Well, the heartbreak of the last month or so has a massive positive side. Well, the thing is the “beloved” has allowed me to “stay on”. However, the catch is that she’s treating me like the scum of the Earth. So why stick around? Well, I love the woman!
Anyway, I wouldn’t do it otherwise. Isn’t this just like in the Marines where the so desperately want to get out with honors? They want that goal – but the instructors do everything they can to stop it – so only the people who just won’t quit get the prize. In other words, like on the movie Whiplash, “The real Charlie Parker wouldn’t give up.”
Anyway, why do people need to be smashed and recreated? Well, they’re just too self-centered, too evil. Anyhow, don’t think I’m not doing this without prayer – cause this is like The Exorcist.