson McCullers. She was a lesbian, I just now learned. But her writing is said to be quite good, but I’ve never read any of it. Reflections in a Golden Eye is one of the first books to deal openly with male homosexuality, although Gore Vidal’s Myra Breckenridge appeared about the same time. E. M. Forster had written Maurice, but it was not published in his lifetime.

Most of the male authors writing around Forster’s time were closeted like Forster. This included Thomas Mann and a few others. Of course Death in Venice had a gay theme, but it was such great art that no one seemed to care about the gay theme, and at the end of the day, it’s so much more than a “gay story” that that part of it fades into the background. Oscar Wilde was not so much out as outed. He was thrown in prison for homosexuality.

The Europeans were more open about such things, and Andre Gide of France was writing about this before Vidal or McCullers. However, his openly gay novel written in the 1920’s received severe abuse in Catholic France. Walt Whitman was homosexual but he was also celibate his entire life. John Manley Hopkins was probably a similar case. Thomas Carlyle never consummated his marriage, but this was probably more due to sexual repression than anything else.

I’ve never read anything by Vidal other than political stuff. I read only a very short essay by Forster. I’ve read nothing by Mann, which is sad. And I haven’t even read any Oscar Wilde, which is also pathetic. I did read Song of Myself by Walt Whitman and I’ve read some of Hopkins fine poetry like The Wreck of the Grosvener. Never read anything by Carlyle either. This reading history of mine here is looking pretty sorry. I did finally read my first Gide, a short story called The Parable of the Prodigal Son, and it was excellent. Highly recommended!

10. Flannery O’Connor. Excellent! I’ve only read one story of hers, A Good Man Is Hard to Find, but boy is it a doozy! Damn! If you read that story, you will not be disappointed. I have a book of her short stories, but that’s the only one I read. The rest of her stuff is said to be also excellent.

This is an old post that has been getting some new comments. It’s worth a repost. I also edited it and added some new writing at the beginning.

Otherwise known as Histrionic Personality Disorder, which is thought to be simply the manifestation of psychopathy in the female. There have been recent arguments that Borderline Personality Disorder is also a manifestation of psychopathy in the female. And there are also out and out female psychopaths, diagnosed as such. They are about half as common as male psychopaths and their behavior is quite different.

Do you know who Mata Hari was? Look her up. Female spy from the 1910’s. Classic Histrionic Personality Disorder. The “femme fatale” type is also a Histrionic Personality Disorder. At the far end, you have out and out homicidal cunts like black widows. However, female psychopaths are far less physically violent than male psychopaths. Women are just not physically dangerous in peacetime.

I think they have a deep revulsion for physical violence at the core of their being that may be biological. If you think about it, a woman who is not averse to physical violence might be liable to kill her child or her partner. The females evolutionary strategy is to avoid violence and somehow manage to survive via various wiles, even if the male’s strategy is to seek it out.

I recently dated one – a Black woman. As you might guess she was more or less a whore like far too many Black women. Actually, to be fair, the woman was actually 50

I had some very unfortunate dealings with this evil cunt, and she was absolutely a female psychopath. I had never actually dealt with one up close. This was also the most manipulative woman I have ever met. In addition, she was a pathological liar, in fact she was one of the most brilliant liars I have ever met. She was basically a con artist and a very skilled one at that. In a way her social skills were absolutely brilliant. And that was on top of a not particularly high IQ of ~80.

Female psychopaths are similar to male psychopaths in a lot of ways, but they are not particularly violent or even aggressive. They’re just more or less charming thieves, or thieving whores is more like that. These diabolical cunts exist on this planet for the sole reason of stealing from us men.

I used to wonder why men killed whores, but I am starting to get it. About half of whores are the most evil bitches of all. This is as bad as a woman gets – a whore, a thieving, conniving Goddamned whore.

And “whore” is the typical outcome of the female psychopath. On the other hand in my opinion, male psychopaths are much worse than the female ones. The males are much more aggressive and dramatically more violent. The females are a bit hard to spot, as their basic demeanor is seductive, so they seem friendly at first. This is what makes them such brilliant con artists because initially they are quite attractive, especially in a sexual sense.

I have never met an actual White female psychopath, but I have met a pretty psychopathic Hispanic woman. Actually I dated her too. Her and her evil little sister. Yeah, I dated two women at once, a first for me! And they were both hot too, 23 and 29 years old. And I was ~58.

The date was a catastrophe but at least I did it, and a good part of the date was spent with the older one flirting with me when she wasn’t try to out and out grab my dick. She and her wicked bitch sister were both quite skilled liars. They were liars but they were not pathological liars like the bitch above. But they were pretty good liars. They both stole $20 from me somehow or other.

The thing about these women is that like most psychopaths they are brilliant at thinking on their feet and instant decision making. Often their words, decisions, and behavior don’t seem to make sense at all and you are left wondering, “Why the Hell did she even do that? Why did she say that? How weird.”

Their behavior initially seems strange, unfathomable, and even incomprehensible. The emotion that they leave in their wake and impart on their victim is mostly chaos and confusion. Everything seems to happen very fast, and things are changing all the time. They basically wrap you into some sort of a spell with their charming lies.

My brother was visiting me at the time when I showed up at my place with this evil bitch. I ended up taking the bitches ID (well, she gave it to me) as collateral for the money I spent on her which I argued was fraud because I gave it to her on the condition that she would have sex with me, and as usual, she didn’t fulfill her end of the deal. The number of “thieving whores” like this out there is very high and it would blow your mind to know how common they are. My co-blogger Alpha Unit told that those are the worst women of all. She also said that they all have an extreme hatred of men.

The next day she came back to get ID, but I kept it and insisted she pay me back for the money I wasted on her that she stole from me. What followed was a whirlwind of behavior that was baffling and hard to follow. It threw me off my toes and was an absolutely brilliant performance.

She somehow ended up getting her ID back from me and giving me zero dollars of the money. How she did it was diabolically complex, and in fact she tried a number of plans until she found one that succeeded. Her plans and lies changed on the spot. She would figure out one set of lies or a plan was not working and she would switch on a dime to a new plan and a new set of lies. It was almost a masterpiece performance.

After the bitch left it was like I had been hit by a hurricane that whirled into my life, caused a lot of very weird confusion and destruction, and then whirled away like a tornado before I could blink an eye. The main emotion I was left with was, “What in the Hell was that? What in God’s name was thing on two legs I just experienced?”

The conclusion is that this was a female psychopath, and the feeling after they use you and vanish is the same feeling you get after a male psychopath does the same thing.

People who deal with male psychopath also describe a charming man who magically appears in their lives followed by a lot of very weird behavior that someone sucks you into it. They end up harming you in one way or another, usually to get something out of you, and then they also whirl away like a funnel cloud while you are spinning in your room asking, “What the Hell was that thing I just experienced?” That “thing” was a male psychopath.

So both male and female psychopaths whirl into people’s lives in similar ways, cause a lot of somehow charming chaos and drama, and then vanish as soon as they magically appeared, leaving you used, burned, and harmed in some way or other. Not to mention bitter and out for vengeance.

And with both types you are left spinning asking yourself what the Hell you just experienced. You are asking this because ultimately the behavior of a true psychopath is quite strange, and they are extremely different from most humans to the point where they almost seem like aliens.

It took a couple of days of conversation with my brother until we decoded all of the weird things she said and did. What seemed incomprehensible and baffling and counterintuitive at first was actually all part of a fiendishly brilliant master plan if you will. I assume that all psychopaths act something like this.

And the plots and dialogues of the average psychopath’s master plans are so complex and hard to comprehend that I assume a lot of people never really figure what the meaning was behind the words and behavior of the psychopath who just harmed them. Psychopaths almost have a PhD in con artistry.

This old post from a few years ago is still getting some comments. I went back and reread it and thought it was so good that it should be reposted!

I finally see now how incels feel because I have virtually become Omega simply due to my age.

I realize that this is just the normal way that life is, but it still hurts. The problem is I still see myself as That Guy. I see young women all the time who would be checking me out, flirting with me, or at least looking at my younger self, and now they act like I’m a ghost. My former life varied from Normie to Failed Normie to various species of Chad. According to one definition of the term, I’ve been Alpha for a lot of my life.

I was also incel for various periods which ended after variable lengths of time. I was actually legendary neighborhood Chad at one point. Other men almost worshiped me like a God. I kept hearing:

How the Hell do you do it? I will never understand how you get all these chicks. This is one thing I will never understand.

Like that. It’s a great way to live. If you can live like that for even one month or maybe even one week, you can just about die happy the next day because you would have gotten everything you wanted out of life.

Fast forward and I am now 60 years old. I am now invisible to 99

All my life, women have been looking at me, flirting with me, smiling at me, going into robot frozen stares at me (Game pro tip: that means you’re making her horny and she wants to have sex with you). I am used to this. It’s just the normal every day.

Well, now that’s gone. All the sex has been sucked out of my world. Almost no woman flirts with me ever, not for one second. Even the slightest bit of flirting that I try is coldly shot down. There is no possibility of sexual anything, even flirtation, in my day to day life. Almost no woman even looks at me anymore.

Sometimes they look at me and smile, but I think that is just to say, “You’re old but you’re normal, so I will smile at you.” Problem is if I go to talk to her after she smiled at me, she often acts outraged. Their attitude is,

How dare you fucking try to talk to me!

You see, I have no right to talk to them, or to talk to any woman, ever, for the rest of my life, I guess. Because age.

I also get these,

How dare you ever fucking look at me, old man!

looks sometimes. I can’t even look at these cunts.

Sometimes I will look at a woman, and she will almost fly backwards like,

I can’t believe you’re even looking at me, you gross old man!

Then if I talk to them, they fly backwards some more like,

You’re talking to me! I can’t believe it!

Probably because I am still halfway normal, and I still have 100

I said my Game is worthless. It is worthless, and my Game is kick-ass, or used to be anyway. But Game without Looks and $1.79 will get you a Slurpee at a 7-11 and not much else. In other words, Game -Looks is just about worthless. I’m so tired of  all the PUA’s:

All you need is Game. Looks are not important.

They’re all fraudsters selling snake oil.

I still date young women sometimes, even all the way down to teenage girls if I get really lucky. I have no idea how I still get teenage girls because it’s impossible to do at my age. Apparently I am violating the laws of physics somehow. Problem is these girls and even young women up to late 20’s end up ending the relationship after 1-12 weeks.

When they end it, sometimes they more or less tell me I am ugly. I am getting told that a lot now. Specifically, they say they are not attracted to me. The painful thing about that is that no woman ever said that to me until I got into my 50’s. They broke up with me for all sorts of reasons, but none ever said they were not attracted to me. And no women who decided not to date me ever said she was not attracted to me. I did hear, “You’re not my type,” but that’s not necessarily insulting.

Like I sometimes date young women, even models. The last one (an actual model, 28 years old) was good for five weeks, and then she ended it, saying I did not turn her on. In other words, I am ugly.

She spent 24 hours in my hotel room recently and even spent the night in my bed. She acted like I was radioactive and went so far to the edge of the bed she looked like she might fall off. I had to go over to my edge. She freaked out and visibly flinched any time I even barely touched her. She wouldn’t even snuggle up next to me or kiss me a bit.

That was literally the worst night of my life. I have never felt so ugly, unattractive, and unwanted. The feeling is so devastating it is hard to put into words.

I hire maids, usually illegal aliens, to clean my place. I always try to seduce them because I am a disgusting pig who generally tries to seduce any woman unlucky enough to get stuck in my apartment. They’ve all been blowing me off, but sometimes I at least get to feel their bodies a bit through their clothes before they start laughing and push me away.

But last spring, I finally had some success! I got one of my maids to take a shower with me (she was homeless).

I told her she needed a shower as she was homeless, and she agreed. Of course it was a ruse just to get her into the shower so I could climb in with her. She went into the bathroom and started disrobing. I went in after her without saying a word. I didn’t say a word, just started disrobing myself. She didn’t say anything but she looked at me outraged like:

I can’t believe you’re doing this!

