This is a Gay Website

Repost from the old site. I have a little secret. Lots of people think that I am gay. It’s actually a problem. I get a girlfriend, and if she is not a total moron, she asks if I am bisexual. Or if used to be gay. WTF is this “used to gay” BS? Once a homo, always a homo, right gays I mean guys? If she’s a moron, she asks if I still am. This is supposed to be some sort of a horribly embarrassing and humiliating thing for me, as my enemies love to use it to attack me. I must suffer sexual confusion. I must indeed. I never really understood precisely why people think this way, as I have never seen myself on videotape. I consider myself a fairly masculine acting guy, and that’s how I feel deep down inside and that is what I identify with, but hey, I grew up in the 1970’s when everyone was sort of androgynous, and this is how I sort of ended up. I have a very soft voice and I like to walk in a fluid way. I’m still kind of skinny in a stupid and now 10 pounds overweight and can’t lose an ounce kind of way. I cross my legs sometimes. I call it relaxing, but others call it gay. Can’t a guy kick back and enjoy himself? Maybe it’s gay relaxing, in which case, dude, I am all fagged out, but that is ok. One thing you can do if it seems like half of the sentient universe thinks you are a fag is to find a nonsentient partner, who are easy to acquire in our inner cities. Or else you can get an Asian chick. Asian chicks never think you are gay, cuz compared to Asian guys you are probably like Sylvester Stallone. I was in bed with this Asian woman once, and we still had our clothes on but not for long, and she asked, “So, are you feeling lazy today?” It’s true I was, but actually I was totally exhausted and plus I was totally stoned out of my gourd, as what better to do an Asian chick, then to take a couple of massive bong hits and then go to town on her? As I am one lazy-ass mofo, and anyway truth is we all are, even so-called workaholics (GMAB), but yet I was insulted, yet I should have agreed and bragged about how I was swindling welfare or something equally lumpen and parasitical. So Asian chicks think I am lazy but they never think I’m queer, except this Vietnamese woman who pointedly told me, “You look like a gay!” Well, that was nice of her, blaming God and all that. Thanks bitch. It’s true! My face is all fagged out and I have the queerest features around, and let me tell you man, there’s nothing better. You get girls and guys both after you in whole armies sometimes, and it’s good to be loved. One consequence of the Dang is that dude fagged out or what? thing is HOCD, or homosexual OCD. This is easily the stupidest mental illness on Earth, except they are terrified they are queer even when they are not, and it totally ruins their life over absolutely no damned good reason whatsoever. So in a way it is a nihilistic sort of mental illness, a mental illness that only Kafka could have invented, an absurd mental illness that has no right to exist at all, kind of like most of us, you know? I have done therapy with some HOCD sufferers online. It’s an interesting experience, but it’s also terrifying in a stupid way. If you ever got caught up in the straight person worried they are queer illness (Man, this that the lamest mental disease on Earth or what?), I do have some therapies for you. First of all, admit it. Admit you are queer, take pride in it and advocate it in everyone around you. If you are really insane, you can even make sexual offers to the males around you. This is fun, because since you are straight (Yeah sure! LOL) you don’t really want to do it. It’s the ultimate expression of macho to say you’re queer and shout it to the skies. You hope everyone knows it’s a lie, but if not, you were just gay for a day, and that’s always a blast. If I were comfortable with this, it would be one thing, but really I am not. I don’t like effeminate behavior in men, and I try to stay as far away from gay and bisexual men as I can. I’ve had far too many experiences with regular guys, married guys, on and on, to not be wary. I can’t even count the number of guys who I felt were getting way too friendly with me. At least 2 Second of all, advocate for gay rights, now that you are gay and all that. Imagine that you are driving down the street and there is a billboard that has your name and picture on it and says, “[YOUR NAME] IS GAY!” And it has your photo and everything. And then the paper comes and your pic is on the front page with a headline about how you are REALLY GAY! And everyone is laughing at you and calling you a fag and all, but that right there is a great reason to party, so just make one. Now when someone asks you to sign your name, you want to lie and write “Gay fag McCoy” and just leave it at that, but for the sake of social peace, you resist the urge. Anyway, it took me a long time to just figure out that I am what I am. Not only do I dislike effeminate behavior in males; I also dislike wimpy males. Deep down inside, there is a part of me that is as macho as any man that ever lived – a lumberjack, a trucker, a fisherman – you name it, I can play that role. Not only that but it’s really me, it really is, and if you disagree with that, will kill you will no regrets as my inner Viking dictates. I guess there is another side to me, and that’s ok. I always idolized Mick Jagger, Steve Tyler, the New York Dolls, Mott the Hoople and all the androgynous rock stars of the 1970’s. We all grew up with that, and it’s