Back in the 1970’s we had the idea that most men had a feminine side and most women had a masculine side, the degrees varying among different folks. We straight men had a lot of freedom in terms of gender expression. This was the glam rock and disco era, and we could do all sorts of crazy things without getting called gay. The assumption was everyone was straight until proven otherwise, which makes sense to me. No one talked about homosexuality much. Gays were not much out and consequently you hardly saw one or heard about them. Obviously they were walking about invisibly, but one could almost delude oneself that homosexuals barely existed.
If I wore now those crazy outfits I wore back, people would insist that I was gay. This would be a proven fact and no amount of arguing could convince anyone otherwise. This would also be the case if I acted as androgynous now as I did then. I always had a strong masculine side, but I had a strong feminine side running along with it in such an incomprehensible mix that a lot of people threw up their hands about my sexual orientation. I can’t tell you how many times people asked me in exasperation, “Are you straight or bi or gay or what!?” I didn’t make sense.
I was able to be a much softer, gentler, kinder, man, and I connected to women much better. Most of my friends were women because it seemed like I thought like them and that made it easy to click with them, and frequently macho males often made me sick. I used to joke that guys either wanted to fuck me or beat me up and sometimes both.
I’m angry and sad. I enjoyed having more of my feminine side out. It’s a beautiful part of me, and it softens a lot of my typically male aggression. I adopted a hard, tough, Alpha masculine role, and while I could do this, I had to lower my feminine side to do it. Hypermasculine is not bad and a lot of women like it, but I often feel that I don’t act like myself anymore,
The rise of gay rights also reduced a lot of gender expression for straight men because straight men began constricting their gender expression to hardening the masculine and reducing the feminine as a way to not be seen as gay.
If you want to know why men act hypermasculine, here you go. I am straight but I have been gay-bashed three times, once with a baseball bat. He was beating me in the head with the bat and screaming faggot. Also, people often thought I was gay or bi, and radfems might disagree, but this is not a good thing for a straight man in straight society, as it causes a lot of stupid problems that never seem to go away. And gay men won’t leave you alone.
You can solve all of these problems, avoid getting beaten by bats, and keep gay men at much more of a distance if you just macho it up to hypermasculinity. We men are not stupid. We don’t act hypermasculine to scare off women or hate women. Often it just makes life so much easier.
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Well, you can be hypermasculine maybe without glaring and being an asshole. That seems to be the case with many!
Hypermasculine is often fake, normally pushed on by wives. My brothers are into that now – because they think my mom is being scammed, which she sort of is. Anyway, talking to them is like talking to a prison guard or marine now. It’s sort of comical. It’s similar to “I don’t care. I don’t give a fuck! Shut up!”.
So anyway, this attitude is going cause anger in others because you cannot argue with them. They’re always right! According to them, nobody earns their keep, I mean who could earn their keep according thier standards? Also, for damn sure, they aren’t living the same standards they bitch about to others now!
So my brothers are disowned. I mean, I have no interest in hanging with them like brothers. Fuck em !! đ
To be honest, being normal, not some tattoed, angry, bearded mo-fo, is normal for men. But now some dumb prick will tease you for being gay – simply for acting iike what used to be a normal male.
But I think gay really means “nerd” or “geek”. I don’t think even the people throwing the insults believe it means gay, unless they’re retarded!
There seems to be a big “in-group” thing at most colleges, workplaces now. So people not “in that” are going to be massively persecuted.
i’ve an old book published in 1964 titled “The Adjusted American.” I think of it as “The Mal-adjusted American” as the authors spend way too much time discussing self-acceptance as affected by what others think of you. in fact, they term that “indirect self acceptance.” didn’t take long to tire of the constant inclusion of “others” in the discussion. what is obvious is the tenuousness of even considering what others might think, as they are just as likely to be ruminating what you’re thinking of them.
this present “in-group” fascination. how ’60’s high schooler is that. what goes around comes around. well, if it helps with more sex, than therein lies its worth.
http://www.antipasministries.com/bootstrap_articles/file000024.html
All this stuff is feeding the Trump phenomenon.