She got in the shower and I jumped in right afterwards. She protested for a few seconds, but then she calmed down. It was the same attitude:

What the Hell!? I can’t believe you just jumped in the shower with me!

I kept grabbing her the whole time I was in the shower because, well, that’s what you do when you’re naked in the shower with a woman, right? Hey women. Pro tip: If you get naked and take a shower with a man, you need to do some sexual things with him. If you don’t want to do sexual things with the guy, hey, no problem. I get it. But don’t jump in the shower naked with him then!

She kept knocking me away the whole time in the shower, but I did get to bang her a bit for 5-10 seconds, which made it all worthwhile. Then the cunt dared to walk around my apartment naked for two hours! I was grabbing at her the whole time of course because that’s obviously what you do when you have a naked woman wandering about your place, right? She kept pushing me away. After a while she got pissed. I kept grabbing at her anyway. My attitude was,

You don’t want to me grab you? You can put some fucking clothes on baby!

My apartment is enemy territory, ladies!

Finally I caught her shooting speed in my dining room, stark naked. That was it. Out she went.

This whole episode also felt very bad. A naked woman strolling around my place for two hours and refusing to do anything sexual with me. How humiliating!

With a lot of women at stores, I can only have the most minimal conversations. Any time I get into anything remotely personal other than (“Here is my order”), they act weird, uncomprehending, outraged, shocked, disappointed, or anxious, and either stop listening or ignore me. Women ignore me when I try to talk to them all the time now. It can’t tell you how bad that feels.

I can’t look at high school girls at all anymore, and I’ve been looking at them my whole life. Now if I look at them, I get these pure hate looks in return. I have no right to look at JB’s!

I get conversational hard shutdowns constantly.

It’s…deflating.

I so miss being treated like I am attractive by women, women looking at me, smiling, winking, flirting, checking me out, going into zombie stares. I long for that every day, and every day it never happens. I am coming to the horrible conclusion that maybe I am ugly after all. Since age 18, people have been raving over how good-looking I was (especially in my 20’s). It was like everyone wanted me, girls, women, and even men (fags). Now no one wants me. I think I still look good though because a lot of older women say I still look good.

So this is how it feels. This is what being an Omega is like. This is what these poor incels go through every day of their miserable lives, all day long. Fuck. It’s holy depressing as all get out. It would be infuriating too if I did not have my past to fall back on, so it doesn’t make me angry. But I can see how it would enrage a man. I’m just choosing not to get enraged.

I get it. I see why incels commit suicide. In fact, I don’t see how any of them don’t commit suicide. These guys deserve some credit just for hanging in there and carrying on.

And I even understand why they go ER, although of course I cannot support that. It’s amazing more guys haven’t gone ER. I don’t see how there’s only been a few.

People must have an awful lot of self-control.

I’m not surprised at all that so many of these incels hate women. When you are like this, women more or less treat you like serious crap all the time, 24-7, day in and day out as the years stretch on. Well, after months or years of being treated like crap full time by women…it’s obvious that a man would start to hate them, right? I mean why not? Why not hate people who treat you like crap and act like they hate you? Hate makes hate, right? You hit a man enough times, he might just start hitting back, right?

I think I actually get off easy, as women are still very nice to me if I keep it to “Here is my order.” Some of them even call me by name. A lot of women in stores still smile at me when they see me (except I am not allowed to talk to them). Some will even talk to me casually (except no 1

I’ve heard that these incel guys don’t even get smiles from women! Good God. How could anyone live like that?

First above, a Southerner. Famous for her short stories. I recently read a novel excerpt of hers named after a season of the year.

Second above, Southerner who loved his bourbon. Quote: “The past isn’t dead. Hell, it’s not even past.”.

Third above, Canadian? From Ontario? Writes about rural areas a lot?

Fourth above, wrote about New York City and the moral depravity of the rich.

Fifth above, wrote about New England and New York City. Famous short story about a man in the water.

Sixth above, he was also very much a racist. An example of a leftwing racist, a rare breed nowadays but as you can see, they can exist. He was a White Supremacist but most Whites were back then as it was just normal to be like that.

Seventh above, she was also a Black conservative all through her life. Deserves to be better known.

Eighth above, had a serious thing for young women even in middle age. He liked them about 18-23/25, and around the latter age, he completely lost interest in them. Is that an actual ephebophile? Not that ephebophilia is a disorder. Hell, it’s not even abnormal. It seems a bit weird to me though. I still love young women, but older women have their place too and in my experience legal teenage girls and women in their 20’s are notoriously unstable. Not to mention at my age, they’re greedy as Hell and all want to drain my bank account.

Ninth above, to my surprise, I recently found out that she was quite a lesbian, though she doesn’t look it in this picture. I’ve seen another photo though where she is quite mannish and dykey. She also wrote a very famous novel on the subject of homosexuality, perhaps one of the first famous novels on the subject. It was written at around the time of Gore Vidal’s early novel on this subject, Myra Breckenridge.

Tenth above, she was also a deeply religious Catholic and this intense religiously also pulsated throughout her work. Her books have apocalyptic titles that suggest religiosity, violence, or death.

Eleventh above, he was also gay as Hell, very effeminate, and quite obviously out most of his life. He wrote a few “Gothic” novels and a book of short stories like the author above him. They are little known, but they are very beautifully written. Highly recommended!

I don’t know about the way he’s looking at her, but I am convinced that a lot of teenage girls want to fuck their fathers, and this seems to be one of them. Probably a lot of fathers want to fuck their hot teenage daughters too. Generally speaking, neither one acts on it, and it’s probably for the better actually.

I know teenage boys want to fuck their mothers because I was one of them! And I doubt if I was the only one. Of course it never happened and I don’t think I even would have wanted it to.

Why else is every woman calling me “Daddy” lately? Notice how many women start calling you “Daddy” nowadays after you start having sex with them?

Do you know how many women want to do ageplay with me? Lots! I had an 18 year old girlfriend a while back, and she wanted to do that ageplay stuff all the time. She was always the teenage girl and I was always her father, and in the ageplay, he always ended up fucking her. It had to be long and drawn out over hours though, and it had to start out really slow and build very closely. She was always saying, “Not so forward!” I always wanted to cut to the chase or cut to the pussy actually.

She always wanted to make the girl way too young too.

“Ok, I’m a 12 year old girl and you’re my father. You opened the door in my room and caught me masturbating. That’s the scene.”

Me: “No! No! No! She can’t possibly be 12 years old! Forget that! She’s too young!”

The girl wasn’t even real, but I didn’t even want to fuck a 12 year old girl in fantasy.

I had a 12 year old girl walk up to me and openly proposition me – flat out ask me to have sex – with her when I was 20. I thought about it a bit and told her to come back when she was 18! I guess some of them already want to fuck at age 12 if their sex drive and menarche has come on that early, as the female sex drive seems to come on with true menarche (not false menarche).

I’ve tried to have the fantasy of fucking this 12 year old girl over the years because, Hell, why not? I’m a degenerate! There’s not many sexual things I won’t do LOL.

But I could never make it work. I couldn’t even put it in her. There’s something wrong with the picture. I’m too big and she’s too little is the only way I can put it. Ever seen those drawings, “What is wrong with this picture?” and one of the problems is an upside down elephant in a tree or something nuts like that? That’s what it was like. There was “something wrong with the picture.” I couldn’t even do it in fantasy!

I had a 48 year old girlfriend a while back who wanted to do the same thing. The ageplays were really elaborate. The underage daughter and I were having an affair behind Mommy’s back, and the girl was always talking about how much she hated Mommy and how she wanted me to divorce Mommy so she could have me all for herself.

I was always encouraging the daughter to outwhore her mother and do sexual things that daughter would never do. Of course she complied!

She kept making the girls too young though. “Ok, I’m a 14 year old girl and you’re my father…”

Me: “No! No! No! She’s got to be at least 16! No younger!” It wasn’t even real and I didn’t even walk the fake daughter too young.

I’ve been weary of writing these up because the lies just flood out all the time with no seeming end to them at all. I think that is one of the purposes of the flood of lies – eventually you get tired of responding to all of it. The Jews in the Jewish and Israel groups used to do this trick against us all the time, and I had a Libertarian guy in my comments who did the same thing.

Basically you force your opponent to run all over Hell and high water to shoot down the lies that you put up, and you keep putting up new ones all the time. If you say it’s not true, they demand that you prove it. Then you have to waste time running all over the net gathering the info to prove them wrong, while they know all the time that they’ve been lying.

Ever since this war on Russia crap started, I’ve never seen so much lying and out and out false flags, fake attacks, gaslighting, etc. Now they are trying to destroy anyone who puts up a contrary view.

The FSB killed Alexander Dugin’s daughter with a car bomb. Lie. Putin ordered the killing. Lie.

It’s a result of internal Russian politics. Lie.

It’s a Russian false flag to frame Ukraine. Lie.

The crime was “solved too fast” so the suspect is false. Lie.

The Boris Nemtsov assassination remains unsolved for years, so this shows that the rapid accusation of Ukraine is a lie. Lie.

There are two journalists who were also murdered and their crimes have also not been solved for years, therefore the Ukraine accusation is false. Lie.

There’s no evidence against the woman assassin. Lie.

An organization called the National Republican Army committed the blast. Lie.

The National Republican Army is made up of democratic people who want to overthrow Putin. Lie.

The Russian government is about ready to collapse as a result of the bombing. Lie.

Dugin is “Putin’s brain” the most influential man in Russia. Lie.

He called for the murder of Ukrainians by saying, “Kill, kill, kill!” Lie.

Dugin hates Ukrainians on a racial, Nazi-like basis. Lie.

His daughter called for the murder of Ukrainians and advocated that Russia commit war crimes. Lie.

“Russia” has called for massive strikes on Ukraine in revenge. Lie.

Top Kremlin-linked officials have called for massive strikes on Ukraine in revenge. Lie. 

Neither the FSB nor Putin killed Dugina with a car bomb and the killing is not a result of internal Russian politics. There’s no way that any of those people killed her. It’s not a Russian false flag because Russia doesn’t generally do false flags, although they have probably done a few in the past. False flags are done by the losing sides in war to try to get big powers involved in the conflict or to gin up outrage against a particular government. On the contrary, Ukraine, the US, the UK, the EU, and NATO are up to their ears in false flags. I think we should call it the False Flag West at this point.

Yes the crime was solved very fast. It has been compared to the Boris Nemtsov assassination which is supposedly unsolved for years. In fact, that crime was solved rather quickly. The FSB closed in on a house where the killers were hiding and they blew themselves up with suicide vests. They were Chechens. Those men are thought to be the ones who carried out the crime. However, there are theories that the main author of the crime is a top Chechen official who has yet to be charged.

No one quite knows even why he was killed, except perhaps it was the Chechen government, fanatically pro-Putin, eliminating a Putin oppositionist. However, formally the crime has been solved and five suspects are dead.

I don’t know much about the killings of the journalists, but they were killed in the context of reporting on the Chechen War, I believe during the Yeltsin era. Incidentally, far more journalists died under Yeltsin than under Putin. They were writing about human rights violations by the Russian military during this war, of which there were many. The authorship of these murders is not the Russian government and of course it’s not Putin. Instead it seems to lie with the Chechen government. I’m not sure if there have been any arrests in the cases. You could argue that the Russian state doesn’t want the murders solved.

The case being solved quickly may just mean that when the FSB wants to solve a case, they can do so quickly, and when they don’t want to solve a case, they can drag their heels forever. Solving a crime rapidly does not mean that the conclusion is false.

There is actually a lot of evidence against this woman assassin. Russia has already published it, along with photos of the assassin. It was a very well done professional intelligence agency hit job. She appears to be a Ukrainian Nazi spy, operating under the control of the SBU, the very Nazi Ukrainian intelligence agency. This is actually a very good intelligence agency and the CIA and MI6 also work very closely with them.