just normal to be that way. These dudes dressed up like chicks and even wrote totally fagged out songs, but really they were just a bunch of gangbangers, a White Crips and Bloods, and they never queered around, or not too much anyway, or at least I don’t even care who fagged off and sucked on knobs and who didn’t. If I could just tell folks, no, I’m straight, thank you very much, and it would be over, that would be ok. But the questions never stop coming, and the doubts never end. I must say it is discouraging, but only because this is such an important question. A certain type of woman gets asked if she likes women, says, “No, I’m strictly dickly”, and the questions end, but for us guys, the doubts just linger. Is that stupid or what? I mean, bitch, I mean woman, I said I’m straight and that means I’m straight! You either understand that or you get tied to the bed again, is that understood? And you will answer Sir!” Society must find male homo- and bisexuality much more upsetting than the female kind. Anyway, as there is nothing I can do about this, and this unfortunate issue with remain with me for life, I assume, I hereby anoint this website an officially gay website. We will just make macho fraternity jokes about fags and stuff, and guys who are bi-queerious, I mean bi-curious, but all the while we won’t even fag off, not even once, and if he’s real cute, we promise. Kind of like a great bachelor pad or frat house. I must admit that there is a part of me that loves being called gay. It’s just so wrong. I’ve gotten to the point where the best way to deal with it is to laugh uproariously and say, “I LOVE it when people think I am gay!” Then I dance around the room and do my best gay imitation while hopefully some dudes go, “Whoa! Is this guy really is a queer?”, in their friend’s ear, and that makes it even better, as long as they don’t try to kick your ass or anything. Then I love to tell gay stories just to freak people out and keep them guessing. Like, “I’m not gay or anything, but I once went to a gay bar and drank 13 Penis Coladas, one after the other. Oh, man were they great!” But hey, I was young and experimenting and lots of guys do crazy things once or twice, even Hugh Hefner fucked a guy once, and if you call me a queer one more time, I am going to have to seriously kick your ass or maybe even kill you, do I make myself understood? So it’s time for an obligatory gay post. How about Heroic Homo Sex? I love to talk about this website, because every time I do, everyone starts freaking out and looking at me like, “Shut up you idiot! Are you a FAG or what?” All the more reason to talk about it more and more and not just piss off a few people, but piss off as many people as possible! Anyway, even if you are not gay, this is a great site. This is a site that deals with homosexuality and masculinity, gay culture and effeminate men, AIDS and the contours of masculinity. The author is gay himself, and the site has quite a bit of gay erotica and pornography. If that freaks you out, you better not go there. But it’s definitely worth the look. The purpose of the site is to attack several aspects of modern gay life: anal sex and promiscuity. These are gay men who are not into anal sex; they think it is painful, dangerous and degrading. And they have a fascinating thesis. The thesis goes like this: Before gay liberation, gay men met and had relationships and engaged in all sorts of sex behaviors. Anal sex was not even that popular, and gay men were not tremendously promiscuous. But with gay liberation, came the normalization of gay anal sex. According to the various articles linked on the site: the obsession with anal sex has been linked to gay liberation – gay lib mandated anal sex as a substitute for heterosexual intercourse. But the site painstakingly points out that the two types of sex are not the same. A vagina is designed by evolution to take a heavy duty penis-pounding, after all, this is one of its purposes. It’s hard to damage a vagina, as it has a lot of redundancy in its walls. Hence the vagina is relatively refractory to getting blood-borne diseases like AIDS and Hepatitis C and B. You pretty much need to bleed a bit to get a disease like this, and it’s not so easy to make a vagina bleed. It amazingly accommodates a full-grown baby easily, another of its purposes. An anus is not like this at all. Evolution designed it for elimination, and it has a very thin wall that is easily damaged, if even slightly, during anal sex. Bottom line: bleeding, even microscopic, usually occurs during anal sex. HIV is transmitted easily this way, as is Hepatitis B. Furthermore, no one ever talks about this, but the site points out that regular anal sex causes anal leakage and fissures (small tears in the anus). More heavy duty stuff like fisting (that a lot of gays are into) can cause anal incontinence, fistulas and all sorts of nasty stuff. Anal prolapse can occur with years of this sort of sex. Yet the gay community relentlessly promotes anal sex in gay pornography and even gay medical sites. On the medical sites, gay docs tell you to go ahead and engage in anal sex and don’t seem to steer men away from it. Heroic Homo Sex feels that anal intercourse is ultimately damaging, if only slightly, to the anuses of gay men. Plus they are repulsed by the whole act. They also promote a fascinating theory: it is not possible to get fucked, anally or vaginally, without having to play a submissive role. Getting fucked makes a person