What It’s Like to Be a Man: Experiences of Transmen or FTM Transsexuals

Talk to a transman, especially one who has gone back. This is the story they will tell you:

When you are a man, it is unbearably lonely. No one cares about you. You can drop dead tomorrow and no one will bat an eye. No one will come up to you and start talking to you. No one will ask you out on a date. You are all alone in a world that cares nothing about you. It’s the most terrifying feeling of loneliness and vulnerability.

I’m not here to bitch. I am a man. I know full well that this is just how it goes. I don’t like it, but I made my peace with it long ago. Don’t fight the things you can’t change that will never go away anyway.

But yep, this is exactly how it is to be a man.

If women had to live the sort of lives we men do, they would not be able to handle it. They’d tolerate it for a while, but then they’d blow their brains out.

Do we get any sympathy for this from women? Why? Because women, like society in general, could care less about us men. This the precise and open statement at the bottom of feminism, which developed as a hate movement against men. Feminism is nothing but female psychology unleashed, decriminalized, and reified. Women are gods, men are devils, and that’s it.

If women were really the compassionate creatures they claim to be, they would not feel this way, nor would they join this vicious hate movement against their brothers.

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3 thoughts on “What It’s Like to Be a Man: Experiences of Transmen or FTM Transsexuals”

  1. “When you are a man, it is unbearably lonely. No one cares about you. You can drop dead tomorrow and no one will bat an eye…You are all alone in a world that cares nothing about you. It’s the most terrifying feeling of loneliness and vulnerability.”

    Although this is pretty grim, I think I get the gist of what he’s saying. I’m guessing that there are cultural differences in the way men perceive what it means to be a man. Men bond with each other to overcome these vulnerabilities, yes?

    1. With what who is saying? The transman?

      I’m not sure what it means to be a man differs a whole lot from culture to culture. Sure, they may be some differences.

      Men bond with each other to overcome these vulnerabilities, yes?

      We should but we don’t. For straight men, part of the problem is homophobia. A lot of friendships between straight men in adulthood have issues around homophobia. Also if you are an adult man and you are out with your buddy on the weekend or even on a weeknight, people think he’s your gay lover.

      Once I had a friend over at my place and another guy came over at 1 AM to deliver a pound of pot. The friend delivered it but he looked at us really weird when he left, I guess because I had a male friend over that late at night. When you are a teenage boy or into very early adulthood, it’s not that bad, but as soon as you start moving into your 20’s, you start getting this attitude. This was also 40 years ago. Not sure if anything is different now.

      Maybe it was just me and other guys don’t get this, but I definitely got this as an adult man out with a male friend on a weeknight or weekend, especially on a weekend. I’m not sure if all guys get this. Commenters are urged to weigh in. Any of you hung out with a male friend on a weeknight or weekend as an adult man? Did you ever get accused of being gay and have people say he was your gay lover?

      1. OK. You’re saying that men should bond with each other but don’t. This may not be a universal experience, though. Throughout history men have always understood that there’s strength in numbers. Yes, a man alone is vulnerable, but a band of men with a common purpose can be a source of power.

        In such a group, a man is no longer unbearably lonely. He is no longer as vulnerable as he might be if he were on his own. Men have joined each other to hunt. They’ve joined gangs, fraternities, labor unions, business ventures, etc. I don’t know how far humankind would have made it without the power of male bonding!

        That’s my take on it, anyway. 🙂

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