Surgical Procedure Today

Hi folks, just had a surgical procedure in the hospital. Colonoscopy to be exact. Been ages since I had one and at 62, you need these things. Also I have been having rectal bleeding these days. The surgeon asked me how long I have had this bleeding, and I told him 20 years. He was a bit stunned but then he said we’ll look into it.

I never thought it was much of anything as I always just assumed it was hemorrhoids. Well, turns out I was right after all. I’ve got hemorrhoids! Piles! Or whatever you want to call those little buggers. I assume they are internal, not external. Any advice on how to get rid of these pesky critters accepted with gratitude.

I also have diverticulosis. You can look it up. Well, by age 50, 8

But they eat a very high-fiber diet, and we eat a low-fiber, high-fat diet which leads to diverticulosis, polyps, colon cancer and other cool diseases. Also their shit isn’t hard. Ever noticed those hard shits you have? Well, that ain’t normal. Africans don’t have those. Their shits look more like tapioca pudding, albeit brown tapioca pudding to be precise.

The shit is supposed to move through your intestines pretty quickly. Meat and high fat diets slow down the intestinal freeway so you end up with an intestinal traffic jam. Result is constipation, polyps, colon cancer and other groovy stuff. Eat a lot of fiber and the shit just cruises on through 55 mph with no slowdowns.

Anyway diverticulosis is nothing, everyone has it by the time you get to middle age, and it usually has no symptoms. However, diverticula can get infected, that is, something, say a watermelon seed, gets stuck in one of those darned pouches and can’t escape or even call for help. It’s just SOL and this can result in an infection, which is called diverticulitis. This is what my 84 year old aunt has now. It’s quite painful. Not sure how it’s treated. Maybe they cut it out.

Anyway spent a fun morning in the hospital today from 5:30 AM – 10:30 AM. They gave me a shot of something and I was awake and chirping like a bird and the next thing I knew, two seconds later, it was an hour later and I was waking up for a very weird short-long sleep thing. Actually I was unconscious.

Knocked out by Fentanyl. Yes, that Fentanyl, that’s killing thousands of Americans every year. And they shot it right into my vein like any self-respecting IV drug user does. Except I’ve never done needles, drug fan that I am.

Don’t know about this Fentanyl high. Doesn’t feel like much of anything really except I am pretty calm, happy, and friendly, but that’s generally the idea with mild doses of opiates. Also a lot of my chronic pains went away. Thank you, heroin! I mean Fentanyl. Oh well, it’s all the same, trust me.

They said don’t drink for 24 hours, but you really think that is going to stop a determined drinker like me? You kidding?

Die with your boots on! That’s my attitude, baby. And live dangerously!

A little research showed me that there’s no interaction with booze and Fentanyl, so here I am, drinking Tequila like a proper roue, or aging degenerate, pick your adjective. I don’t know about this Fentanyl stuff.

Good high if you want to go to sleep so fast you don’t even  realize it when you knock out I guess. But I go to sleep most every night anyway. Why take a drug that makes you go to sleep? What’s the point? It’s like taking a drug that makes you breathe, eat, or piss. With some things in life, we don’t have much choice you know. It’s pretty much do or die.

Oh well, over and out. Sitting here wasted on Tequila and Fentanyl and not feeling much pain in either my mind or my body.

Do  you want me to write about the Iran-US war situation? I can do it if you want. I have a lot of information, along with a journalist source who is close to the top levels of the Iranian and  Iraqi governments, Hezbollah, and the Houthis. And  what he told me is pretty much the exact opposite of the crap lies that the US government and  (((media))) is feeding y’all these days.

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7 thoughts on “Surgical Procedure Today”

  1. hemorrhoids! Piles!

    It’s mostly a White people disease. Oh yes, I get it too, all the rectal bleeding stuff. Nothing to be panicked about. Perverted gays enjoy that bleeding! So we’ll be fine.

    Usual culprits are extremely spicy food and certain nitrites used in products like corned beef, pastrami, etc.. Have to cut down on the jalapenos or whatever you enjoy so much. Go with more fresh fruit and vegetables. Lean cuts of meat.

    I usually get rectal bleeding if I have Nashville-style Fried chicken. That happened to me so many times in Indonesia where that type of fried chicken is very common.

    I usually consume an Ayurvedic medicine called Pilex after any instance of rectal bleeding. It’s really effective. I think you can find it in the US on Amazon or at an Indian store.

    There’s also a “lube” which can bring immediate relief.

    https://himalayawellness.in/products/pilex

  2. I wonder how normal/healthy dry crap is for cats, my current cat has this. There are also cats with loose wet stinkies. African staple Fufu looks a bit like tapioca as well.

    1. Most cat shit is pretty hard for whatever reason. Doesn’t seem to get in the way of a long way. The loose wet stinkies seem to occur mostly when they are ill or stressed out.

      African staple Fufu looks a bit like tapioca as well.

      What’s African staple Fufu?

      1. My parents had a cat with wet stinky crap that could only eat canned or he’d get the squirts. Given that wet canned food is more natural and healthy. I was thinking dry crap is for domesticated cats and humans, the wild ones shitting ponds of pudding in the jungle.

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