I would not underestimate them. She is also a member of the heavily-Nazi Ukrainian National Guard. In addition, she is a member of the openly Nazi Azov Battalion who are actually a part of the Ukrainian Army. Keep in mind that 40

There is apparently no such organization as the National Republican Army. It’s a made-up organization by the SBU to deflect responsibility from themselves. There’s no evidence that this group even exists. A former Russian lawmaker who is anti-Putin and supports the Nazi government in Ukraine. This is the man who issued the fake NRA document. He’s apparently working with the SBU. He said that some members of this group were recently rolled up in Russia in a certain city.

The incident he refers to is an arrest of 3-4 Russian Nazi supporters of the Azov Battalion. So apparently this NRA, if it even exists, consists not of democrats opposed to Putin but of actual Nazi supporters of the Ukrainian Nazis! Keep in mind that most of the actual Russian Nazis support Ukraine in this war because, well, Nazis like Nazis.

Putin has cracked down very hard on the Russian Nazis in the last 5-10 years. Most of their organizations are now illegal and a lot of the membership, especially the leadership, is in prison. About 5-6,000 Russian Nazis went over to fight in the Ukrainian Army in this war, so that shows you who the real Nazis support. And as Belarus and Russia cracked down on their homegrown Nazis in the last 5-10 years, please note that many of them ran to Ukraine and asked for asylum, which was quickly granted.

The NRA appears to be a fake organization dreamed up by the SBU. The SBU has been operating in Russia for a long time during this war. They have been recruiting local Russians to attack Russian facilities behind the lines. They have been paying them, but keep in mind that there are quite a few Russians who actually support Ukraine in this war.

Russia is also now full of Ukrainians who Russia has let flood into its country as refugees. This group contains elements of a 5th column. Even if they are only 1

A British paper wrote an article that Putin’s government is on the verge of collapsing. Do all of you dipshits in the West really fall for all this crap? This is war propaganda. Every single thing you read or hear about Russia in the news in the West is some sort of a lie, distortion, or severely biased. Mostly it’s just flat out lies. And here we are, the suckers of the West, falling for every single lie our governments are flushing down our throats! Pathetic!

I would like to point out that another reason for the SBU dreaming up this NRA group is to make it appear that Russia now has a serious insurgency problem. Some “Nazi Left” moron on a Western leftwing TV station said we would have to go back to the Civil War to find insurgents inside Russia.

BS! After WW2 there were Nazi guerillas in the Baltics and Ukraine for a very long time. The Ukrainians were not defeated until 1959. Even Stalin could not defeat them! The Ukrainians started a full fledged class war insurgency in 1932 which was the major cause of the Holodomor fake terror famine that never happened. And of course there were Chechen and other Muslim insurgents rampaging around Russia setting off bombs and killing civilians for many years. And these are just the only ones that I can think of!

So they want to paint this picture of a Russia riven with conflict and deep in an insurgency with a miserable population, a failing and unpopular war, and a collapsing economy. They’ve made up every bit of this, but that’s what intelligence agencies do. Why do you American idiots listen to one word the CIA says? The CIA and MI6 lie all the time as a matter of course. So does the German BND.

Dugin is not Putin’s brain. Many Russians have never even heard of him. He’s much more well-known in the West where he is portrayed as the boogeyman brain trust behind Putin. Putin has never even met Dugin one time! Dugin has never held a position in Putin’s government! Dugin was actually fired from his job as a professor at Moscow University for making inflammatory calls to kill Ukrainians a a time that Russia was trying to push the Minsk Accords.

Dugin’s brand of ultranationalism is not popular. His views is represented by Zhirinovsky, who recently died. That’s the Russian Far Right, which is virtually fascist, and one can make a good case for Dugin being a fascist except that he likes Communism and the USSR! So Dugin’s politics make no sense at all in US right – to – left context.

The only thing it might resemble here in the US is the place where the Far Left meets the Far Right. He was a National Bolshevik for a while and they are called Nazis, but they never supported Nazism or racism. They were just Russian ultranationalists. And Dugin’s not a racist either. Neither was Limonov, the founder of the Nazbols.

It has been reported the Dugin called for the murder of Ukrainians by posting, “Kill, kill, kill!” This was in the context of a crime committed by Ukrainian Nazis with the full support of the Nazi government and most of the Ukrainian population (most Ukrainians could be well described as Nazis of a sort). This crime was where the Nazis herded Communists into a trade union building and then set it on fire, burning them alive.

I was just on Reddit and US liberal Democrats are cheering on this horrendous Nazi crime. The Communists were right when they said, “Scratch a liberal and underneath is a fascist.” The strongest supporters of the Ukrainian Nazis at the moment in the US are liberal Democrats. Think about that for a second. US liberal Democrats are supporting a literal Nazi government!

Anyway, Dugin was calling to kill the people who burned the people in the trade union building, not to kill Ukrainians in general. This terrible crime was very poorly reported in the West and was just described as a battle or street war between two factions and it was said things were very confused about what actually happened. The entire US media covered this Nazi mass murder by burning alive 50 Communists!

Dugin is not a racist. He’s ashamed of his Ukrainian blood, yes, because he says Ukrainians have been poisoned by this Nazi government. Otherwise, he says, they’re great people. This sums up the opinion of most Russians towards Ukrainians. Many millions of Russians have Ukrainian blood and there are many Ukrainians living in Russia as a Ukrainian minority. Most support Putin and a number have written to high positions in the government. Keep in mind that the USSR was run by a Ukrainian for many years.

His daughter called for war crimes tribunals for Azov Battalion members who had committed terrible human rights violations. If they were found guilty, she said they should be executed. That’s not a particularly crazy position, and she certainly didn’t “call for the killing of Ukrainians.”

The media reported the “Russia” or “top officials linked to the Kremlin” were calling for massive retaliation against Ukraine before the author of the crime was even known. First of all, “Russia” did not make these calls. These calls were made by some TV talk show hosts who have a reputation for being huge loudmouths and radicals who regularly say crazy things that the Kremlin would never do.

They’re far more extreme than the government and the government doesn’t listen to these people. They do give you some insight into the views of your average Russian though. These TV talking heads are not top officials and they are not Kremlin-linked at all. In fact they are widely regarded as loudmouths and blowhards who say all sorts of crazy things.

The Putin Administration is actually much more moderate than these talk show people. The West should be grateful that Russia is run by Putin. Were he to be replaced, his replacement would be someone  like these talk show loudmouths. Any possible successors to Putin are guaranteed to be much more radical than he is. Be careful what you wish for, you just might get it!

12 pages.

This is the second part of my response to Daniel’s post about why Game has not worked for him.

Why Hasn’t Game Worked?

I came to the conclusion that the past year was just the universe’s way of testing me to see what I was made of. It had been an excruciating experience because it was meant to give me a taste of suffering so that when I finally did find a girlfriend, it would be that much more special and awesome.

I concluded that whereas 11th grade had been crap, 12th grade would be golden. I would find a girlfriend and enjoy my last year in high school with a girl at my side.

I don’t know what to say. At the beginning of my senior year, I think I was 17 years old. I hadn’t even had PIV sex yet, but I had done some sexual things, and I had had oral sex with a 14 year old girl! LOLZ. That right there made me a hero to my friends because none of them were having any experiences at all.

The girl and I got interrupted in the middle of sex by a stupid moron who we had sent away to get rolling papers as an excuse to get rid of him. I don’t know how it happened, but I got her on top of me as I was sitting back in a chair. My hand was in her pants somehow (no panties?!), and I was banging her. I wouldn’t say it was tight at all. She was wet as Lake Michigan and there seemed to be plenty of room in there.

She pretty soon had my cock out and was jerking on it. She went over to the corner of the roof to take a piss and then slinked her way back to me asking me I wanted to eat her pussy. I said sure and she climbed on top with me still lying back in the chair.

She was a complete animal, as dirty and nasty as any woman or worse, which always makes me laugh when I hear about when men have sex with 14-17 year old teenage girls they get “abused” (yeah right!), they get their “innocence stolen away from them” (Sure! They’re practically porn stars at age 14, but if they have sex with a man, he stole her innocence! What innocence?!).

Anyway, the message for the moron was to get lost, or if he came back with the papers to see us busy and take off, but instead he stood there and yelled out my name, and the girl got turned off and stepped off of me, very quickly saying, “Now I’m not horny anymore.” What an idiot! Then the guy said, “Lindsay, I’m going to think differently about you from now on!” So you see early sexual experiences gets you mad respect.

Look at how quickly they go from horny to not horny! It might be worse with a girl because she is still exploring this mysterious thing called her sexuality and it is still quite mysterious to her why she is thinking and acting in this way or that.

You see a lot of, “Why am I thinking this? Why does this turn me on? What’s going on with me, anyway?” with 14-17 year old girls. This Sexuality Monster has taken over their bodies and even minds to some extent and it’s telling them what to do instead of the other way around, and they’re mystified by the whole process, including why does this or that turn me on or why does this or that turn me off.

Grown women make peace with their sexual minds and just accept them for what they are but I think with a lot of 14-17 year old girls, it’s like this monster or demon has taken them over and it’s as if they are possessed. Not possessed in a bad way, mind you, but possessed nonetheless. Females do not construct their sexual lives and many probably cannot do so. Their sexual lives are dictated to them by evolution, and sexually they are being tugged this way and that like a dog on a leash and they have little power over this monster telling them what to do other than obey or suppress it.

And how somehow automagically if she has sex with a clueless boy she won’t get harmed, but if she goes and seduces some man, she will somehow automagically be harmed for life! How? They’re already practically porn stars at age 14-17, how the Hell is banging some man instead of some boy going to screw them up for life? Get out of here!

Further, primitive societies have been fucking their women from age 13-17 for ever and ever, with the girls typically marrying men. This was even very common in the developed world until recently. I’m not saying men banging 13-14 year old girls is the greatest thing, especially if they get pregnant, as an abortion is mandatory, but otherwise it doesn’t appear to be particularly harmful.

In the Developed World historically and amongst primitive peoples, 13-17 year old girls have habitually had sex with males, typically older men. This has been going on for millennia. We have sent people out to study these people, and no harm has ever been found from this practice. The girls who go through this are studied as women, and they are not damaged in any way from this behavior. Furthermore, 13-17 year old girls married males, often older men, in the Developed World until just recently. I have never read any historical document that said that there was any harm whatsoever associated with this practice. It doesn’t harm them!

All of my sexual stuff was happening around marijuana or pot these days. We would get stoned and often seriously drunk with girls, and then sometimes sexual stuff would happen. We drank Boonesfarm, a type of wine that tastes about like Kool-aid! But it didn’t matter because girls loved it, so you could always get girls to drink it.

But 12th grade went by the exact same way as 11th, except this time I was getting bitter. I couldn’t understand why I had been categorically rejected by the entire female half of the population. I felt trapped with no way out. I kept trying, but the anger of failure was starting to eclipse my hope for success.

I wouldn’t say that I had had an incredible amount of sexual experiences by the start of my senior year, but I had definitely had some! But more importantly, no one else was getting laid at all really. So he wasn’t in much worse shape than I was. So why was he so down and out? By the start of my junior year, I had had almost zero sexual experiences. But I felt good about myself. He’s getting himself into a rut. But also every girl in sight is rejecting him, so it looks like his experience is different from mine.

When senior prom came around, I didn’t even try for a date because I was jaded, and I knew I wouldn’t get one. I thought about busting into the dance with a bunch of water balloons and throwing them at the people. I was really starting to hate the world. At my graduation, I just sat there, miserable, ruminating on how much I hated all of the spoiled, sexually active sluts and jocks.

Good God, what a rut he was in. By graduation, I had had a lot more sex but I still wasn’t incredibly experienced. But he had had zero. Maybe that makes all the difference.

And it was in this context that I stumbled across Double Your Dating by David DeAngelo. Reading DYD opened my eyes up to the whole charade, and I finally understood why girls weren’t liking me.

I was a “wussy.” I was putting girls on pedestals, treating them like queens when they hadn’t earned it and acting hesitant and non-confident.