submissive. So gay sex, or being on the receiving end of it anyway, makes gay men submissive and ultimately effeminate. This because getting fucked is feminizing. Fucking is masculinizing. Andrea Dworkin tried to say much the same thing about the violence inherent in the normative heterosexual sex act, but she was raked over the coals. It is rape, dammit! That’s why you need to encourage your female partners to engage their rape fantasies to the fullest, since tons of women love to think about getting raped. So rape and rape and rape away, and make a satisfactory adjustment to married life anyway, as the old Abnormal Psych textbooks used to say. Women act feminine in part because they get fucked. Men act masculine in part because they fuck. Have you ever noticed that when a woman wants to get fucked, or if you are getting ready to fuck her, she tends to act more and feminine, to the point where she is some kind of a silly Barbie Doll Southern woman thing? Then in the sex act itself of course, tons of women want and love pain (trust me), as (my theory) being a woman is so painful, so if you’re a woman, you either become a bit of a sub and enjoy life or you are screwed and miserable and all bitched out. The sex act itself, and the role one plays in it, has carry-over effects into nonsexual life. The guys at Heroic Homo Sex are some interesting gay men. Not only are they repulsed by anal sex, but they are also sickened by the effeminate behavior of gay men. They propose an alternative: that gay men should become more masculine. As, deep down inside, I love masculine behavior, I have to cheer this on. This is great: there is a positive value in masculinity for any male, even a gay one. The site is full of images of masculine gay men acting masculine, and it promotes a masculine mindset among the gay men who go there. Hear hear! What they promote is something called frottage, which is basically two guys more or less rubbing their dicks up against each other. This is often combined with masculine images like wrestling and various forms of martial arts. I guess there are variations on this theme, but it’s quite safe in terms of VD (a horrific problem with gay men due to the wild homosexuality many of them pursue), and it enables gay men to have sex with each other and at the same time retain a masculine identity. They take the theorizing a bit further. They suggest in some of their essays that anal sex is inherently degrading in and of itself, at least as it is practiced in the gay community. So not only does anal sex make gay men effeminate, it also degrades them and makes them into “sluts”. This has been a part of gay porn culture too – the promotion of anal sex and rampant promiscuity in gay men. The two are connected, the website suggests. For a man to get fucked anally turns him effeminate and has the effect of “turning him into a slut”. Gay culture promotes the image of the gay man as slut, whore, pig, prostitute, etc. The use of degrading terms is encouraged. So getting fucked effeminizes men and degrades them, turning them into promiscuous “fuck pigs”. There is ample support for this theory if one takes the time to peruse gay culture. Check out the gay personals of any gay website, if you dare, and you will see tons of insane and rampant promiscuity along with a lot of dangerous anally-focused sex and the continuous promotion of the gay slut-pig sort of fellow. Not that I am against slut-pigs at all, but more of them should be female and disease-free. This is my only wish at age 50 where Viagra moments become normative events. The site goes so far as to term this whole gay degradation and sluttification process as a death cult. With AIDS raging through the gay community, that’s not just idle talk. Anyway, interesting website from some gay men who are looking to turn gay culture seriously on its head. In the meantime, they are promoting some fascinating theories to explain hard to explain phenomena – theories that at least look good on paper. And they promote an alternative image of gay men as sexually responsible, disease free, and masculine in a warrior sense. As a straight man who values masculinity in myself and other men, I have to cheer it on. There are links all through the site leading to variations of their main theoretical issues, and you need to click around to get a feel for their whole worldview. I sort of still have a “terror of gay stuff” OCD thing, so it’s really therapeutic for me to click through all this totally fagged out stuff, just to flood myself some more. You cannot run from your fears. They must be embraced, head on, like diving into a swimming pool from a high board with no worries. Then you climb out and do it again and again and soon it’s nothing. The author of the site is a gay man who went through the whole hippie thing in the 1960’s like a lot of us. His partner and the love of his life had a similar developmental trajectory and later acquired AIDS and died of it. The whole site is sort of a tribute to this man who he obviously still deeply loves. I found this touching in an odd way, though normally gay romance doesn’t do much for me. Warning! There is lots of gay male erotica and even gay male porn on that site. I don’t mind; I just kind of speed through that stuff as it isn’t very interesting to me and it bothers me on some level. So if you can’t handle that sort of thing, don’t even go there. If you have HOCD, you need to go there, stop everything, hold the horses, not now, yesterday!

