Answered on Queera.
The best definition of an androgynous man is a man who has strong masculine and strong feminine characteristics going at the same time. Remember glam rock back in the 1970’s? Many of those male rockers were quite androgynous, and most of them were very heterosexual or at least leaned straight.
Another definition of androgynous means a man who looks and acts so much like a woman that you can’t tell if he is a man or a woman. Or the opposite in a woman. Most if not all such cases of extremely feminine men who appear to be women and extremely masculine women who seem to be men that I have studied are in fact homosexuals. In fact they are very gay.
Now if you include men like Prince as androgynes, there are indeed some straight men like this, as Prince was completely heterosexual.
Honestly we straight men had a lot more leeway in terms of true androgyny back in the 70’s.
A straight man could wear scarves, velvet pants, silk shirts, short kimonos, smoking jackets, tight jeans, dancing shoes, and four inch blue platform heels without most people suggesting you were gay. I wore all of these things on a regular basis! People would just say you were “styling it.” You could act a lot softer, gentler, or more androgynous. You could have a strong feminine side, especially if you matched it with a strong masculine side.
Back then, people were assumed straight until proven otherwise, and there were not many out gays anyways. Accusing a man of being gay was a very serious matter, as this was seen as a horrible insult if he was straight. So most men were simply assumed, correctly, to be straight until proven otherwise. If you wanted to accuse a man of being gay, you had better have had some pretty damn good evidence to back it up.
I am actually nostalgic for those days. I had so much more freedom back then in terms of both clothing and behavior.
Now that gays are so out, we straight men can no longer wear those wild clothes I talked about above nor can we act the way I did back then. If I tried to wear any of that stuff now that I wore back then, people would automatically assume that I was gay or bi. If I told them I was straight, no one would believe me, and they would all accuse me of lying. Compared to back then, acceptable behavior and garb for straight men has become dramatically restricted.
It’s not been a positive change. We have gone backwards in a huge way.
3 thoughts on “Can You Be Androgynous yet Be Heterosexual/Straight?”
I’ve always felt that Asian men are a bit androgynous i.e. they don’t act like men of other races. Blame it on the soy and peanuts in their diets. That is why I don’t eat tofu products, soy sauce, sushi, and shrimp. Gotta stay away from all those estrogen-mimicking compounds.
A hot girl passes by them: Asian men just do not want to react. Not one bit. They’ll be either looking at their shoes or on their smartphones. They’ll almost never bite the bullet and do something manly, like asking a random girl out.
Asian men almost never make the move. It’s not that they’re timid but they just don’t feel the need to ask a girl out. Asian courtship rituals are based on obscure signals laced with awkward side glances and uncomfortable smiles. Sex is almost always initiated by the girls because the men aren’t doing their part.
Last December, I met this Japanese boy aged 20 years in Bangkok. We got along rather well and descended together from the train station near Hua Lamphong. And then we decided to walk down to Khao San Road, a famous Bangkok thoroughfare popular with foreigners.
We sat down at an open eatery to grab a hot Thai meal. Suddenly, this Jap guy runs into a Jap girl from his University. Holy cow, it’s not like every day you meet someone you knew from your hometown in a random foreign land. They do say “hello” to each other. But that’s about it.
I immediately invite the Jap girl to sit next to me. With suggestive hand gestures. She complied. I was able to make her giggle of course but I wanted her to go out with this dorky Japanese kid. He was hopeless.
This guy almost didn’t talk. I did all the planning. I asked this girl to “give his Jap friend some good company”. Of course, she politely refused but even Jap girls like to be approached. Like come on, if I unexpectedly meet a hot girl who I knew from somewhere in the past, I just wouldn’t leave her alone.
This Jap guy goes on to explain to me “That in Japanese culture, it’s unacceptable to be so forward with others.”
I tell him, “Screw your Japanese culture. You must have sex with this girl from your hometown tonight. If you’re a real man.”
The girl looks at me with bewilderment. I just explain to her, “I was kidding. You gotta take Isiko-Hooo-Choo and show him around the place. He’s from your hometown. It’s your duty. I am telling you to do it.”
She immediately agreed. First, she called her female friends on the phone and “consulted” with them on whether it is OK for them to take this guy in their little group. I knew it would be shot down so I grab the phone from her miniature hands and have a word with the girls. They are all giggling together.
Long story short. The Jap guy scores a date with 3 girls at once. He can’t believe his friggin’ luck. Before we part, he hugs me profusely. Something you don’t see in a reserved Japanese culture.
Later I was to learn that the girls ditched him. I just told him, “You are hopeless. But keep trying.”
Androgyny seems to be dead. The guys now are so retarded, they think anyone with mildly long hair is faggoty. It’s practically like the 1950s again. Well, even the 1940s hairdos are back!
Man you boomers are hella wild with your leaded fuel filled brains n bones. Lol. Man, did you never hear about The Cure, or the myriad of subcultures where straight men are just fine being their wonderful, androgyne selves? Ya’ll fell out years ago, and now us GenX/Y/Z’s have to pay for all your closeted bigotry and ignorance.