"Men, Madonnas, and Whores," by Alpha Unit

You’ve heard of the Madonna-Whore complex. It’s supposed to be an actual psychological problem whereby a man seeks a kind of surrogate mother as a wife. The problem, of course, is that he can’t have sex with her. She’s too pure for that. So he can only be aroused by women whom society deems to be “bad.” You know, prostitutes and sluts. People who aren’t interested in psychoanalysis also use the term “Madonna-whore complex,” as a way of talking about this tendency men have of dividing women into the Good Girls You Respect and the Bad Girls You Don’t. Usually men are in for criticism over this. This criticism isn’t going to accomplish a thing. First of all, men apparently respond favorably to sluts. People who produce porn must know this, because a quick survey of porn offerings will turn up phrases like:

  • horny sluts
  • teen sluts
  • mature sluts
  • busty sluts
  • hot sluts
  • nasty sluts

Clearly somebody out there knows that marketing women as sluts makes them appealing to guys. They have to be sluts, I’m guessing, if they’re going to kept separate in the guy’s mind from the good women – that is, the women he wouldn’t want anybody calling a slut. Women like his mom, his wife, his sister or his daughter. These are the irreplaceable women. And, as such, they have great value. You’ve only got one mom. Utterly irreplaceable. Your sister is pretty special, even if you don’t always get along with her. You only get so many of them. Can’t be replaced. Your wife or your girlfriend is special. Not necessarily irreplaceable, but special. You’ve got a lot invested in her, emotionally and otherwise. And your daughter. A daughter who’s loved might be the most fretted over person on the planet. These women – and perhaps some special others – are the women other people shall not trespass against. On the other hand, you have other kinds of women. Women who can be easily replaced, for whatever purpose they might serve, and therefore don’t have a whole lot of value. For such a woman, a guy might not feel any obligation to treat her with much dignity or respect. In fact, not being required to treat a woman with much dignity or respect makes her especially appealing for some purposes. There are valuable women, and there are merely useful women. A woman that a man couldn’t care less about but finds useful is essentially an object to him, and the rougher he can treat her, the rougher he probably will – as you can plainly see when you study what men do. Some men admit that a lot of women would be shocked at the capacity men have to objectify women, and shocked at the way men sometimes even talk about women. I don’t think that it’s okay or certainly that it’s good. I’m saying there’s no getting around it. The only dignity women have is the dignity men are willing to accord them – and compel other men to acknowledge. It isn’t a level playing field. That’s why this Madonna-whore, “good girl/bad girl” stuff isn’t going away anytime soon. That said, a man can choose to accord a woman some dignity – any woman at all, no matter what his business is with her. That’s called being a gentleman. But that’s his prerogative.

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8 thoughts on “"Men, Madonnas, and Whores," by Alpha Unit”

  1. Speaking of sex, well, this is kinda off-topic but I Robert you will be interested in this.
    After much frustration with online dating (sending out 100 emails and maybe getting 5 responses, all from ugs or fatties (same thing really)), I created a profile, but as an experiment I made myself a 25 year old woman. I used a free stock photo of a woman who is a 6 or 7 on a dime scale. Within 5 minutes I received 4 instant messages & 5 e-mails from guys.
    No I know what it’s like. Guys outnumber girls on these sites by tones. I used to be a copy and past monkey trying to get women online but I never got a response. And I’ma good-looking guy. Now I know why.

    1. You should photoshop a bunch of traits of good looking guys into one picutre and put some outrageous lies in your profile (ie extremely high salary, fancy car, etc) See how many hit you get. If you get a hit from a really hot girl, rent an expensive car and perform the Tiffany Scheme.

    2. I know guys that have done well with online dating, even guys who weren’t great looking. But it just doesn’t work for everyone. I have mixed feelings on the whole online thing. I have a good friend that met his wife from match.com. They just had their 2nd kid. At the same time, I think this is all a symptom of some bad things in society. People are becoming so alienated and disconnected to each other that they simply cannot meet in real life situations like our parents did. 50 years ago it was almost unheard of for a guy or woman to be older than 35 and not married unless something was seriously wrong with them or they were gay. Yet our parents and grandparents didn’t have facebook, match.com, texting, PUA blogs, etc etc. They just met. My dad met my mom through her sister who he went to high school with. It was usually simply stuff like that. Introductions. And women didn’t have such a long list of demands. Mainly that you were a good guy that was respected and could provide and if you had some charm great. But now all these women online they want a guy who can make them laugh nonstop, who has a six pack abs, who can “look as great in jeans as he does in a tuxedo”, who shares all their taste in music and movies and restaurants, blah blah. Even ugly girls are now as picky as cute ones. Even a fat woman can post a profile online and have a bunch of beta males lining up to contact her. Do you know what that does to her ego?

      1. “Even a fat woman can post a profile online and have a bunch of beta males lining up to contact her. Do you know what that does to her ego?”
        Do you know what that does to her waistline?
        Also, you can’t say that modern times haven’t affected men. I used to work at a student diner a few years ago. I rememer a full timer in the dishroom who, not jokingly, said that he wanted to lose his viriginity to Jessica Alba. He missed the point. Mexicans work as dishwashers, they don’t fuck them. This moron was living in a dream world in more ways than one. If he got a woman with a full set of teeth he should consider it a blessing from god.

  2. I like this blog. I like that Tulio and Alpha, come into a chat room with some straight up racist and act like normal decent human beings.

  3. “They have to be sluts, I’m guessing, if they’re going to kept separate in the guy’s mind from the good women – that is, the women he wouldn’t want anybody calling a slut”
    UM…no. They have to be sluts TO BE IN PORN IN THE FIRST PLACE! It’s not exactly hard for me to keep my mom or sister seperate in my mind from the whore on the receiving end of a gang bang.

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