I don’t know about that. I don’t even know what putting them on pedestals even means! Hesitant and non-confident is not going to work. The good thing about early experiences is it gives you some pretty good confidence which then gets you even more sex. It’s a great base to form the rest of your life on. If you missed out in high school, I don’t know? It’s probably still possible to salvage a decent sex life, but you still missed out on something.

I was thrilled to find out that my looks weren’t as important as I thought they were, and that even a 5’2” socially awkward dork

Yeah, Looks are incredibly important. And his height might be the real killer.

could transform himself into a stud whom women flocked to simply by changing his attitude and developing confidence.

Well, confidence draws females to you if you are attractive. If you are not attractive, it is absolutely worthless, and in fact, most women find it really offensive. I’m apparently not attractive anymore, but I still think I’m hot shit with women. I’ve heard that there are no men who women hate as much as “unattractive man who thinks he’s hot shit.” It’s extremely offensive and women say, “We can see right through it.” They also call them fakes. So Game minus Looks doesn’t seem like it works at all, but I’m open to comments to show me I’m wrong.

The college selection process had been a difficult one.

I had good grades, scored very high on the SAT’s, was active in extracurricular activities and a talented writer, and I could have gotten into 95

So I just bought plain, simple t-shirts, shirts that had funny sayings on the front. Either that or I let my Mom pick my clothes out for me.

Most boys and men are crappy clothes shoppers.

In the summer before college, I read and studied David DeAngelo’s materials. I went to the mall to practice talking to girls and delivering cocky funny lines. Keep in mind, this was in the era before the pickup arts hit the mainstream – before Strauss’s The Game, before VH1‘s Pickup Artist.

It was so new and unheard of that the line, “Excuse me, I need a female opinion – who lies more, men or women?” actually worked. Stock openers actually got girls interested because they had truly never heard such things before!

I’ve never used canned lines in my life as openers, and I’ve done great with women. There’s something about the lack of spontaneity. Plus, I can usually think up some good lines if I am just with her and we start flirting because that’s the way I am. I know how to talk to women. In fact, I am an expert at it, but right now, it’s pretty useless, and all it does is make them offended and angry. Plus, I can flirt with about 0

When I got to college, I was prepared. I had an arsenal of cocky-funny lines, positive self-affirmations, attitudes and techniques, and success stories from other guys to keep me motivated and optimistic. I felt like I had been given the keys to a secret society, and life would be the polar opposite of what it had been up to that point.

As soon as I arrived on campus, I hit the ground running. I used everything I had learned from David D. I “used my amazing brain to figure out ways to succeed, rather than reasons to fail.” I walked around campus thinking, “I’m the Alpha male. I’ve got the secret knowledge that none of them know. I’m a rock star. I can get any woman. They all want me.”

These are very good affirmations and I still use them to this day, however, at this late date, they are completely worthless, and like I said, when I get into these moods, it just makes women think I’m being “creepy.” However, in the past they worked very, very well. I was using affirmations like this starting at about age 18. They can make me do a lot better, that’s for sure.

I repeated these affirmations constantly, and I adopted the body language to back it up.

Body language is important too. I’ve been practicing it for years, and I have it down. But now if I use seductive, sexy body language, women just act angry and offended like they think it is creepy. I don’t even have to say anything! Just standing there is bad enough!

And I was a star. Girls were into me. They were talking to me. Every time I hit them with a cocky-funny line, they would look at me like, “Omg, who are you?”, and they would suddenly start touching me and asking me questions about myself.

All right, here’s where he’s blowing it. Once they start putting their hands on you, you need to start doing something about that. For one thing, you need to lay down the attitude that you are not a piece of meat at the supermarket that she can fondle at her leisure. There has to be consequences to all this touching, like you are going to touch her back. If she starts touching you, you start touching her! If it’s right for her, it’s right for you! But you start out real slow and inoffensively. Also you make the whole thing like a big joke. This is essential.

Also when they start doing this, putting their hands on you and asking you about yourself, you have to turn it into flirtation. “I want to know everything about you!” usually means she is in love with you, has the hots for you, or wants to fuck you. Often means she’s in love. I’ve heard it quite a few times. Women only say that about men they have the serious hots for.

All seduction must be treated as humor for some reason. I don’t know why? Perhaps seduction is funny. Perhaps sex is funny. People do laugh a lot when they are flirting and doing sexual things, even when are having actual sex. I’m not sure why this is, but the humor takes a lot of #Metoo bullshit weight off of the situation. #Metoo is only happening because people are very, very serious. If people were lighthearted and easy going, most of this #Metoo crap wouldn’t even be happening, because relaxed people don’t get offended. Only uptight idiots get offended easily.

If she doesn’t like it, then act offended and tell her to quit touching you. Tell her, “If you touch me, I get to touch you. Those are the rules.” But make it sound like a joke.

One girl asked me out and offered to pay for my lunch!

Good, excellent, so what happened. I would make a joke out of that too. I would ask her if I am her gigolo now. That usually works pretty good. They actually like the idea of being in the driver’s seat. You have to make dates sexual otherwise they are pretty worthless. Nonsexual dates are garbage. What’s the point? The whole reason any kind of dating, lunch, dinner or otherwise, is to get ready to fuck. There’s literally no other reason for any human to date another human. If there’s no sex involved, it’s not dating, and platonic friendships with women can get into a bad rut real fast.

Main thing about a first date, especially a lame lunch date, is to turn it into a real date, or Date #2. That would be a night date of some kind.

In every class, I talked to the girls I was attracted to, hit them with cocky-funny, and got amazingly positive responses.

Ok, but no sexual interest? I’m not getting this. If this were happening to me, there would be sexual interest. Women don’t even act this way towards me usually without some sort of sexual interest. If they don’t have that interest, they won’t give me these positive responses.

In my dorm, I was a minor celebrity. My confidence and attitude blew people away, and I was popular for the first time in my life.

Perfect. Now you have to throw a sexual element in there otherwise this is just worthless in my opinion. What’s popularity without sexual attraction? That’s worthless to me.

But I was afraid to escalate because I didn’t want to come across as “pursuing.” David D taught me that guys aren’t supposed to pursue girls – we’re supposed to just act really cool and let the women pursue US. This led to a sort of conundrum because eventually I had to show some interest, right?

All right, this David D is an idiot. I assume the D stands for Dumbshit. No, you do should not be afraid to escalate, though I have been in this situation many times myself. What’s wrong with pursuing? Yeah, guys are supposed to pursue women. That’s the only way you get any sex at all. Otherwise you die a virgin like what might be this guy’s fate.

No, do not act really cool and let them pursue you, though in some cases, that works pretty well. You can do this with female friends if the relationship is “unspecified,” and you “leave the door open” to expanding the relation to sex at some point. That works pretty well. Women like to take charge and be in the driver’s seat. Women don’t really pursue men. Sure, I’ve had some pursue me over time, but definitely many more times, I had to pursue them. Most guys will never get asked out by a woman in their lives, I’m afraid. Men regard that as a rare circumstance that almost never happens.

I couldn’t just be cocky and aloof forever – eventually I had to drop some hint that I wanted the girl. But I didn’t know how to transition from one attitude to the other.

Simple, you more or less start it off sexually from the very start, or at least you let her know that that’s where you definitely want to take this thing anytime. Don’t start out with the innocent friend thing. I did this in high school some, and it was ok, but that was high school.

On the rare occasion that I did, it would totally screw things up. If I showed any interest in a girl, things went quickly downhill.

Maybe he waited too long. No idea! You don’t start it out as friends and then later try to transition it to sexual stuff. It either starts out friends and stays friends or it starts out sexual and stays sexual. Friendships with women don’t usually turn sexual especially if you have both decided on a platonic friendship. Once that’s been agreed to, it never turns into sex. Friendzoned is a permanent state. There’s no recovery from it.

As long as I was aloof, girls respected me and pursued my attention, but when I displayed any interest in them at all, they lost their interest in me.

Hmmm. I don’t like this playing aloof BS. That seems dumb. You have to let women know where you stand with them pretty damn fast. Then they can decide what to do about that, if anything. But you have to lay it out there that you can take it in that direction any time you want.

Charges: Russia is endangering the Endorgar Nuclear Plant. Lie.

Russia is shelling the plant. Lie.

Russia has planted explosives around the plant. Lie.

Russia is planning a false flag at the plant. Lie.

There is a terrible risk at the plant and it must be demilitarized. Lie.

The plant has been turned into a Russian base. Lie.

Russia is shelling from right around the plant and using the plant as a refuge. Lie.

There is a huge risk of massive contamination at the plant. Lie.

Russia is not shelling the plant. Ukraine is. In fact, Ukraine has even admitted it and Zelensky himself has admitted that his own forces are shelling the plant. Then they turned around and said the Russians are doing it. Fragments of Western shells were found at the base. Russia does not possess these shells. Everyone at the base and around the base says Ukrainians are shelling the base in order to create a crisis. Ukraine is losing the war and they are playing nuclear blackmail to try to get NATO involved. Also, Russia occupies the plant. Why would they shoot at their own people? It makes no sense!

Russia has not planted explosives at the plant. Why on Earth would they do that? Because they’re depraved? See? Depravity is an essential ingredient in all false flags.

Russia is not planning a false flag at the plant. Russia doesn’t even do false flags. It’s the US and NATO that do false flags. Incidentally, I have never seen the US do more false flags than since this New Cold War with Russia took off. It seems to have made the US and the West hysterical and freaked out. And NATO does false flags and misattributes attacks constantly as does the EU. And the MI6 British intelligence agency is a master of false flags. The entire West is depraved in this sense. The West should be called the West of Lies, the West of False Flags, and the West of Fake Attacks.

There is no terrible risk to the plant. You could fly a 747 jet airliner into that reactor and nothing would happen. Russia is not planning to shut the reactor off. That would be stupid. Even the shelling only poses a risk to nuclear waste at the plant and that only risks the surrounding city, not all of Europe. So there is no risk to Europe and the world of a nuclear catastrophe. Even Russia is lying about this. This whole mess is a manufactured crisis. There’s nothing going on here!

Russia has not turned the plant into a base. There is just enough Russian military there to secure the facility and no more.

Russia is not shelling from the plant or right around the plant and using the plant as a base to hide in. Russian shelling is situated a bit a ways from the plant.

There is no huge risk of contamination at the plant. See above for more.

Jason: Thanks a ton for this post! How do you crank out what seems like 20-30,000 words of original content every month so easily? I am a writer myself and I can barely get past 10k. I think I need to start reading a lot more.

I love to write. I’m a real writer; a born writer. I’m often blocked but once I start writing the block goes away pretty quickly. Once I start writing, I start to really like my prose, and it just keeps me writing. My main problem is I can’t stop and I write way too much. I have so many ideas floating around in my head all the time that there’s no way I get anywhere near to all of them on paper. I walk around all day long with ideas in my head of what I want to write about. I’m often even fashioning nice sentences in my head. If I want to make some sort of an intellectual analytical argument,

I read a lot, especially news. While reading the news, I often think”I need to write an article about this.” Then I think of exactly what I would like to say about it. Only a small percentage of posts that I want to write get written.

If you are blocked,I would say just sit down and start writing. That clears my block up pretty quickly.

I have started to read a lot more now, especially literature and literary fiction, though I read all kinds of everything, including a lot of physical books. I have been going to a site called Lithub where they have excerpts of novels and short stories, mostly current but some classic and historical. I’ve been reading a lot of that stuff, and I’ve also been reading other lit. Below, the novel excerpts are 5-20 pages or average 12 pages, the short stories are 12-15 pages, the nonfiction is 40 pages, and the essays were 1-5 pages.

It seems that if I am blocked, I sit back and relax and read good literary prose and don’t thinking of anything else and then go back later, maybe the next day or so. I should also say that the reading should be enjoyable, like relaxing on a beach or going on vacation. You’re supposed to be having a good time, not working or doing schoolwork or drudgery. You’re just kicking back and enjoying yourself leisurely.

