The only thing better than figures is sex. And the only thing better than sex is sexdistics, because you can use your brain and feel horny at the same time, whereas usually, when you’re fucking, your brain shuts off, and for us brainiacs, that’s like DT’s.
Sexdistics are statistics about sex! Yeah!
I read these back in the 1970’s in some book I can’t think of anymore, and I think one I got from Playboy magazine, but I know for sure they’re real, being a guy and all.
~64% of all men have worried that they were gay at some point. For the number of men who went out and sucked a cock to test the theory, we have no sexdistics.
~68% of men have tried to suck their own cocks! Hot damn! You fuuuckin perverts you! Surely most of them weren’t gay or anything like that, ooooh no!
2% of men actually succeeded (!) in sucking their own cocks. Whoa! What do you do after that? Apply for a job at the circus? That means of all the guys who tried to suck their own dick, 97% failed. For the number who sustained serious back problems as a result, we have no sexdistics. How I do know it hurts your back? Ummmmm? I don’t know!
In the late 1970’s, 3% of all young men between the ages of 23-28 were afflicted with “pseudohomosexuality.” Symptoms were a terror that they were gay, lack of arousal to gay stimuli, continuing arousal to straight stimuli, avoidance with paranoia and hostility towards actual gay men, and fear of women. What a weird illness. Almost sounds like gay OCD to me. These are OCD cases where they worry they are gay. It’s extremely common in OCD folks of both sexes, and it’s quite devastating.