How I Flirt with Women

I do not use openers. I do not do cold approaches. I cannot think of anything more retarded than a cold approach. A cold approach means you walk up to some woman who is showing no interest in you whatsoever and make some sort of a Game-style approach. I am not sure exactly what the approach involves. I generally don’t do this. If a woman is ignoring me, I assure you she’s doing it for a reason. Sometimes I talk to them anyway for some reason, but 90% of the time, they make it clear almost immediately that they don’t like me like that, and in fact that they do not want to talk to me at all about anything.

I figure this is about where cold approach is going to get you.

The only time I would ever approach a woman is if she gave me some sort of Indication of Interest. I know exactly what these look like, and truth is, I don’t get them a lot anymore, but I sure used to.

Once you get a good, solid IOI, you can of course approach her, but even then, you need to be careful. I have no idea why, but even some women who give you some pretty blatant IOI’s will sort of blow you off once you actually do approach them. In the case where a woman gave me an IOI, I approached her and then she sort of gave me a cold shoulder, I just wrap up the conversation right away and take off. If she wants me to stick around and talk then she needs to act like it. Also it is very awkward to continue talking to a woman who is giving you signals that say in one way or another “not interested.”

In addition, even I have been called creep or something along those lines more times than I can count, and it’s done a number on my confidence to the point where I am almost paranoid-cautious around women. Really the definition of creep is just:

Creep: A man who I am not attracted to is trying to engage me sexually in some way with looks, conversation, etc.

That’s pretty much all it is. Sure, there are some men who act awful and really do act like creeps, but that’s only maybe 10% of the guys that get called creep. This word has become horribly abused these days and it’s just another way for women to make us feel guilty for the evil crime of trying to have sex with them.

In terms of actual flirtation, I just start off talking about ordinary, day to day things. To start off the actual flirting, you can always just tell her how beautiful she is or how pretty she is. That’s usually what I do. This goes over pretty well.

But the truth is that I generally do not start flirting with women. I play “Innocent Little Boy” and simply sit back and engage in casual conversation while throwing out the occasional “lure” that can’t really be proven to be a sexual comment. I see if she bites at the lures. Then I do this thing I call “opening the door.” I make the woman feel as comfortable as possible with saying anything sexual to me. The attitude is, “It’s ok to be a total slut with me because I love sluts.” Slut-shaming doesn’t work. You are trying to seduce this woman, and you are a slut-shamer? How is that going to work now?

Then I just sit back and wait. Usually after not too long of a time, maybe an hour or two at most, it seems like they get frustrated that I am not making a move on them. Sometimes they blurt out sexual stuff out of what looks like exasperation. I remember one who said out of the blue for no reason at all, “But Bob! You’re so cute!” So there’s your green light right there.

Most of the time, they will simply start talking about sexual things in general like their sex lives, the latest guy they are fucking, what he’s like in bed, that some particular food is an aphrodisiac, that they write erotic articles online under an assumed name, on and on.

Really any time a woman starts talking to you about sex for no reason at all she is giving you a huge green light. A woman who just wants to be friends should never start blatantly talking about sexual things with her male friend because whenever a woman does that, she is pretty much greenlighting the guy. So women, if you do not want to greenlight men, don’t start talking about obviously sexual topics with them.

Then when I get that green light, I open up and start talking about sex stuff with her. However, I do so cautiously at first. Then both parties start flirting away, and I am very good at flirting.

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4 thoughts on “How I Flirt with Women”

  1. Good text, Robert. However, I’d like to emphasize that cold approach really works sometimes and can be funny if you’re in the vibe and don’t mind about a possible rejection.

  2. I used to have to do that dumb stuff, thank god I wised up – which led to me getting married. The general rule is that women feel guilty about promiscuous sex (so do men to a lesser extent) and they are torn from the git-go and this is why they act as they do to men in bars or other places. Conversely, they don’t want a man to come up and start talking about how it’s time for him to settle down – they don’t want this because they want to feel as if they have shot the prize lion not adopted an poor dog from the humane society.

    So the best way is to not go out looking for sex – it’s really not very fulfilling in the long run anyway. What you want is wife-material – even if you don’t want to get married (you actually do but that’s another discussion). So do something with yourself – work out, lose weight, read, get smarter, make more money; in short, concentrate on yourself and not them. Then follow Robert’s advice about never doing the cold approach – that will fail no matter how great you are. The star quarterback didn’t have to cold approach his girlfriend right? And here’s another one – develop a group of friends with females in it and hang out with them vs going out to the bars with one or two guy friends and wondering why nothing is working. Again, you are working on yourself, your friend circle. It is 100000x easier to have your girl “friend” introduce you to some friend she is trying to set up than for you to cold approach said friend.

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