Plastic Bertrand, “Ca Plane Pour Moi”

Roger François Jouret or Plastic Bertrand, Ca Plane Pour Moi. 1978. The song had actually been originally sung by the man who wrote it, Lou Deprijck, who recorded it with sound engineer Phil Delire for RKM/Vogue at Studio Morgan in Brussels. The song was a worldwide smash it, but Plastic Bertrand only got .5% of the royalties. Rock artists get screwed like this all the time.

Probably it doesn’t matter that the lyrics are in French.

French lyrics here:

Wam! Bam!
Mon chat, splatch
Gît sur mon lit
A bouffé sa langue
En buvant dans mon whisky
Quant à moi
Peu dormi, vidé, brimé
J’ai dû dormir dans la gouttière
Où j’ai eu un flash

Hou! Hou! Hou! Hou!
En quatre couleurs
Allez hop!
Un matin
Une louloute est v’nue chez-moi
Poupée de Cellophane
Cheveux Chinois
Un sparadrap
Une gueule de bois
A bu ma bière

Dans un grand verre
En caoutchouc

Hou! Hou! Hou! Hou!
Comme un indien dans son igloo

Ça plane pour moi!
Ça plane pour moi!
Ça plane pour moi moi moi moi moi!
Ça plane pour moi!

Hou! Hou! Hou! Hou!
Ça plane pour moi!

Allez hop! La nana
Quel panard!
Quelle vibration!
De s’envoyer
Sur le paillasson
Limée, ruinée, vidée, comblée

“You are the king of the divan!”
Qu’elle me dit en passant

Hou! Hou! Hou! Hou!
I am the king of the divan

Ça plane pour moi!

Allez hop t’occupes t’inquiètes
Touche pas ma planète
It’s not today que le ciel me tombera
Sur la tête
Et que l’alcool me manquera

Hou! Hou! Hou! Hou!
Ça plane pour moi!

Allez hop ma nana s’est tirée, s’est barrée
Enfin c’est marre, a tout cassé
l’évier, le bar me laissant seul
Comme un grand connard

Hou! Hou! Hou! Hou!
Le pied dans le plat

Ça plane pour moi!

But don’t worry if you can’t understand French. Because they don’t make any sense even translated to English!

Here’s the English translation:

Wam! Bam!
My cat Splatch
Lies on my bed
Has eaten his tongue
Drinking my whiskey
As for me
Few slept, emptied, bullied
I had to sleep in the gutter
Where I had a flash

Hou! Hou! Hou! Hou!

In four colors
Come on, hop!
One morning
A louloute is coming home
Cellophane doll
Chinese hair
A plaster
A hangover
Drank my beer
In a big glass
Made of rubber

Hou! Hou! Hou! Hou!
Like an Eskimo in his igloo!

That plane for me!
That plane for me!
That plane for me!
It’s ok for me me me me me!
That plane for Me!

Hou! Hou! Hou! Hou!
That plane for me!

Come on hop!
The chick
What a panard!
What a vibration!
To send each other
On the doormat
Limed, ruined, emptied, filled
“You are the king of the couch!”
That she tells me by the way

Hou! Hou! Hou! Hou!
I am the king of the couch
That plane for me!

Come on, worry about worrying
Do not touch my planet
It’s not today
That the sky will fall on me
On the head
And that I will miss the alcohol

That plane for me!

Come on, my girl
Pulled herself out
Ran away
Finally it’s tired
Broke everything
The sink, the bar
Leaving me alone
Like a big asshole

Hou! Hou! Hou! Hou!
Foot in the dish!
That plane for me!

The lyrics are all in French, but it’s great anyway. This came out right when punk rock was starting and this song was always popular with punkers. Bertrand started his first band, Hubble Bubble, as a punk rock band in 1974. Did punk rock even exist in 1974? Maybe The Dolls? The Dolls were proto-punk at the very least. But it officially started with the Sex Pistols in 1976.

Actually, Punkers had great taste in music. They liked a lot of music that was not necessarily punk at all.

And some of you wonder why I’m a rocker and I say I’m going to rock til I drop. I’ll be rocking into my 80’s if I make it that far. Rock music isn’t for the young. The young at heart? Maybe so. It’s for everyone of all ages!

Listen to the beat on this track. I guess I am mystified at how anyone could not be a rocker, much less out and out hate rock music. My Mom’s generation thinks it is simply loud and obnoxious, but I played a pop music song for her on the radio the other day and I can’t believe she actually liked it.

Assuming you have to problem with noisy music, how can any human being not love this kind of music?

I know Black people don’t particularly like rock and that’s ok. But how can Black people not dig a rockin’ beat like this? Color me mystified.

Rock music is great because it actually infiltrates your body and gets it moving in some pretty wild and often sexual ways.

I remember I had this young woman friend over at my house. She had a male friend with her. We both recently graduated from university. She came over to buy some LSD for herself and her roommate because I was dealing acid at the time. Haha.

She was a rather tense and uptight young woman, and I am not sure if she had had a lot of sexual experience. Anyway ,she had her male roommate here with her. I put on a Germs track, “Lion’s Share” off the soundtrack to the movie, Cruising. By the way, great movie!

The beat started pounding out, and at first she looked shocked and stunned like she had gotten an electric shock. Then I saw a wave of energy pulse through her body, jolting it around like she was having a tiny epileptic seizure. That’s rock and roll! It literally grabs your damned body, goes right inside of it and starts jolting your body energy this way and that! It’s almost like a recreational drug in that sense. You experience rock music at a purely physical level./strong>

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2 thoughts on “Plastic Bertrand, “Ca Plane Pour Moi””

  1. I like some French music and movies. I can read and understand properly. When spoken slowly, yes, it makes sense to me.

    I spent two-three days in France: only to traveled Paris, Versailles and Orleans. That was during my first ever trip to Europe, Summer 2014. I did travel to Europe in 2015 for a bit longer – around three months, but I did not go to France again after that.

    But quality-wise, the time I spent in France was almost everything anyone dreams of. I kinda loved France. I understood the French language audio notifications at the metro stations. The place felt so familiar.

    I visited the following places. Can’t imagine now that it’s even possible to cover so much in just 2-3 days.

    1. Eiffel Tower (of course, that’s the first thing for me to see)

    2. Champs Elysees

    3. Arc de Triomphe

    4. Louvre Museum

    5. Notre Dame Cathedral

    6. Moulin Rouge

    7. Tulieres Gardens

    8. Centre Pompidou

    9. Place de la Concorde — That’s where the Bastille prison was. I was staying at a cheap hostel in Bastille.

    10. Le Rex club — Only nightclub I went to. Moulin Rouge was more for photographs.

    11. Chateau d’ Versailles (Versailles)

    12. Joan of Arc statue (Orleans) –I went there to meet an authentic French hooker. I mean you don’t come all the way to France without fucking a Frenchwoman. We met on Facebook. She had promised to show me around. Paris hookers (who’re mostly Romanian or Polish anyway) usually demand more money.

    This French lady was very reasonable, 75 Euros and a few cheap gifts, and I had a great time. You couldn’t even tell she was a hooker. She carried herself very gracefully. She also said that she entertains very few clients generally, and I that was very special. I knew it was bullshit of course.

    France can overwhelm your senses…you feel so rustic and unpolished when surrounded by so much class. It’s the land of sophistication, high culture, and rich history.

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