Alt Left: Face It, Men: Your Girlfriend or Wife Is Your Surrogate Mother

Sometimes if you want to role-play with your girlfriend, you can go into “little boy” mode where you’re the little boy, and your gf is your Mom. You talk like a little boy and to some extent act like one but not too much. It’s not serious or real. It’s just a big joke.

I’ve done that with a few childless girlfriends aged 29 to 49, and they all loved it. I was their son! You would think they would make fun of and ridicule me, but they really got into it. Some women hate it though, think it’s stupid, and won’t play the game.

Anyway, your girlfriend really is your mother. Face it, your girlfriend or your wife replaces your Mom. We men go from Mom to girlfriend or wife, and really nothing changes.

A few men are ridiculous about it. I could give you examples, but the wife actually didn’t mind and still loved the guy to death, though frankly he was a huge pussy.

Men are too macho to admit that their girlfriends or wives become not only our lovers, yes, but also our Moms. When men become elderly, this idea of the wife turning into the Mom becomes much more obvious, often glaringly so. Some men don’t even try to hide it much.

We men are not good at taking care of ourselves. A lot of divorced men can’t even fend for their own. They fall apart quickly when they live alone, and quite a few get sick or die fairly quickly. These guys are like little boys without a Mom living on their own. How long would a boy last in the woods without Mom? These men literally need a wife or girlfriend to stay alive. We men like to think we are self-reliant, but we need to think about that.

Actually bachelors fend a lot better on their own than divorced men. And the longer they have been bachelors, the better they get at it. Most of the long-term bachelors I know are fairly decent cooks. Most can do their own laundry. Most are good about going to the doctor, and they are almost female about it.

And I know bachelors who keep in contact with their mothers regularly, so even though they don’t have the surrogate mother in terms of wife or girlfriend, they still keep the real thing around on some level anyway.

Some even talk to Mom almost every day. They usually live away from her, but they’re on the phone to her a lot, or she’s on the phone to them. The mother doesn’t usually run the guy’s life if he’s a real man – he’ll tell her to piss off if she does, and most mothers will back off because instinctively they know that being party to a Momma’s boy is not cool.

So most bachelors more or less do whatever they want, especially sexually with regard to women, and their mothers have no say in the matter. My Mom’s been my playboy cheerleader most of her life. She’s like:

Go get em, stud! I’m so proud of my playboy son ha ha.

She even used to fix me up with her friends.

Mom: Hey Bob, you know my friend XXXXX?

Me: Yeah?

Mom: She wants to go out with you.

Now she’s turning into a prude in her old age (80’s), and I have been told she does not want to hear about my exploits anymore. In particular, she doesn’t want to hear about me being with teenage girls and young women. That pisses her off.

But these bachelors are still in a way being mothered by their Moms. Some still bring their clothing over to do laundry if they live close. Others have Moms that give them food or help them out with money if they need it. More typically, they have their Moms call them and remind them of stuff they need to do, like doctor’s appointments or important affairs that they tend to blow off.

I actually do all of these things, and I am not embarrassed to say so. Why should I be? She doesn’t tell me what to do. I live my own life. She’s not my Mommy anymore in that sense.

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