Jason: No offense, but often women into “higher values” are snobs. Also, of course, not all minority women are sluts and whores. Give me a break!
Now what’s better? A clean snob or a dirty person with a good heart?
Also, finally, how did they become sluts and whores? More than not, it was victimization by the dad or others.
Jason: Also, of course, not all minority women are sluts and whores. Give me a break!
Oh of course. It was not so much about being a sexual slut, although none of my Mom’s friends were like that. Nevertheless, one of her sisters was and my Mom acted like she didn’t care. I imagine you could be wild in bed with your husband, but you weren’t supposed to be promiscuous. Anyway this “woman of the street” thing was more about behavior than sex.
Jason: No offense, but often women into “higher values” are snobs.
I am not aware that my Mom’s friends were like that. At least I don’t remember any of them being like that. Some were really into money and status like graduating from a top school, but they never married rich men, so it was a bit of a pathetic joke.
One of my Mom’s friends thought a woman should marry only a Harvard or Yale man who made at least six figures. None of the men she married were rich. None graduated from Harvard. Then she started demanding that her daughter marry such a man. Her daughter was a homely nerd. Now a fat homely nerd. She could never get such a man either. So her snobbishness was just stupid.
Jason: Now what’s better? A clean snob or a dirty person with a good heart?
Most of my Mom’s friends were “clean” because was just how a proper woman was supposed to be. And back then, most women of her class and race were like that. My Mom didn’t associate with dirty or promiscuous women. She didn’t necessarily hate them.
She doesn’t like prostitutes though. I will tell you that. She considers that the lowest a woman can go. I suppose they could leave the business and reform, but one of my Mom’s sayings was:
Jason: You can take the girl out of the whorehouse but you can’t take the whorehouse out of the girl.
She’s sort of right of right.
Also my Mom’s group were both clean and goodhearted for the most part. Women were not supposed to be evil-minded or vicious. That was the world of men. Women did not inhabit that vicious world.
Jason: Also, finally, how did they become sluts and whores? More than not, it was victimization by the dad or others.
Like I said she didn’t really care about sluts. She’s been told about some of my girlfriends, and she basically doesn’t give a fuck. It’s more that her and her friends did not act that way, and they did not associate with women who did.
My Mom doesn’t like whores, but I don’t think she gives a damn about sluts. She just doesn’t like the idea of selling your pussy to men. That is considered to be extremely low, dirty, improper behavior.My Mom knows that a lot of women, especially younger women, are horny as Hell. She has acknowledged that.
My Mom associated Black and Brown women along with poor and working class White women with “women of the street”. That meant not so much that they were sluts but more that they fought with their men, screamed at them, insulted them and put them down, attacked their masculinity, and even got into physical fights with them.
To my Mom’s women, a proper White woman of her class simply did not treat her husband that way. You had to respect your husband, and in return he was more or less decent to you. That was the trade-off.
Also basically the women in my Mom’s generation were not Forever Children, golddiggers, Borderlines or drama queens. The typical female scenario of chaos and drama was not there. I’m sure my Mom’s crowd would have loved to have been that way because that’s female nature, but back then, a proper White woman of a certain class was supposed to be mature and to control herself.
That meant sublimating, suppressing, or repressing a lot of typical female emo behavior. My Mom’s class were “controlled women.” You were supposed to control yourself. An out of control woman was very much looked down on by my Mom’s crowd. She calls them crazy women and she really hates them. They can’t control themselves.
My Mom’s crowd of women were supposed to be proper, decent, civilized, sane, and controlled. The opposite of all of those things was “woman of the street” – a woman with no class or especially self-control. Women like that were literally disgusting to my Mom’s crowd of women. Almost viscerally so.
8 thoughts on “Alt Left: The Values of My Mother’s Greatest Generation of Middle to Upper Class White Women”
Well, one can communicate higher values without being a “snotty bitch” LOL. However, I’ve seen too many cases where that’s not happening.
Well what about your White culture in working class Tennessee, Jason? How is a proper White woman supposed to act from your mother’s generation? Is she supposed to act like my Mom’s crew, or is she allowed to go off on her husband, and that’s just fine?
Didn’t Southerners subscribed to that belief, Jason? What Robert wrote regarding his affluent mother was the blueprint of Southern womanhood.
Thanks for the comment, Reyna. You new here?
Welcome to the site, Reyna. Are you new here?
Welcome to the site! I enjoyed your comment about how my Mom and her friends were like the stereotype of a proper middle to upper class Southern White married woman. I think you hit it on the head perfectly.
According to Wikipedia:
The Southern belle is a proper young woman of the American South’s upper socioeconomic class.
The image of a Southern belle is often characterized by fashion elements such as a hoop skirt, a corset, pantalettes, a wide-brimmed straw hat, and gloves. As signs of tanning were considered working-class and unfashionable during this era, parasols and fans are also often represented.
Southern belles were expected to marry respectable young men and become ladies of society dedicated to the family and community. The Southern belle archetype is characterized by Southern hospitality, a cultivation of beauty, and a flirtatious yet chaste demeanor.
This sums up the ideal Southern belle.