Great Site: Introvert Zone

Here.

It takes a while before you figure out exactly what it is that you are. Well, I have figured out that I am an introvert. I wasn’t always this bad of one, but this is what I have become anyway. I think I always had some tendencies, but they just got worse with time, and maybe with psychiatric stuff like OCD. Why hang around people if all they are going to do is treat you like you’re weird or crazy? Fuck that. I’m not weird, I’m not crazy, and if you think I am, well, hey, fuck you.

People are always telling me to have a good day or have a good night. Nothing wrong with that, but they always say it like they don’t think I am going to have a good day or a good night. Which is very insulting, because I generally am going to have a good day or night. One more thing, if they really think I am going to have a lousy day or night, why are they telling me to have a good one instead? Why not tell me to have a bad day or have a bad night? Sometimes I get mad. They say, “Have a good day,” in that insulting way, and I say, “No.” They look shocked. “No?” “Yes, no, I’m not going to have a good day. It’s already been a bad day so far, and I don’t think it’s going to pick up later on.” This makes people very upset and flustered, and they think it is really weird.

I must say I resent extroverts, because they have been persecuting me and generally making my life miserable and Hellish for decades now. I suspect they have been firing me from jobs too. I do tend to get fired, but it’s usually not for bad work, fucking off, calling in sick, showing up late, stealing or anything bad like that. It’s always personal – the boss starts hating me after a while. I suspect it might be because I’m an introvert.

At the last job I had, I heard that the boss (and maybe some of the co-workers) were getting really upset about me. They gave me these pitiful breaks every few hours. That year it was raining all the time. So, like a typical introvert, I would grab my umbrella, go outside in the rain and walk up and down the road basically watching the rainwater running down the sides of road like rivers. Mostly I was thinking. Just walking around in the rain, looking at the weather and the runoff, and thinking about stuff. You know, we introverts do that.

Well, the boss and I guess the rest of the staff couldn’t get it. They thought I was mentally ill or something. Apparently this was some kind of extremely profound and disturbing and possibly dangerous aberrant behavior I was engaging in. You know, walking around in the rain thinking about shit. Like humans have been doing since, when? The dawn of man? Well, I figured out that they were getting all weirded about what I was doing, so I had to quit doing it. But I resented that.

I just got read the riot act the other night for being an introvert. After all, it’s a great big pathology, now isn’t it? Another person who was there at the time kindly told me to try to be less shy or introverted or some such shit.

These people don’t get it. We’re always trying. I’ve been trying to “get over it” for a very long time now. Like, say, 24 years? Something like that. It’s a constant effort, or battle or whatever. It never ends. I’ll be fighting this until the day I die.

Funny thing was that I was quite extroverted when I was younger. I wonder how much of this is just illness?

There comes a point where you really ought to just embrace what you are, defend it and enjoy it. I already enjoy it. I’m happy. All the time. All by my lonesome too, a good part of the time. And happy as a clam. Instead of kicking yourself in the butt over it, why not cook up some great tomato penne pasta and eat it alone, like I just did?

This is the way we are. We’re trying to get over it, always trying. But we can’t. Um. Get over it. So…

Extroverts fuck off!

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0 thoughts on “Great Site: Introvert Zone”

  1. At my previous jobs I would just go sit in my car for an hour during lunch. Other people would always go out to lunch somewhere with fellow co-workers. I guess I looked weirdo to them too. I always felt somewhat embarrassed when people would see me in my car on a hot day. I’d usually just be listening to NPR or a talk radio show and just thinking about random things too while eating. I couldn’t fathom going to lunch with others. The times I did, I didn’t feel like it was a real break. I needed some true downtown for an hour while working and that meant to escape from my co-workers as well.

  2. There comes a point where you really ought to just embrace what you are, defend it and enjoy it. I already enjoy it. I’m happy. All the time. All by my lonesome too, a good part of the time. And happy as a clam. Instead of kicking yourself in the butt over it, why not cook up some great tomato penne pasta and eat it alone, like I just did?

    I wish I had your attitude, Robert.

    I myself am an introvert, and hate that fact, and wish I were less of one.

  3. You spend time interacting with people online and you don’t seem shy. I wonder if this fulfills some of your need for socialising.

    If they want to know a little more about what you think about in the rain, they should look here. They’d probably be surprised.

    I think you have arrived at a good attitude- to accept what you are and be happy. Sounds like you’re doing alright.

    1. I am a strange bird. True introverts are appalled by my behavior. I walk up to total strangers all the time in public and start talking to them. True introverts tell me that they would never do that. I also make casual conversation with clerks, tellers, people in line, etc. That’s just my natural way.

      I also talk on the phone a fair amount. The main thing is that being alone is no big deal to me. I’m perfectly happy that way, but I do need to get out once in a while at least to get a bit of a social fix. Even just to the store.

      1. This sounds a lot like me. I actually like being around people and talking with them, but I am perfectly happy being alone; although, I do have to go to a coffee shop or store to at least see some people on a daily basis. That said I have next to zero social anxiety at parties, or just being around large groups in general and can be talkative or even extroverted in those settings.

        But I have zero problem being alone. Zero. Sometimes I will be at my computer surfing the internet all day and I am perfectly happy doing this. I love information! For some reason I like reading about all sorts of things but I really have never had much desire to sit down and write much. Before I got the internet I could spend hours looking up and reading things in my family’s encyclopedia set!

        As far as talking on the phone goes, I usually just do so to convey information whenever possible, never because it is fun for me (I think it’s boring, nobody can provide the informational stimulation in need quite like the internet); the reverse is true for women who love to bull shit on the phone. Although I do make exceptions when it comes to talking with girls I am interested in.

        When it comes to dating I have come to the conclusion that the online realm sucks; trust me, I’ve spent many thousands of hours messing around with it and tried out many sites. Attractive girls don’t go that way and if they do they get 100s of messages. As a fun experiment, I created a fake profile on Plenty of Fish, as an average looking woman (average looking picture). Within a day I received well over 100 messages from horny guys. As a guy you may get 1 or 3 messages a month. If the goal is to use the internet to have sex, it’s actually not that hard, but there will always be something wrong about such a woman as she will be low-value in some way or another, most likely or very overweight, or she could be well past her prime or have some sort of mental health issue. Stay away from that form of dating as it will suck you into a black hole, and not the kind you may want to be in.

      2. Which leads me into my reaction to your post..I’ve always seen you as an unrestrained extrovert. IMO, Introverts rarely communicate, they observe.

  4. I did not talk, not even once, in Kindergarten. I was beyond shy. This was pathological. The teacher talked to my parents, but being that this was 1969, there was little helicoptering going on and I was allowed to go my own silent way. I opened up in 1st grade but I fought this introversion “curse” for 40 years. Something snapped and I suddenly didn’t care anymore. I still managed to get laid and make friends, but I hated talking, and I hated people almost as much as talking. I’m confident and self-assured, I just don’t enjoy interacting directly with people very much. The internet was made for “INTJ’s” like me. I just didn’t care anymore and realized I enjoyed being alone and decided not to fight it. Peace comes at a high price! I don’t mind extroverted people as long as I’m not around them.

    I hate talking, I hate phones. Sometimes my voice seems paralyzed and I can barely open my mouth. Other times I don’t shut up (in the company of people I know). What sucks about being introverted is that this extroverted society is happy to purge you right out of the system.

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