The reading seems to “supercharge me” somehow or other, I’m not quite sure how. It’s sort of like the more you read, the more you write. I’d say that’s particularly true of good literary prose. I don’t read much poetry, so I don’t see how that works. Obviously I only write nonfiction here, but it seems that if I read some excellent literary fiction, it puts me in a good mood to write my nonfiction on here.

Anyone have any idea of how that works? The more you read, the more you write? If you want to write a lot, read a lot?

What I’ve Been Reading Lately

The weird thing is I always chide myself for not reading enough and for being way too slow of a reader. According to myself, I’m an incompetent reader because I’m too damn slow and I just don’t read enough. I’m basically a failed reader. But see below.

The section up to the introductions covers 3,060 pages (!). The introductions are 2,400 pages. The essays were 80 pages. That’s 5,535 pages! I’ve read over 5,500 pages of books just recently! I had no idea I read so much! Also this doesn’t include a lot of introductions and prologues to books that I haven’t read yet. Didn’t even bother to count those. This is some great stuff down below. If you’ve read any of these folks, heard of them, want to read them, or want to discuss anything about any of them, feel free to do so in the comments.

Henry James: Autobiography. A Small Boy and Others.

Virginia Woolf: Short Story. The Orchard.

Robert Coover: Novel Excerpt, Short Story. Getting a Beer, The Origin of the Brunists.

Hemingway (just finished a 600 page book): Short story. Book of short stories – Complete Short Stories of Ernest Hemingway.

John Colapinto. Sexology. As Nature Made Him: The Boy Who Was Raised as a Girl. 279 pages (finished).

John Updike: Short Story. Pigeon Feathers and Other Stories.

John Barth: Short Story. Lost in the Funhouse

Donald Barthelme: Short Story. Unspeakable Practice, Unimaginable Acts; Come Back, Doctor Caligari

Anton Chekhov: Short Story. The School Mistress and Other Stories.

Maupassant: Short Story. Menuet.

George Simenon: Novel Excerpt. The Mahe Circle.

F. Scott Fitzgerald: Short Story. Flappers and Philosophers.

Ambrose Bierce: Short Story. The Parenticide Club.

Mary Shelly: Novel Excerpt. Frankenstein.

Leonard Gardner: Novel Excerpt. Fat City.

John Giono: Novel Excerpt. The Hill.

Joyce Carol Oates (reading a lot of her): Short Story. Night-Side. Wild Nights!: Stories About the Last Days of Poe, Dickinson, Twain, James, and Hemingway.

Saul Bellow: Short Story. Seize the Day.

Nathaniel Hawthorne: Short Story. The Maypole of Merry Mount.

James Joyce: Short Story. Dubliners.

Jorge Luis Borges: Short Story. Labyrinths, A Personal Anthology.

Mario Vargas Llosa: Novel Excerpt. Harsh Times.

Vladimir Nabokov: Short Story, Letters. Nabokov’s Dozen, Letters to Vera.

William Faulkner: Short Story. Collected Stories of William Faulkner.

Carson McCullers: Short Story. The Ballad of the Sad Cafe.

Richard Wright: Short Story. The Man Who Lived Underground.

Charles Baudelaire: Novel Excerpt. Paris Spleen.

Haruki Murakami: Novel Excerpt. Pinball.

Marlon James: Novel Excerpt. A Brief History of Seven Killings.

Mohsin Hamid: Novel Excerpt. The Last White Man.

Marguerite Duras: Novel Excerpt. L’Amour.

Ali Smith: Novel Excerpt. Autumn.

T. Corraghessian Boyle: Short Story. The Relive Box & Other Stories.

Richard Russo: Short Story. Trajectory: Stories.

Cesar Aira: Short Story. The Musical Brain.

William Gass: Novel Excerpt. The Eye.

John Banville: Novel Excerpt. The Blue Guitar.

Emily St. John Mandel: Novel Excerpt. Station Eleven.

Edith Wharton: Novel Excerpt. Summer.

J. P. Donleavy: Novel Excerpt. The Ginger Man.

Barbara Comyns: Novel Excerpt. All Our Spoons Came from Woolworth’s.

Ben Lerner: Novel Excerpt. 10:04.

Tahar Ben Jalloun: Novel Excerpt. The Happy Marriage.

Hanya Yanagihara: Novel Excerpt. A Little Life.

Han Kang: Novel Excerpt. The Vegetarian.

Edmund White: Novel Excerpt. A Previous Life. Our Young Man. Latter is gay but good writing.

Andrew Hollerhan: Novel Excerpt. The Kingdom of Sand. Gay but tolerable, actually rather sad and wistful, beautiful writing.

Ursula Le Guin: Novel Excerpt. The Malafrena.

Sigizmund Krzhizhanovsky: Novel Excerpt. The Return of Munchausen.

Carlos Fuentes: Novel Excerpt. Nietzsche on the Balcony.

Jeff Vandermeer: Novel Excerpt. The Borne.

Jennifer Egan: Novel Excerpt. Manhattan Beach.

Hans Fallada: Novel Excerpt. Nightmare in Berlin.

László Krasznahorkai: Novel Excerpt. The World Goes On.

Julia Kristeva: Novel Excerpt. The Enchanted Clock.

Dino Buzzati: Short Story. Catastrophe and Other Stories.

James Wood: Nonfiction, literary criticism. The Nearest Thing to Life.

John Ashberry: Poem.

Gerald Murnane: Novel Excerpt. The Collected Short Fictions of Gerald Murnane.

James McPherson: Short Story. Hue and Cry.

Olga Tokarczuk: Novel Excerpt. The Books of Jacob.

Alessandro Manzoni: Novel Excerpt. The Betrothed.

J. M. Coetzee: Novel Excerpt. The Death of Jesus.

Elena Ferrante: Novel Excerpt. The Lying Life of Adults.

Don DeLillo: Novel Excerpt. The Silence.

Kazuo Ishiguru: Novel Excerpt. Klara and the Sun.

Roberto Bolano: Novel Excerpt. Cowboy Graves.

Rikki Ducornet: Novel Excerpt. Trafik.

Yan Lianke: Novel Excerpt. Hard Like Water.

George Stewart: Novel Excerpt. The Storm.

Ha Jin: Novel Excerpt. A Song Everlasting.

Colin Whitehead: Novel Excerpt. Harlem Shuffle.

Claire Messud: Novel Excerpt. A Dream Life.

Clarice Lispector: Short Story. The Complete Stories.

John Waters: Novel Excerpt. Dirtmouth.

Pat Conroy: Novel Excerpt. Beach Music, The King of Tides.

Adam Gopnik: Essays. From Paris to the Moon. 170 pages.

John Irving: Essays, Short Stories. Trying to Save Peggy Sneed. 300 pages.

Joseph Conrad: Novel. Lord Jim. 90 pages.

Barbara Kingsolver: Essays. High Tide in Tuscon. 150 pages.

Ralph Nader and Wesley J. Smith: Law. No Contest: Corporate Lawyers and the Perversion of Justice in America. 185 pages.

Isaiah Berlin: Political science. Karl Marx. 45 pages.

Richard Hofstadter: Political science. Violence in America. 45 pages.

Kurt Vonnegut: Short Story. Welcome to the Monkey House. 34 pages.

Introductions

Homer: Epic Poem. The Iliad. 42 pages.

Arthur Miller: Play. The Crucible. 27 pages.

Catallus: Poems. The Poems of Catallus. 51 pages.

Georges Lefebvre: History. The Coming of the French Revolution. 25 pages.

Ferdowski: Epic Poem. The Persian Book of Kings. 39 pages.

Julian Jaynes: Psychology. The Origin of Consciousness in the Breakdown of the Bicameral Mind. 22 pages.

Bernard Lewis: History. The Middle East. 22 pages.

Frank Norris: Novel. The Octopus. 37 pages.

Ernest Shackleton: Memoir. South: The Endurance Expedition. 24 pages.

Alexis de Tocqueville: Political Science. Memoir on Pauperism. 38 pages.

Shakespeare: Play. Othello. 47 pages.

Jean Rhys: Novel. Wide Sargasso Sea. 18 pages.

Abraham Verghese: Novel. Cutting for Stone. 14 pages.

Abraham Verghese: Novel. The Tennis Partner. 14 pages.

Bob Woodward and Scott Armstrong: Journalism. The Brethren: Inside the Supreme Court. 28 pages.

Gail Godwin: Novel. A Southern Family. 15 pages.

Joanne Harris: Novel. Coastliners. 18 pages.

Emile Durkheim: Sociology. Suicide: A Study in Sociology. 58 pages.

Georgio Vasari: Art History. The Lives of the Artists. 46 pages.

Edmundo de Amicis: Novel. Love and Gymnastics. 33 pages.

Eric Walberg: Political Science. Postmodern Imperialism: Geopolitics and the Great Games. 32 pages.

Bob Woodward and Carl Bernstein: Journalism. The Final Days. 22 pages.

Vladimir Nabokov: Literary Criticism. Lectures on Literature. 29 pages.

Aldo Leopold: Nature. A Sand County Almanac. 30 pages.

Robert Louis Stevenson: Novel. Treasure Island. 12 pages.

Cicero: Political Science. Selected Political Speeches. 48 pages.

Anna Seghurs: Novel. Transit. 17 pages.

Denis Donoghue: Literary Criticism. William Butler Yeats. 25 pages.

John Muir: Nature. The Mountains of California. 34 pages.

Anthony Trollope: Novel. The Warden. 35 pages.

Arthur Conan Doyle: Novel. The Valley of Fear. 18 pages.

Willa Cather: Travel. Willa Cather in Europe. 14 pages.

Antony Beevor: History. The Fall of Berlin. 39 pages.

Vicki Constantine Croke: History. Elephant Company. 16 pages.

Lawrence Wright: Journalism. Going Clear: Scientology, Hollywood, and the Prison of Belief. 17 pages.

George Murphy: Essays. The Key West Reader. 28 pages.

David Halberstam: Journalism. The Powers That Be. 22 pages.

Frederick Douglass: Autobiography. Narrative of the Life of Frederick Douglass. 19 pages.

George Simmel: Sociology. On Individuality and Social Forms. 67 pages.

Emile Durkheim: Sociology. The Division of Labor in Society. 92 pages.

Rabelais: Novel. Gargantua and Pantagruel. 22 pages.

Anthony Beevor: History. The Battle of Spain: The Spanish Civil War 1936-1939. 36 pages.

David Lavender: History. California: Land of New Beginnings. 27 pages.

Amor Towles: Novel. Rules of Civility. 14 pages.

Andre Maurois: Biography. Prometheus: The Life of Balzac. 18 pages.

Tom Reiss. Biography. Black Count: Glory, Revolution, Betrayal, and the Real Count of Monte Cristo. 105 pages.

Raymond Chandler. Short Stories. Trouble Is My Business. 13 pages.

George Orwell. Memoir. Homage to Catalonia. 47 pages.

William Saroyan. Short Stories. The Human Comedy. 12 pages.

Jeanne Wakatsuki: Memoir. Farewell to Manzanar. 15 pages.

Oscar Wilde: Novel. The Picture of Dorian Gray. 26 pages.

Shillinglaw, Susan: Literary Criticism. On Reading the Grapes of Wrath. 18 pages.

David Maranis: History. They Marched into Sunlight: War and Peace, Vietnam and America, October 1967. 28 pages.

Siddhartha Mukherjee: Medicine. The Emperor of Maladies: A Biography of Cancer. 95 pages.

Robert F. Kennedy, Jr.: Politics. Crimes against Nature: How George W. Bush and His Corporate Pals Are Plundering the Country and Hijacking Our Democracy. 66 pages.

Sir Thomas Mallory: Chronicle. Le Mort d’Arthur. 36 pages.

James Joyce: Novel. Ulysses. 17 pages.

Theodora Kroeber: Legends. The Inland Whale: Nine Stories Retold from California Indian Legends. 18 pages.

Showan Khurshid: Political Science, Dissertation. Knowledge Processing, Creativity, and Politics: A Political Theory Based on Evolutionary Theory. 124 pages.