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16 thoughts on “This is a Gay Website”

  1. Ha! About queer looking “straight” rock stars: wasn’t there a story about Mick Jagger and David Bowie being found, one morning, in bed together. Or did I just make that up?

  2. One of the things I love about yoga, meditation, pranayama, etc is that it makes you feel content and happy, without sex. It also allows you to go with the ebb and flow of a rising and tiding libido, rather than try to fight it with Viagra. We should accept the natural cycles of life.

    1. in a cultural aspect, i think japanese for example, even if non christian, are more aware of christiany and have adopted more christian culture (but not the religion) than other religions, thanks to Hollywood, as long as popular culture doesn’t come first, the impact of hindu culture (much less real conversion and adoption of Hinduism) will be pretty niche; the anime Inuyasha make me a little aware of Shinto for example
      http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uguH2dN2uvE

  3. I can see you’re trying to confront this stuff with a smile but as someone who has similar problems I know this affects you to your inner core, to the point you wished you were gay, just so there would be no confusion. I mean, what is worse than a woman thinking you’re gay when you want to get laid? Not fucking much.
    Plus there is the sly comments that people make, insinuating you’re gay. From family, friends, co-workers or just plain strangers. You know, it is no longer a sin to be gay but it is seen to be a sin to try and hide it, so you’re fair game to any bully because they think you’re a closeted gay. It makes me want to kill people sometimes.
    Truly, I wish I had an attraction for men, even a slight attraction, just so I could have a fulfilling sexual relationship without the worries that accompany a hetero relationship as an effeminate man. What will her parents, family and friends say? Will they tease her for being with a gay? That’s not even mentioning her questions, her suspicions.
    This situation is a ball and chain, it’s lonely and desperately confusing. I wish I were gay.

    1. I have a similar issue occasionally. Would you consider yourself good looking, Brengunn? Or have others thought you so–no homo: honest question.
      I think good looking guys generally are thought to be gay more than are less attractive men. I don’t say this as a deflection or conceit, but I’ve found that good looking guys are almost always thought of as at least being possibly bi.
      My own theory is two-fold:
      1) That when gay guys and straight girls chum up, as they are wont to do, gay guys will obviously be more inclined to entertain the possibility that a good looking guy is gay, but not ugly guys. The effect of this is that girls are told by the experts that guys of a certain look (good looks) are more likely to be gay.
      2) This is the stronger point. Ugly chicks, fat chicks and psycho bitches like to call guys they know they deep down could never attract (good looking chaps) gay as a defense mechanism–I’m not a psychopathic, ugly fatty; that guy’s just a fag! Yah, sure, bitch: He likes the cock because you can’t jog a bit or turn off the TV once in a while.
      In other words, it’s lonely at the top (LOL).