Anthony Daniels: Travel. Coups and Cocaine: Journeys in South America. 34 pages.

Carl Jung: Psychology. Answer to Job. 17 pages.

Elizabeth Hamilton. Novel. Translation of the Letters of a Hindu Rajah. 56 pages.

Wallace Fowlie: Short Stories French Stories: Ten Short Stories by Voltaire, Balzac, Gide, Camus, and Others. 107 pages.

Edgar Allan Poe: Poems. Poe. 44 pages.

Frederick Nietzsche: Twilight of the Idols. 24 pages.

James Thurber and E. B. White: Humor. Is Sex Necessary? 35 pages.

Linda Wolfe: True Crime. The Professor and the Prostitute and Other Tales of Murder and Madness. 24 pages.

Ernest Hemingway: Quote Collection. Ernest Hemingway on Writing. 15 pages.

Sue Miller: Short Stories. The Best American Short Stories 2002. 24 pages.

Richard Russo: Novel. Empire Falls. 20 pages.

Rick Braggs: Memoir. All Over but the Shoutin’. 26 pages.

Essays

Dylan Thomas: Essay. Quite Early One Morning.

Wallace Stegner: Essay. Wolf Willow.

Studs Terkel: Essay. Working.

Joan Didion: Essay. Slouching towards Bethlehem.

Ralph Emerson: Essay. Emerson’s Journals.

Henry Thoreau: Essay. The Journal.

William James: Essay. The Letters of William James.

Ben Franklin: Essay. The Convenience of Being “Reasonable.”

Francis Bacon: Essay. On Revenge, Of Simulation and Dissimulation.

John Donne: Essay. Men Are Sleeping Prisoners, Tentation, Let Me Wither.

Laurence Sterne: Essay. Of Door Hinges and Life in General, Conjugation.

Samuel Johnson: Essay. The Pyramids, On Self-Love and Indolence.

Charles Lamb: Essay. The Two Races of Man.

Thomas De Quincey: Essay. The Literature of Knowledge and the Literature of Power.

John Newman: Essay. The Idea of the University. Knowledge in General.

James Thurber: Essay. Thurber’s Dogs.

E. B. White: Essay. The Wild Flag, One Man’s Meat, The Second Tree from the Corner.

John Steinbeck: Essay. Journal of a Novel: The East of Eden Letters.

Tom Wolfe: Essay. Kandy Colored Tangerine Flake Streamline Baby.

Robert Pirsig: Essay. Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance.

Jonathan Schell: Essay. The Time of Illusion.

George Orwell: Essay. Shooting an Elephant and Other Essays.

E. M. Forster: Essay. Two Cheers for Democracy.

Robert Coles: Essay. The Middle Americans.

John Updike: Assorted Prose.

Mark Twain: Essay. Advice to Youth.

Charles Dickens: Essay. Crumpets and Principle.

Jonathon Swift: The Spider and the Bee.

W. S. Merwin: Essay. The Miner’s Pale Children.

Virginia Woolf: The Second Common Reader.

Oscar Wilde: Essay. Picture of Dorian Gray.

Martin Buber: Essay. Tales of the Hasidim.

Eldridge Cleaver: Essay. Soul on Ice.

Lewis Thomas: Essay. The Lives of a Cell.

Soren Kierkegaard: Essay. Fear and Trembling.

George Santayana: Essay. Soliloquies in England and Later Soliloquies.

I guess my life is actually a lot better than those poor incels after all. I’ve had three women ask me to do threeways with them just recently. Met one on Kik, one on Tinder, and one on another site.

The first one was on Tinder, 27, years old, White, and hot. She came to me and it wasn’t long before she said,

Let’s forget the small talk and get to the point. I’m looking to suck two guys’ cocks.

LOL I can’t believe what sluts women are, not that that’s a bad thing.

All you have to bring is your cock. I’ll supply the other cock.

She wanted me to come over right away or that night and I hesitated, so she went away. But I’m not sure I want to be naked with some other guy while she sucks both of our cocks! That sounds so weird and creepy, and plus I’m really homophobic LOL.

The next one was on Kik. I think I was in some site for Southern California. This woman just comes to me from the group out of the blue. She looked good, 42 years old, White. She lived in Palm Desert. We didn’t talk long before she said,

You’re hot. I want to fuck you. I’m coming over right now!

LOL. She was in Palm Desert and she wanted to know how far away it was. Turned out it was six hours away, which was fine with her. Only one catch.

If I’m going to drive all that way, I want more than one cock. Do you have any friends? For that distance, I need to fuck at least two guys.

Well, I didn’t have any perverted male friends who I wanted to share her with. I asked my brother but he bailed out and I’m not sure I want to have group sex with my own brother involved anyway. How creepy! Anyway, I couldn’t supply the extra guy, so she took off.

The third one was just recently on a site I hang out on the name of which I will not reveal, 28, Hispanic, a bit heavy but not too much. A huge slut LOL. I went to talk to her on the instant messenger. She had a huge older man fetish. She said,

“Damn, you’re handsome. Hell yeah I will fuck you. Only one catch. My husband is in on this. He going to be in the same room, either watching or joining in, your choice.”

I really don’t like the idea of the husband in the same room watching me. It seems so weird! And him joining in? Eek. Actually I am still thinking about that, but I think she took off.

I’ve had a ton of sex in my life but this 3way stuff seems kind of weird. But it seems like women are getting more and more perverted all the time. I blame all this porn that they’re watching. It’s turning a lot of them into huge sluts LOL. It was never like this when I was young and I’m not sure if that’s a good or bad thing.

 

 

 

This is from a good friend of mine, a young Black guy I am mentoring. We have all sorts of great discussions. As you can see, I am such a horrible racist that I mentor young Black guys! How many racists do that? This also looks like a pretty well structured society, which seems to belie the myth that these people were complete savages pre-contact. They actually had a fairly elaborate system of social and political organization.

My few Afrocentrist readers like Hucipher might be especially interested in this:

The Social Order of Pre-contact Igbo Society

Negro Major – This could either refer to the King Priest or the Judge Priest depending on which Igbo system you are talking about. The King Priest would be the only real political figure in centralized Igbo society, possibly playing the role of “Loyal Patron” or “Grand Manipulator.” In the case of the Awka, the major Igbo tribe who sold slaves, he was probably the latter; with the Nri, a tribe where slaves ran to be free, the former.

Judge Priest – The Judge Priest of decentralized Igbo society was closer to what we would call a judge or priest in our own societies. While he was seen as a man of power, he didn’t hold an executive role.

Negro Concilium – These would be the heads of village families who participated as a council. Not only did their political role make their organization democratic, but throughout the status system, this group was the focal point where things were kept “egalitarian yet complex,” possibly the best way to describe this system.

In order to retain this status, one must have good communication skills, be what we might call “fluent speakers”, and had to maintain discipline in their administrative role.

Negro Plebeian – These would be the various tradesmen who were disciplined in their crafts and developed a hard work ethic.

Negro Minor – Younger members who were fodder for the other roles.

Negro Vulgus – Murderers, thieves, and possibly rapists who broke the laws of their societies. These were actually looked down upon in Black societies that had an active system law enforcement, such as the Ashanti or the Igbo, and the Malians under Ibn Battuta who developed a system of law and order due to a religious culture. However, domestic abuse probably evoked little concern.

A letter from the resident of Bucha. It talks about the Ukrainian Army attacking their own people, systematically looting their apartments and houses, and killing them in a random fashion

This document, titled, “A Cry from the Soul” was sent by the resident to a priest who he asked to publish it. Eventually, the priest himself had to flee the Ukrainian government probably because of death threats. The Ukrainian government issues death threats to lots of people all the time and they’ve been doing this ever since the CIA coup in 2014. Somehow it got into the hands of this person who knows the resident, and he published it.

Good afternoon. I am a citizen of Ukraine, I am in Kyiv. We evacuated from Bucha on March 12. Our apartment in a complex of 250 apartments is completely looted. The Ukrainian press accuses the “Russian orcs” of this looting, and at first, people believed it. .

But a week has passed, and those single neighbors who still live in the house will tell you, in a whisper, after you swear on your life not to tell anyone, how horrified they were by the actions of the Ukrainian government in that. They whisper and act terrified because they think that if the Ukrainian government overhears them talking about these crimes, they will be arrested, beaten, tortured, or killed.

The Russians left Bucha on March 30th (RL: That was their first mistake). On the 31st, in the evening, the looting began. A brigade of more than 10 people in civilian clothes did the looting, but they were guarded and commanded by the military of the Armed Forces of Ukraine around the clock. At night, they worked by headlamps. In the evening they brought two shifts. They looted our apartments for three days – April 31, 1, and 2. All apartments were broken into and looted except for four where there were people living in them.

Everyone in town knows about this looting. But they are silent, even those whose relatives serve in the Armed Forces of Ukraine and the police! Everyone is immersed in animal fear! When women meet soldiers, they bow to them, and with horror in their eyes, they begin to cry and say “Thank you” in a trembling voice. Because they know that the Ukrainian military kills its own people at any time without warning.

Four out of six corpses found in the basement of a neighboring house were identified yesterday in Bucha (RL: A photograph of this scene was taken and I have seen it. The media reported it as people who were executed by the Russians, but I never thought that made since. Now we see that these were the people who were breaking open the apartments so the Ukrainian army could loot them. They were apparently killed to eliminate witnesses).

Two of them turned out to be door installers, and two were locksmiths! This is the elimination of witnesses. They killed the marauders who worked for three days for the Armed Forces of Ukraine”! The army kills its own people (RL: You people wonder why I call them Nazis? The regime is beastly and so is every Ukrainian infected with this Nazi Ukrainian nationalism psychosis)!

Now, our family has (or rather had) a dacha in a large village near Kiev. I got through to a neighbor. The village was destroyed. Every third house was demolished. Many people were evacuated when the Russians opened up a green corridor. Only those who had cows remained. Our own village was looted by the Armed Forces of Ukraine which entered as soon as the Russian troops retreated!

(RL: I must admit that I’m not understanding why the Ukrainian army is looting their own cities and towns that got occupied by Russians. Are they doing it to blame the Russians? The army is as psychotic as the population).

Ten days. All of the houses were broken into and looted! People are silent. A female neighbor with small grandchildren went to Malin to visit his daughter. He handed over his cow and chicken to the care of a neighbor.

The neighbor saw that our own army were looting furniture from her own house and ran to them, yelling “Boys, why are you looting the houses of your own people?!!” She was immediately shot. Her husband too! Why did they kill Baba Masha???

The group of Armed Forces of Ukraine that entered our village was made up of 70-80 people, and they all participated in the looting or killing of their own people! Is that fascism? No, it is not fascism. Even the Nazis did not rob or kill their own! This is Satanism! It is fierce, senseless, and merciless! They are not our people; they are non-humans!

(RL: It is true that the particularly twisted type of Nazism and fascism that constitutes Ukrainian nationalism has long had Satanic overtones, but a lot of fascism does. Even the Nazis were into “the esoteric arts.” Anton La Vey’s Church of Satan has long had links to fascism that are well-documented.

I hate to bash fascists, but I think a good case can be made that fascism itself at least contains the seeds of a worship of evil. Fascism seems to deny that humans have the potential for good. That’s what the hatred of democracy is about.

Instead we go at it, tooth to tooth and claw to claw, and the strong survive and the weak are killed or die. Life for most is short, nasty, and brutish. It’s always the latter two, but if you are a strong enough, you can dodge death for a while, but yours will come. Fascism also has tendencies of a death cult. We know it worships violence, but it also seems to worship death. Fascism worships violence, death, and evil and reverts us back to our primitive hunter-gatherer tribal existence.

Fascism is all about social Darwinism, which is why a “socialist fascism” or Communist fascism” never seems to work very well, except when it’s framed as “socialism for ours only and nothing for everyone else, who are either enemies or need to take care of themselves.” If you like fascism but you don’t love evil or think in terms of social Darwinism, I guess I would ask you why you are a fascist in the first place.)

The military couldn’t understand that in the village, although there were not many left, there yet remained a few residents. They have been sitting in their huts for 10 days and they have seen what you have been doing in our village! The neighbors see your crimes. Bastards.

(RL: I’m still trying to figure out why the military did this. We know that the treat the people who stay behind when the Russians take a town as collaborators and traitors. The idea is that any non-traitor would leave town as soon as the Russians showed up. If you stay behind it must mean you like them. But then they seemed to be looting the homes of people who fled too.

This I can’t understand at all, unless this military is depraved and, as noted above, Satanic. I’m thinking perhaps that they punish any town or city gets taken over by the Russians. This is what happens if you city or town falls to the Russians! It gets looted and destroyed! It will make people want to keep the Ukrainian army in control and dislike it when the Russians come in. It’s not the greatest argument but it’s all I can come up with).

There are about 3,000 people left in Bucha and about 40 left in our village. These people have seen everything, they know everything, and will tell everything! You will not be able to kill all the witnesses of your fierce Satanism. Even if you return, you will not kill everyone! The people cannot be killed.

Thank God the Russians decided to pull out of Kyiv. This decision by them was God’s admonition. It put everything in its place. And most importantly, over the past three weeks, our family has lost everything. We lost the apartment that we purchased over a 17 year period. We lost the dacha we took 20 years to build, investing our souls in the work. We lost our the car. We lost everything. But thank God, the children survived.

I still have trousers, shoes, and a shirt. I’ll survive. I’ll survive because I had a dream. A dream that the God will bring the “Russian orcs” to my beloved Kiev, to my Bucha, and to my village. And I will be able to sign up with the Russian Army to liberate my Batkivshchyna, my homeland from the fierce satanism that tormented our house in Bucha for three days, and tortured my beloved village for ten days. Please, “Russian Orcs”, dear Christ, come back!

Jason asked us to critique this post by this guy Daniel who is having all sorts of problems with women. Basically he can’t get laid with God’s help. I’m only responding to part of it here. I will respond to more later on.

 Why Hasn’t Game Worked?

Hello everyone. I’m in a unique situation. My purpose in writing this thread is to identify the problem so I can solve it. It’s not to whine or complain. It might seem that way, and if it does, then forgive me, I’m really sincerely trying to solve the issues here.

My situation is that I’ve been practicing Game (not just learning or ‘studying’, but actively going out and doing) for the past ten years. I first found the red pill in the form of David D at the age of 17, and I’m 28 now. For that entire time, I’ve been doing everything I’m supposed to do: I’ve done astronomical amounts of approaches on a consistent basis in all sorts of settings both daytime and nighttime.

I’ve read up on different schools of Game, tried many out, kept a journal of my interactions, reviewed what I did right and what I could improve on, and generally conquered every woman-related fear that I could identify.

My philosophy on Game and life in general could pretty much be summed up as follows: “If you’re afraid of it, all the more reason to go and do it.” I feel that whatever’s blocking me from getting laid inevitably has to do with fear – and so if I keep noticing fears and promptly taking the courage to overcome them, then eventually all of that fear-conquering will lead to improvement in my life.

And as a result, I have almost no approach anxiety. I overcame approach anxiety years ago. I can approach just about any girl in just about any place.

It’s no longer an issue for me. I even used to have friends and wingmen point out the most difficult sets, and I’d approach them just to prove to myself that I wasn’t afraid and to prove that hesitation and fear weren’t the reasons for why I wasn’t getting female affection.

But despite all of the work I’ve put in, I have nothing to show. I’m a virgin with the exception of times I hired prostitutes, which comes out to a grand total of five times. I haven’t had sex with any girl who wasn’t ‘working’.

I am not a troll. I am a man who has put in the time and work and courage to improve my life. It just hasn’t worked. And I’m trying to figure out why.

When I heard about Elliot Rodger, something in me changed. Things are serious now. I can see myself turning into him eventually if this problem isn’t solved. I’ve read the first 90 pages of the manifesto, and it’s like reading my own autobiography.

The way he describes the utter hopelessness he feels and the jealousy was like hearing my own story told back to me. The only difference between me and him is that I always believed in the possibility of success, and I went out and took the active steps necessary to achieve it. I put in the work, and I took the risks.

I’m currently applying for English teaching jobs overseas, so I can get a girlfriend based on the Murr’kin factor, i.e. socioeconomic status. But I’m concerned that this might not work as well as I expect it to.

I’m concerned that whatever the “issue” is with my Game is going to follow me wherever I go. In another country I’m sure I’ll get dates. I may get hookups. I might even get sex. But it’ll be based on money, status, and nationality – and how long will it be before the girl starts to play me, use me, dig for gold, etc? How long before my lack of skill with women catches up to me?

I want to figure out what the #$

So I’ve written a story about my life from the beginning up until the present with a focus on girls and Game. I’m sure there’s a pattern in there which one of you experts can pick out and be like “I found your problem!” At least I’m hoping for that.

My story is both inspiring and heartbreaking, hopeful and hopeless, and enraging and comical all at the same time. It will elicit mad props in one sentence, pity in the next, and raucous laughter not far behind. I think you will enjoy it.

So without further ado, here it is. Tell me what you think.

His quotes are in call-outs or quote marks. Mine are in normal type. His intro is in italic. Note: People have been telling me I am quite goodlooking for most of my life, so I will refer to myself that way below. Don’t take it as bragging.

As a kid, I mostly played videogames and romped around the house with friends – I didn’t care much for sports. People described me as strong-willed, highly intelligent, and cute.

This part makes no sense. As a boy he was cute. What about as a teenager? As an adult? Cute boys usually become cute teens and adults. But below he says he’s 5’2. That may be the whole problem right there. A lot of short men are just screwed, especially nowadays.

All of my friends were male, and I never had any female friends (something that persists up until the present day). But in elementary school, I didn’t care. Girls were like a foreign species; they weren’t interested in the things I liked, and I didn’t see any reason to want to hang out with them.

This is normal anyway. Elementary school boys don’t like girls. Though when I was 10, I liked this Chinese girl. I went over and sat with her one lunch and ate lunch with the girls as boys and girls ate in separate places. Boys saw me and called me a fag for sitting with the girls, so I quit doing it LOL.

When I got to middle school, that started to change, as I started to feel attraction and desire for girls. It was in 6th grade that I experienced my first crush: a petite, slightly mousy little blonde with freckles.

I was extremely afraid of the social repercussions for ‘liking’ a girl who didn’t like me back, so I was careful to never show that I ‘liked’ her. Whenever I saw her in class or the hallways, I would look at her as much as I could but would always look away if she looked in my direction.

Looks like he’s pretty shy. This last sentence is not good. You can’t act shy around females. They will never know you like them, and it will turn them off.

Eventually I asked one of my gossipy, “in-crowd” friends to find out if she liked me by asking her friends. He did as I asked and inquired with her friends, and he reported back “No”, she said she didn’t like me.

And the result was quite dramatic – the girl came into class the next day red-faced and embarrassed, and everyone was looking at me with a strange look – a combination of laughter, derision, shock, and, “Oh boy, look what you did, you’re in big trouble.” I felt totally ashamed and couldn’t even look at her anymore.

This is a pretty serious blow. I never had anything like that happen to me, thank God!

I dreaded the classes that I had with her. Despite this, a few weeks later at the ice skating rink (the popular gathering place for kids after school), I approached her on the ice and tried to start a conversation. She just stared off into space and shook her head, not even making eye contact with me.

Good, he approached her.

In 7th grade, I developed a crush on another girl. This time I learned from my mistakes and decided to ask the girl out directly without going through a third party. This girl was a little bit more outgoing then the previous one, and I had already had several conversations with her in various contexts.

So one day after the bell as everyone was going home, I approached her at her locker and asked her out on a date. She said no. But she was tactful about it at least.

At least he tried.

But in 8th grade I had my first ejaculation, and I started to be attracted to girls sexually. I remember sitting in my seat, and whenever girls would walk by me up close, I would almost cream in my pants just from their presence a couple feet away. I remember running home as fast as I could to masturbate.

That’s normal. 13 year old boys – or teenage boys period for that matter – masturbate a Hell of a lot.

In 9th grade, I started to become aware that other guys had girlfriends and I didn’t, but this didn’t really bother me all that much. I would have preferred to have a girlfriend, and I made some attempts here and there, but it wasn’t the main thing on my mind.

That’s a bit young for everyone to get girlfriends. I remember as a sophomore hardly any of the guys I knew had a girlfriend. I was actually one of the first of my group.

I did ask a girl to the Homecoming Dance though. She was a friend of my one of my friends, and I sat down to eat lunch with her and asked her to the dance. She declined.

I’m not sure he should have been asking out girls until he’s figured out if they liked him or not. I didn’t have a lot of girls turning me down in high school because I wouldn’t make a move on them unless they gave me some signals.

As the sun came up, I went out for a walk around my neighborhood in an emotional state which, looking back now, could probably be described as my first mystical experience. Everything in the world felt new, golden, full of life. I felt love in every leaf on every tree, every cloud, every rock. It was like the whole world was made of love.

I knew that what I was feeling was the taste of a love relationship, and that I could experience it with a real girl in real life.

Ok, he’s falling in love or wants to fall in love. Excellent.

The afterglow of this experience lasted for many days. But eventually I started to wish I had a girlfriend to experience this kind of love with someone in real life. I began to fantasize about hanging out with a girl at my house, sitting and talking, going for walks together, watching sunsets together, talking for long hours into the night, bringing her to my favorite activities.

Good.

I even started to feel a sense of emptiness when I did the things I enjoyed. They just weren’t the same anymore. I felt like I was missing something. And the more I enjoyed a particular activity, the more empty I felt while doing it. I started doing my hobbies less and less because it was getting quite painful to have a “good time” all by myself without anyone to share the experiences with. I started to dread having fun. All I could think about whenever I had fun was “This would be sooooooo much better if I was doing it with a girl.”

This is actually pretty normal, but I’m also worried it’s a trap. Hell, I feel like this a lot these days myself, but then I’m also strangely satisfied because I had a ton of fun.

I needed a girlfriend. Nothing I did was enjoyable anymore without a female companion. I left the house in the middle of the game. I took a walk, attempting to process the incredibly overwhelming emotions I was feeling.

He shouldn’t have gotten so upset that he could not get a girl at that age. I wasn’t. He’s setting himself up to be miserable. Don’t expect anything good to happen. Then if something does, you will be amazed and happy. If nothing does, well, I told you so.

After the movie was over, I did eventually find one pair of girls who had seen the same movie, and I went over and talked to them. I don’t remember what was said, but all I remember is that I left empty handed. When I got home, I cried. I was so angry I threw a garbage can clear across the back yard.

You can’t get so upset with one little turn-down. Hell, my life these days is practically one endless turn-down or shut down from dawn to dusk, and it doesn’t make me that unhappy. I figure it’s normal at this age.

When school finally started, I felt like a kid in a candy shop. At least for the first few days. I soon realized however that none of the girls were interested in me. I was perplexed. I didn’t know what to do. I tried everything I knew of, and nothing led anywhere.

I think when I was 15, no girls were interested in me, or maybe one was. I sat with her on the steps outside of the building after school and talked to her for what seemed like hours. She was really nice. I remember this male teacher walked by and saw me talking to a girl and was stunned and shocked and gave me some respect.

At one point, I simply leaned in and kissed her, just like that. She liked it but I didn’t press the matter. Never ask permission for anything like this. Just lean in and do it. She’ll go for it if you read the vibes right, and if you don’t, she will just gently turn her cheek or put her hand up to her face or turn you down in some way, especially if you go in real slow. You go in slow to give her an opportunity to physically stop you if she doesn’t want to do it. But in my life, they usually just go for it for some reason.

Or, Hell, they ask me. I had a date a while ago. She was fat and ugly, and I have no idea why I made the date. As soon as she was in the door, I was at her body, smiling and feeling her tits real gently. Her hand instinctively went for my cock and grabbed it. I guess with older women it becomes an instinct! That’s good too. She’s been in your house less than a minute and she’s already grabbing your cock! This is what you want.