      1. When I was young, people often said I was very good looking. In fact, I got offers to be a male model for modeling agencies. I still hear such comments to this very day, though not so much anymore. They also say I am “pretty,” “beautiful,” etc. Pretty boy types are always thought to be gay for some reason, as are very good looking men. It’s true a lot of gay guys are quite good-looking, but many good-looking guys are completely straight. I always wondered if that was what was driving all this stuff. For his whole life, JFK was often thought to be gay, and he himself even remarked on this.

      2. Well, I’d say I’m certainly above average and have been told I’m good looking but I don’t think it’s that, or at least not all of it. I think it’s more my manner.

  4. “I said I’m straight and that means I’m straight!”
    There’s a continuum and most of us are probably not as “straight” as we think we are.

  5. Not really. A lot of straight men are fascinated by homosexuality. It doesn’t mean we are into it. I have been jerking off my whole life to fantasies of females every single time. I can’t remember a single time I masturbated to thoughts of males. Only females have given me erections, and males never have. So gay men may as well be on Mars for all I am concerned. It is interesting to me, but all freaks are fascinating to me, and gay men are definitely freaks to me.
    By the same token, I am fascinated by pedophilia, sadism/masochism, necrophilia, serial killing, urolagnia, coprophilia and coprophagia, etc. I have no sexual interest in any of these things, to be honest.
    I do not hate gays at all. If their homosexuality is as natural and normal as my heterosexuality and there is no cure for it (that is, they are going to be gay forever no matter what with no hopes of change) then obviously it should be celebrated the same way my heterosexuality is.
    Nevertheless, most straight men including me are rather repulsed by obvious depictions of male homosexuality (it is sickening and disgusting), nevertheless it is fascinating a weird way.
    I had a friend (100% straight) who was always making fag jokes, asking to suck my cock, asking me to suck his cock, etc. The guy loves women as much as any man alive and he never had gay sex and he never will. Whether it turns him on or not, I have no idea! But a lot of straight guys like to joke around all the time about gays and being gay. A very large number of them are apparently not the slightest bit gay – they just think it is funny.
    I do have some hostility towards gay males, but it is not due to their sexual orientation! It relates more to a lot of other things. Gay men have a mindset that goes beyond their orientation that is really depraved, corrupt and politically disgusting. Furthermore, I think that mass acceptance of male homosexuality would indeed be a very bad thing for society. The fact that straight men are hostile to this stuff is a good thing and it prevents mass bisexuality among men, which would be a very bad idea indeed.

  6. Well, the “Bob is gay” thing is apparently 100% about the way I look, act, walk, talk, dress, mannerisms, etc. It is 0% about whatever I talk and write about.
    Heroic Homo Sex is cool because these guys are gay but they are seriously embracing masculinity. If I go to a gay website, one of the most sickening things about it is the mass embrace of femininity among gay men. I think if I were gay, the mass femininity of the gay community and the embracing/love of femininity is one of the most sickening things about it. I could never jump for joy at being effeminate or join a community of effeminate men, even if I were gay. Most straight guys are a lot more sickened by the feminine stuff than by the sex acts.
    After all, we have women suck our cocks. It’s not that much different from a guy sucking your cock, except a gay guy is probably better at it. Some of us even engage in ass play with women. I have had quite a few women’s fingers going up my ass and it’s fine with me. I have had fingers and cocks in women’s asses. None of that is all that different from what a gay man does. Women jerk us off. How different is that from a guy jerking you off?
    You see the sex acts are basically the same really.

  7. I do not hate gays at all. I am actually on the mailing list of some major gay organizations and I participate in their political campaigns, so I support gays that way. On the other hand, I do not particularly like to be around gay men too much, due to TONS of bad – weird – bizarre – trippy – mindfucking experiences. If they leave us alone it might be ok, but they usually do not.

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