Then she gently pushed me away and said, “Hey, not so fast now. Let’s take this a little slower.” I shrugged like I could care less.

She walked over to the table and then turned around suddenly, looked at me, and said, “Kiss me.” So I did it. This is pretty good. You want women doing things like this. You want them asking you to kiss them. It’s perfect. A lot of guys hardly ever experience that.

After a while, she said she wasn’t feeling it and left. I was turned off by her because she was so fat and ugly, so I was actually happy because I dreaded having sex with her. Honestly, if you are not fat or ugly yourself, don’t date fat or ugly women. You will make some comment about fat or ugly people or about being goodlooking at some point, and she will take offense and she will take offense and say she doesn’t care about looks. This is typical because by a fairly early age most fat or ugly women get ok with being fat or ugly. They simply accept it and start feeling good about themselves for being that way.

Relationships between goodlooking people and uglies and between normal weight people and fatties don’t work! If you are goodlooking or normal weight and can’t get a decent looking woman or one who’s not a fattie, just don’t date.

Then she contacted me a couple of weeks later and wanted to go on a “road trip” with me for a few days, staying in motels! I blocked her. But that’s good too. You want them contacting you and asking you out on vacations for Chrissake when you barely even know each other.

As you can see, even now, my life doesn’t completely suck, and it’s far better than those poor incels.

I started to sink into a depression. I stopped doing homework. I stopped doing my hobbies. I couldn’t bear to have fun anymore because the more fun I had, the more aware I became of the lack of companionship while doing it. My favorite activities were like torture. I slowly dropped most of them and dedicated my entire mind, life, and energy to finding a girlfriend.

He’s set himself a trap.

These girls lived in a town an hour away.

When we got to their house, they had several other female friends over. My friend hooked up with the girl he had met at the club.

For my part, I was outgoing, social, and funny. My friend was shy, silent, and rather boring – but by the end of the night, my friend had a hookup, and I didn’t. I didn’t understand why. It was a pattern that would repeat itself many, many times from that day forward.

I’m not getting it.

We visited that group several more times, and the girl my friend had hooked up with became his girlfriend. I felt it was smart for me to keep going there because she had lots of female friends.

I continued to be funny and outgoing, but for some reason the group started to make fun of me and even bully me a little – probably because I was the only single dude there, the only dude without a mate. Single dudes receive more disrespect and derision than any other demographic in this society. I came to learn that quickly.

This is absolutely correct, but you need to get rid of it by becoming completely insensitive. No one bothers me about these things because I look like the sort of person you don’t want to mess with. I also don’t look like I get my feelings hurt easily. Instead I look like I might get pissed – real pissed. Also I act like I don’t care, and when you act like that, a lot of people quit bothering you. If you look like someone who gets their feelings hurt easily, a lot of people will do just that.

As far as this situation, I don’t really tolerate this crap at all, though of course I’ve been in this situation before. You just need to take off when things get like this. You lost their respect and I don’t think it’s coming back.

I didn’t care about girls at all my freshman year of high school. In my sophomore year, I was still hanging around with these moron geeks and nerds from the Chess Club. I couldn’t play chess worth a damn, but I hung around these guys anyway. By the way, you don’t have to be involved in something to hang out with people who do. They will accept you even if you don’t do what they do if you are social enough.

Anyway, none of these guys seemed like they could get a girl with God’s help, and they were all these really geeked out intellectual brain dudes. Most of them had quite high IQ’s. For some reason, my idiot father was proud of me for hanging out with these dorks because he was kind of a brainy prig himself, and he thought it was cool to be geeked out.

These guys also tended to be effeminate. Some of them were pretty much flamers. I have no idea if they were really gay or straight or what at that point or if they even had a sexual orientation. I know I did – straight – and I wanted to keep it that way. I also don’t know if they grew up to be straight or gay men. Not all effeminate teenage boys become gay men. For some, the faggoty behavior is just a phase.

There were these two twins from elementary school called the Hunts. They were already acting like flaming faggots in 5th grade, limp wrists and the whole nine yards. Of course they were mercilessly teased for being fags, but if you think about it, is it absolutely necessary that pre-gay boys act like effeminate flaming homos? Do they have some flamer gene that forces them to act this way? Can’t they control their behavior? I’m sort of dubious.

Anyway, any kid who acts like a flaming faggot while he’s still in elementary school deserves to be teased. He’s setting a terrible role model for the normal boys, and by opposing this flamer, the normal boys learn to see themselves as the opposite of the flamers – masculine boys who disdain homosexuality and like girls. I don’t think it’s good to “accept” these boys, as I’m worried this effeminate behavior could be contagious. Straight male culture has strong prohibitions against acting faggy, even if you are completely straight. It’s a ridiculous way to behave.

Maybe they have to set up special schools for them. Some districts have set up special schools for the faggy guys, dykey girls, and nonbinary whatevers. For the older ones, the schools are for actual gay boys, lesbian girls, and nonbinary or tranny mostly crazies. This seems like the best solution. It’s a nice dream world where straight masculine boys accept faggy pre-gay boys, but I don’t think it will ever happen in my lifetime. Most gay men were probably teased and bullied as boys and most of them seem to have come out of it ok, not that it’s a good thing.

Anyway, we bullied them mercilessly. They were named the Hunts so of course we were forced to call the the Cunts, right? I was still hanging out with one of the twins in 10th grade, D. Hunt (chess club member and friend), and he was as big a flamer as ever. And most of those boys in that Chess Club acted like flaming faggots.

I never thought much of it at the time because I didn’t associate effeminate behavior with homosexuality, and I barely knew or understood what homosexuality was anyway. The only porn I had was some novels including Manchild in the Promised Land and The Godfather by Mario Puzo. You don’t think of those as porn novels but they did have sex scenes that my imagination turned into hot fantasies.

I decided if I was going to keep hanging around with these guys, I was going to turn into a flaming faggot myself, and this was something I didn’t want to happen. Back then we thought homosexuality was contagious and could develop in any male at any time, so it was something you had to guard against. I saw my father as trying to turn me into an effeminate homosexual, and that really pissed me off. Of course that was not his intention, but that was going to be the outcome of his ignorance.

I decided to rebel. The first thing that had to go was my “geek hair,” which in those days meant short hair. Girls hated short-haired boys back then, and if you wanted to get any chicks, you had to grow your hair long. Every few weekends, my idiot father would haul us all off to the barbershop to get our hair buzzed off in very short haircuts. This was called “The Haircut Express.” He would run around saying, “Haircut express! Haircut express! Let’s everybody go!”

One weekend I stood up and said, “No!”

Then the wars started, the Haircut Wars. I wasn’t going to keep my hair short and make it so I couldn’t get chicks. That along with other things might turn me gay. By refusing to cut my hair I was taking a stand and saying I didn’t want to be a flaming faggot and instead I wanted to be a straight, masculine boy. So you see I was putting my foot down and standing up for manhood, masculinity, and heterosexuality.

I tried to explain to my father that girls hated short-haired guys and if you wanted to get girls, you had to grow your hair long. This was insane and irrational to him as short hair meant manhood and long hair was faggy, effeminate, womanish, and especially gay as Hell. I might as well have told him that the moon came out in the daytime. That’s how crazy he thought my idea was. It was incomprehensible to him.

These turned into massive, wild wars with screaming, yelling, fighting, swearing, throwing objects and all manner of hellaciousness. Come to think of it it was rather fun though because part of me likes a good brawl. Pretty soon my younger brothers started following in my footsteps. I was now “the ringleader of the rebels,” in my father’s words.

About this time I started listening to rock music too. And boy did my father hate that. This was another part of my rebellion and another effort to get girls and keep from getting turned gay. Grow your hair long and listen to rock music and you can get girls. Be a short-haired dork who hates rock and sit in the Chess Club room with a bunch of flaming incels and that just seemed to be the road to faggotry.

He hated everything about the Counterculture, the hair, the music, the drugs. He used to talk about “Ayyyybeeee Hoffman” with contempt though he was a philosemite. His whole generation despised the Counterculture. The WW2 generation and we Boomer Counterculture kids were at all out war back in those days. It wasn’t even very fun. It was kind of a drag with a lot of hate and yelling and bad vibes everywhere. It was actually a nightmare and it went on forever and part of my is happy that the World War 2 Generation is taking off. They caused us so much unnecessary pain.

Age 16 rolled around, then 16 1/2, and I befriended a guy named Neils F. who lived on my block. He was the local bad boy sociopath delinquent surfer doper badass longhair dude. Since girls love delinquents, criminals, sociopaths, and aggressive assholes, he was also banging some of the the local high school girls who lived around us to boot while no one else was. He was basically sort of a criminal or about as much of a criminal you could be without actually being a criminal. You could say he was running Bad Boy Game, Surfer Game, Stoner Game, Delinquent Game, etc. He got me to try marijuana. And I started smoking it.

Whenever I saw a girl who I was interested in, I found some way to talk to her. It may have been weird, Beta-ey, white-knighty, stalkery, and ineffective, but I was trying.

Probably a bad idea to go after the ones you are interested in if you see no sign they are interested in you. More likely sit back and see which ones are interested in you, then make your move. But it looks like no girls are ever interested in this guy, so I don’t know what to do.

I even asked a girl to the prom. It was very scary – prom was a big, big deal. I was so nervous when I asked her to go with me.

But she declined. She had a look on her face that was like “Um, why are you asking me?” It was like there were two categories of guys, in her mind: Yeses and No’s. And I didn’t fit either category – I was “N/A.” Not only did she not want to be with me in a romantic context, but the very thought of me in that context was alien to her – it didn’t even make any sense.

He shouldn’t have asked her. Her response made sense. Why the Hell was he asking her anyway? If she shows no interest in you, I don’t think anything good is ever going to come of it. But these guys claim no woman is ever interested in them. I don’t have a solution for this.

This latter position was extremely prestigious, since I lived in a very left-wing liberal area, and almost every family was die-hard Democratic. I arranged for sitting elected officials to visit the school and organized events in which I wore suits and gave speeches from podiums and was in a pretty “Alpha” position.

There were girls in the club, and girls from outside the club came to the events to see the politicians. But this prestige didn’t do anything towards attracting them romantically. For some reason I was still invisible to them.

I’m not getting it. His problem is no one is interested in him. I don’t have a remedy for that, nor do I have a clue why that is.

When 12th grade was about to start, I contemplated my situation. I thought about why I had been without a girlfriend for an entire year. I couldn’t understand why everyone else seemed to be forming connections with girls and I wasn’t. Everyone except for my group of friends – we were the girl-less outcasts.

That’s still ok by that age, although really you need to get something going on by high school. If you miss out by high school, you are behind the game already.

There were many subcultures at my school: the JAP’s (the popular kids), the skaters, the goths, the black kids (I’m not a racist, but I couldn’t hang with the black kids because whenever I did, they would practice WWE wrestling moves on me), the goody-goody teachers pets, the nerds, and the Russian immigrants who looked like hitmen at the age of 16.

I didn’t belong in any of those groups – I was “miscellaneous.” Everyone who didn’t have a group was part of my group. I didn’t have much in common with any of my friends other than the fact that none of us had anything in common with anyone else.

I got into that situation where I didn’t fit in with anyone, so I become a stoner. That was the only way I could be a cool guy and join some sort of a group and come to think of it, it was a good idea. I also had surfer friends, friends on the track team, and some  motocross friends. I didn’t surf, run track, or ride motocross, but I hung out with those groups anyway. You really need to find a group and hang out with it whether you do those things or not.

And my friends were just as clueless with girls as I was. I didn’t have any positive role models in this area. But there was one key difference between me and them: I tried to get girls, whereas they didn’t really care. They were all of the mindset of, “Girls don’t like us – oh well, let’s play computer games.” But I couldn’t settle for that. I was a fighter.

By junior year, I was having my first sexual experiences. This was a great time to start. I had sex before many or most of my friends did.

Being clueless with girls is not good. You are already behind the game.